Travelling— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Good enthusiasm and clear answer. To improve, make your response more natural and concise (max 5 sentences). Replace awkward words like “ecstasy” with more common choices (e.g., “joy” or “pleasure”), correct grammar (e.g., “exploring them” → “exploring it” or specify what “them” refers to), and add one specific detail with a linking word to make it coherent. Keep sentences varied but not long.

예시: Yes, I usually look out the window when I travel by bus or car because it gives me great pleasure. I especially enjoy seeing old buildings and green fields. For example, on trips to my hometown I like to spot different houses and small farms, which remind me of where I grew up.

제안: Clear and relevant answer. To raise your score, be more concise and natural: use simpler phrasing (e.g., “I sometimes take photos”) and add a specific example or reason with a linking word (e.g., “so that I can...”). Avoid repeating similar ideas ("create beautiful moments" and "look at them later").

예시: I sometimes take photos of the scenery from the car window so I can remember special views. For instance, last month I photographed a colourful sunset over the highway to show my family later.

제안: Clear preference, but the answer feels brief and slightly informal. Improve by giving one or two specific reasons, using linking words (e.g., “because”, “and”), and correcting generalisations (mountains aren’t always hot). Use a more natural phrase than “not pleasing”. Aim for up to five concise sentences with a short example.

예시: I prefer the sea because I enjoy listening to the waves and feeling the cool breeze. Also, I find the seaside relaxing, whereas mountains can be tiring to climb. For example, I feel calmer when I walk along the beach and watch the water.

× Yes, I usually look out the window whenever I travel by bus or car because it gives me this ecstasy that excites me.

✓ Yes, I usually look out the window whenever I travel by bus or car because it gives me a feeling of ecstasy.

The phrase 'this ecstasy that excites me' is awkward and uses a noun repeated with similar meaning; 'ecstasy' is a strong noun and 'gives me this ecstasy that excites me' is unidiomatic. Replacing it with 'a feeling of ecstasy' or simply 'ecstasy' is more natural. Also avoid redundant verb + -ing forms that add no meaning. Suggestion: use concise noun phrases like 'a feeling of ecstasy' or 'great pleasure'.

× I love seeing different structures. I love seeing nature and exploring them.

✓ I love seeing different structures. I love seeing nature and exploring it.

The pronoun 'them' refers back to 'nature', which is an uncountable singular noun and requires the singular pronoun 'it'. Using 'them' creates a pronoun agreement error. Suggestion: match pronoun number to the noun: 'nature... it', or rephrase: 'exploring natural places' if plural is intended.

× I occasionally take pictures of the scenery outside the car window because I love to create beautiful moments and also have an opportunity to look at them at some later date.

✓ I occasionally take pictures of the scenery outside the car window because I love creating beautiful moments and also having the opportunity to look at them later.

The original mixes infinitive 'to create' with bare verb 'have' and an awkward phrase 'at some later date'. Using the gerund form 'creating' and 'having' makes the parallel structure clearer, and 'later' is a natural concise adverb. Suggestion: keep parallel gerunds ('love creating' and 'having the opportunity').

× I actually prefer the sea because of the natural waves and it's also very cool, unlike the mountains that are usually very hot and not pleasing.

✓ I actually prefer the sea because of the natural waves and because it is cooler; the mountains are usually hot and less pleasant.

'It's also very cool' versus 'usually very hot and not pleasing' is informal and comparative forms are unclear. Use comparative 'cooler' when comparing sea and mountains, and 'less pleasant' is a more natural adjective than 'not pleasing'. Also avoid contractions in formal responses: use 'it is'. Suggestion: use clear comparative structures and concise adjectives.