Travelling— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and grammatically accurate. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct verbs, prepositions and article use (e.g., "out of the window," "by car, train, or plane"). Avoid repetition and unclear phrases.

예시: Yes, I often look out of the window when I travel by car, train, or plane because watching the changing scenery helps me relax. For example, I enjoy observing landscapes and city views, and I sometimes try to spot interesting sights like old buildings or colorful markets.

제안: Answer directly and use past or present consistently. Use linking words (for example, especially) correctly and provide specific instances. Remove filler words ("uh") and finish your sentences. Use correct noun forms ("scenery" not "screening") and verb forms.

예시: Yes, I often take photos of the scenery outside the window. For example, I sometimes photograph colorful flowers or people with interesting clothes on passing trains, and then I share the best shots with my friends.

제안: Give a clear direct answer ("I prefer the sea") and then support it with two specific reasons linked with connectors ("because," "and"). Use accurate vocabulary ("open spaces," "unwind") and correct tense and article usage. Keep to under five sentences.

예시: I prefer the sea because I love open spaces and the feeling of fresh air. I also enjoy swimming and relaxing on the beach, which helps me unwind after a busy week.

× Yes, I like looking out of window when I travel by car on train or plane because the changing scenery connects me and makes me very relaxed.

✓ Yes, I like looking out of the window when I travel by car, on a train, or by plane because the changing scenery calms me and makes me feel very relaxed.

Missing article 'the' before 'window' (article error, but primarily affects noun phrase); incorrect prepositions and conjunctions: 'by car on train or plane' should be 'by car, on a train, or by plane' for parallel structure; 'connects me' is unnatural here — use 'calms me' or 'relaxes me'; 'makes me very relaxed' improved to 'makes me feel very relaxed' to use correct verb+object structure. Suggestion: keep parallel prepositional phrases and use gerund 'looking' correctly with articles and natural verbs.

× Of example I will watching the shows from the window, the scenery and I will.

✓ For example, I will watch the scenes outside the window.

Fragmented sentence with incorrect phrase 'Of example' (should be 'For example'); incorrect verb form 'will watching' (modal/future auxiliary + base verb required); extra unnecessary parts 'the scenery and I will' create a fragment. Suggestion: use 'will watch' for future and keep sentence concise: 'For example, I will watch the scenes outside the window.'

× Yes, I often take photographs, the screening outside the car window, especially I when I was saw the interesting clothes on passing trains or the various flowers.

✓ Yes, I often take photographs of the scenery outside the car window, especially when I see interesting clothes on passing trains or various flowers.

Wrong noun 'screening' should be 'scenery' (vocabulary). Comma splice: 'photographs, the scenery...' should be 'photographs of the scenery...'. Tense and clause order: 'especially I when I was saw' is ungrammatical — use 'especially when I see' for habitual action in present simple. 'Was saw' is wrong (double past). Suggestion: use present simple for habitual actions and correct noun and clause order: 'I often take photographs of the scenery... especially when I see...'.

× I will uh, capture the moment and share with my friends so I can uh.

✓ I will capture the moment and share it with my friends so I can remember it.

Ellipsis and missing object: 'share with my friends' needs an object after 'share' (share it with my friends). The sentence ends unfinished 'so I can uh.' Provide a clear purpose in future tense: 'so I can remember it.' 'I will uh, capture' — filler 'uh' removed. Suggestion: complete the clause with an appropriate verb and object and keep future tense consistent with 'will capture' and 'will share' or use simple infinitives.

× I prefer the scene because I love the uh, western spaces and the feeling of fresh air.

✓ I prefer the sea because I love wide open spaces and the feeling of fresh air.

Word choice error: 'scene' vs 'sea' changes meaning; user likely meant 'sea' given context comparing mountains or sea. 'Western spaces' is incorrect; use 'wide open spaces' or 'open spaces'. Pronoun issue not primary but phrase clarity improved. Suggestion: choose correct noun 'sea' and use natural collocations like 'wide open spaces.'

× Uh, I enjoy swimming and relax on the beach, which help me uh, unwinding after a busy week.

✓ I enjoy swimming and relaxing on the beach, which helps me unwind after a busy week.

Parallel structure: 'enjoy swimming and relax' should be 'enjoy swimming and relaxing' (both gerunds). Relative clause subject-verb agreement: 'which help me' should be 'which helps me' because 'which' refers to the activity (singular idea) or 'which' + singular verb. 'Unwinding' should be base verb 'unwind' after 'helps me'. Suggestion: use parallel gerunds after 'enjoy' and correct verb agreement in the relative clause.