Travelling— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be careful with verb tense and keep answer concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details linked logically. Avoid redundancy (e.g. "absolutely yes" + "I really enjoy" is repetitive). Use correct tense: use present simple for habitual actions. Add one linking word to connect ideas.

예시: Yes, I often look out of the window when I travel by bus or car. For example, I enjoy watching how the landscape changes from rural villages to busy city streets, because it helps me relax and notice local life.

제안: Improve vocabulary choice and grammar, and make reasons more specific. Use linking words (for example, because, so) and correct noun forms ("photos" not "the photos" or use article correctly). Replace unclear adjective "transparently" with a precise word (e.g. "clear water" or "misty valley"). Keep to two or three sentences.

예시: Yes, I often take photos of interesting views outside the window, especially steep mountains or clear lakes, because photographs help me capture memorable scenes. Later, looking at these pictures always reminds me of the trip and the feelings I had.

제안: Work on grammar, sentence structure and clarity. Give one clear topic sentence stating preference, then one or two specific reasons with linking words. Avoid awkward phrasing and fix tenses and pronouns (e.g. "I've lived" not "I have lived about 50 years"). Use concise, natural expressions for feelings (e.g. "the mountains make me feel small and awed").

예시: I prefer the mountains. I've lived by the sea for most of my life, so I find mountain scenery more refreshing; moreover, standing among tall peaks makes me feel small and amazed by nature.

× Absolutely yes. I really enjoy watching the scenery outside the window when I was traveling and I think seeing the scenery change from the rural area to the city to the field to the mountains or lakes is very spectacular.

✓ Absolutely yes. I really enjoy watching the scenery outside the window when I travel, and I think seeing the scenery change from rural areas to the city, to fields, to mountains or lakes is very spectacular.

The sentence mixes past tense 'was traveling' with present-tense statements 'I really enjoy' and 'I think', causing tense inconsistency. Use simple present 'travel' to match habitual action. Also pluralize common nouns for natural use: 'rural areas', 'fields'. Add commas for clarity. Grammar problem type ID: 6

× Yes, I often take the photos of the scenery outside the window, especially some special views like a steep mountain or transparently.

✓ Yes, I often take photos of the scenery outside the window, especially special views like a steep mountain or a clear vista.

'Take the photos' implies specific photos already known; for general habit use 'take photos'. 'Transparently' is an adverb and incorrect here; a noun or adjective is needed. I replaced it with 'a clear vista' to convey a transparent/clear view. Also removed unnecessary 'some'. Grammar problem type ID: 22

× It can record that beautiful moment and every time when I see these photos, it will bring me back to that.

✓ They can capture those beautiful moments, and every time I see these photos, they take me back to them.

Subject reference is unclear: 'It' should be 'They' to refer to photos (plural). 'Record' is acceptable but 'capture' is more natural. 'Bring me back to that' is vague; use 'take me back to them' to refer clearly to moments. Also avoid unnecessary 'when' after 'every time'. Grammar problem type ID: 26

× Actually I prefer the views of mountains since I have lived beside the sea about 50 years.

✓ Actually I prefer mountain views since I have lived beside the sea for about 50 years.

Use 'for' to indicate duration with a time period ('for about 50 years'). 'Views of mountains' is awkward; 'mountain views' or 'the mountains' is more natural. Present perfect 'have lived' is appropriate for an action that started in the past and continues. Grammar problem type ID: 7

× So I really tired of it and I think stand in the mountains. Let me feel I I'm small in the world.

✓ So I am really tired of it, and I think standing in the mountains makes me feel small in the world.

'I really tired of it' lacks the verb 'am' for the adjective 'tired' (be + adjective). 'I think stand in the mountains' is ungrammatical; use gerund 'standing' as the subject of 'makes'. Remove duplicate 'I' in 'I I'm'. The revised sentence uses correct subject-verb structure and gerund to express the idea that being in the mountains causes the feeling. Grammar problem type ID: 13