Travelling— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Speak more clearly and directly. Start with a concise topic sentence (e.g. “Yes, I usually look out the window.”). Use correct verb forms and avoid unnecessary words or repetition. Provide one specific supporting detail and use linking words to connect ideas (e.g. “For example,” “because,” “so”). Also avoid unclear or incorrect proper nouns and keep answers to no more than five sentences.

예시: Yes, I usually look out the window when I travel. For example, last year I rode an Amtrak train and sat by the window, so I took several photos of the passing countryside. I enjoy watching the changing landscape because it helps me relax and notice small details.

제안: Be concise and correct grammar: give a clear topic sentence and one specific example. Use linking words to explain why you take photos and what you do with them. Avoid repetition and incomplete sentences.

예시: Yes, I often take photos of the scenery from the car window. For example, last week I photographed rolling fields and old houses while driving to visit my family, and later I reviewed the best shots and shared them with friends because they captured special light and colours.

제안: Give a direct preference statement, then support it with two clear reasons linked by connectors such as “because” and “so”. Avoid filler sounds (uh) and unclear phrases. Use correct vocabulary (e.g. “sea” or “the sea”) and describe concrete details about sunsets, colours, or atmosphere to make the answer specific and natural.

예시: I prefer the sea to the mountains because I love photographing sunsets over the water. The wide horizon and changing colours at dusk create dramatic images, so I often plan evenings by the coast to capture the light.

× For sure, I usually book the window seat while I drop.

✓ For sure, I usually book the window seat when I travel.

The original uses 'while I drop', which is incorrect and unclear. The intended meaning is habitual action when travelling, so use 'when I travel'. 'Travel' is the correct verb; 'drop' is wrong here. Use the base verb 'travel' for a habitual present action and 'when' to indicate time.

× For example like last years I Booker Amtrak with the American train ISIS near the window and I take a pic.

✓ For example, last year I booked an Amtrak train ticket and sat near the window to take a picture.

Multiple errors: 'For example like' is redundant (use 'For example' or 'Like'). 'last years' should be 'last year' (singular time reference). 'Booker Amtrak with the American train ISIS' is garbled; likely intended 'booked an Amtrak train ticket'. Use past tense 'booked' for a completed action. 'sit near the window to take a picture' clarifies purpose. Remove incorrect proper noun 'ISIS'.

× I took a picture as well.

✓ I also took a picture.

The sentence is understandable but word order and register are improved by placing 'also' before the verb. Use past tense 'took' to match the time reference 'last year'.

× Lots of beautiful.

✓ There were lots of beautiful scenes.

The fragment 'Lots of beautiful' lacks a noun and verb. To express that many scenes were beautiful, use 'There were lots of beautiful scenes' or 'Many beautiful views'. This adds a subject and verb and corrects the sentence structure.

× Well while I say it's true.

✓ Well, I can say that's true.

Original is ungrammatical. 'While I say it's true' is incorrect use of 'while'. Replacement 'I can say that's true' conveys the intended affirmation and uses correct structure.

× Yes, I of course, I usually take a lot of photos while I'm on the car.

✓ Yes, of course I usually take a lot of photos while I'm in the car.

Redundant 'I' appears twice; remove one. Preposition 'on the car' is incorrect; use 'in the car'. Keep present continuous 'I'm in the car' for ongoing action during the trip.

× For example, last week I took a lot of photos that I look at at the window car.

✓ For example, last week I took a lot of photos looking out of the car window.

The clause 'that I look at at the window car' is ungrammatical and awkward. Use a participle phrase 'looking out of the car window' to indicate where the photos were taken. This is concise and grammatically correct.

× That's really charming photos and.

✓ Those are really charming photos.

Mixes singular demonstrative 'That's' with plural 'photos'; use 'Those are'. Remove the trailing 'and'. Keep adjective 'charming' before 'photos'.

× Personally, I prefer uh C larger than mountains because when I take a photo of the sea, I can uh through the sunsets and twilight at the evening time.

✓ Personally, I prefer the sea to the mountains because when I take a photo of the sea I can capture sunsets and twilight in the evening.

'I prefer uh C larger than mountains' is garbled. Use comparative structure 'prefer X to Y' to compare sea and mountains. 'I can uh through the sunsets' is incorrect; intended 'capture sunsets'. 'At the evening time' is wordy; use 'in the evening'. Ensure consistent tense and clarity.

× So when I look at the again.

✓ So when I look at them again, I remember the trip.

Original is incomplete and missing object. Add 'them' to refer to photos and complete the thought with a main clause such as 'I remember the trip' to make a full, grammatical sentence.