Travelling— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more grammatical and concise: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers and organise one or two supporting details with linking words. Also correct verb forms and word order (e.g. 'I'm really into' / 'when I travel'). Keep it to 2–4 sentences.

예시: Yes, I’m really into looking at the scenery when I travel. For example, I enjoy watching the changing landscape because it helps me relax and I often notice interesting houses or fields. Because it’s relaxing, I sometimes take photos to remember the view.

제안: Answer directly, reduce hesitation and repeat ideas more clearly. Give a concise topic sentence then a specific detail or example, using linking words like 'for example' or 'so'. Avoid unnecessary fillers.

예시: Yes, I often take photos and videos of the view from the car window. For example, I usually capture beautiful trees, flowers and interesting weather, and later I sort the best shots on my phone so I can share them with friends.

제안: Provide a clear direct answer first, then give one or two specific reasons with correct grammar and linking words. Avoid unclear phrases and fix subject–verb agreement (e.g. 'my country is surrounded by mountains'). Keep to 2–3 sentences.

예시: I prefer the mountains because my country is surrounded by them and I enjoy hiking. However, I also like the sea and would love to visit it sometimes, even though we don’t have a coastline where I live.

× I really into watching the uh, landscape surrounding me, especially in when I traveling. I really want to see how the world is, how beautiful is.

✓ I am really into watching the landscape around me, especially when I am travelling. I really want to see how the world is and how beautiful it is.

Errors: missing auxiliary verb 'am' with 'really into' and incorrect preposition 'in' before 'when'; 'traveling' lacks auxiliary and should be 'travelling' to match continuous aspect; word order in 'how beautiful is' is incorrect in statements. Suggestion: Use correct verb forms and auxiliaries for continuous present (I am really into; I am travelling), use 'around' or 'surrounding' correctly, and use statement order 'how beautiful it is' rather than question order.

× Ah yes, really. I have many photos and videos in my phone. Umm, in, in outside, uh, taking the outside, umm, taking the good moments, uh, beautiful, uh, weather and beautiful trees and flowers. I really like it.

✓ Ah yes, really. I have many photos and videos on my phone. I take photos outside to capture good moments: beautiful weather, trees and flowers. I really like it.

Errors: wrong preposition 'in my phone' should be 'on my phone' (common collocation); unnecessary fillers and repeated words; awkward phrase 'in outside' and 'taking the outside' are incorrect. Suggestion: Use concise sentence structure, correct prepositions ('on my phone', 'outside') and verbs like 'take photos' and nouns in lists separated by commas.

× Actually my country is surrounding of many mountains and we really into the MO seeing mountains and we really like hiking but in the other side I like watching sea but the seas don't. We don't have the sea in my country.

✓ Actually my country is surrounded by many mountains, so we are really into seeing mountains and we like hiking. On the other hand, I like looking at the sea, but we don't have the sea in my country.

Errors: incorrect passive/active structure 'is surrounding of' should be 'is surrounded by'; missing verbs and auxiliaries ('we really into' needs 'are really into'); unclear phrase 'MO' likely extraneous; 'in the other side' should be 'on the other hand'; 'I like watching sea' needs 'the' or 'the sea' and 'we don't have the sea' is fine but repetitive. Suggestion: Use correct passive form 'surrounded by', include auxiliary 'are' with 'into', use idiomatic connectors 'on the other hand', and include definite article 'the' for 'sea' when referring to it generally.