Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise, avoid repetition, and use a clear structure: a topic sentence answering directly, then one or two specific supporting details. Use linking words (for example, “because” or “so”) and correct small grammar errors (e.g., possessive pronouns and article use). Also limit to 3–4 sentences and give a specific example or memory to make your answer more vivid.

예시: Yes. I had a bike when I was a child because my parents bought one for me and my siblings. We were all nearly the same age, so we used to ride it together in the neighborhood every afternoon. It was our favorite way to play and explore nearby parks.

제안: Start with a clear topic sentence that directly answers the question, then give specific reasons and a brief comparison using linking words (e.g., “however,” “because,” “nowadays”). Avoid filler words and repetition. Provide one or two concrete facts or observations to support your view and keep to 3–4 sentences.

예시: Yes, bikes have been popular in my country, but nowadays motorbikes are more common. For example, many people prefer motorbikes because they are faster for commuting in busy cities. However, when I was younger, bicycles were widely used by both children and adults for short trips and leisure.

× I had a bike when I was a child my my mom and dad bought for me and my siblings.

✓ I had a bike when I was a child that my mom and dad bought for me and my siblings.

Run-on and missing relative pronoun: The sentence needs a relative clause to connect 'a bike' and 'my mom and dad bought'. Add 'that' (or 'which') to link the noun to the clause. Also remove the repeated 'my'. Suggestion: use 'that' before 'my mom and dad bought' and delete duplicate words.

× We were we were almost same age and they thought it would be the best best for playing and.

✓ We were almost the same age, and they thought it would be best for playing.

Repetition and missing article: Remove the duplicated 'we were' and the duplicated 'best'. Add the article 'the' before 'same age'. Remove the trailing 'and' which leaves the sentence incomplete. Suggestion: keep it concise and complete the thought.

× Yeah, in my country bikes are popular, but in today's context motorbikes are more than the bikes.

✓ Yeah, in my country bikes are popular, but today motorbikes are more common than bikes.

Incorrect comparative phrasing: 'more than the bikes' is ungrammatical. Use 'more common than bikes' or 'more common than bicycles'. Also simplify 'in today's context' to 'today'. Avoid unnecessary definite article before 'bikes'.

× But in in my generation or in my age, there were so many bikes.

✓ But in my generation, there were many bikes.

Repetition and awkward phrase: Remove the repeated 'in' and the unclear 'or in my age'. Use 'in my generation' to express the idea. 'So many' is acceptable but 'many' is more neutral. Suggestion: keep the phrase concise and clear.

× The adult also ride it.

✓ Adults also rode them.

Number and tense/pronoun agreement: 'The adult' is wrong; use plural 'Adults' to match general meaning. 'Ride' should match past tense used earlier ('there were'), so use 'rode'. 'It' should refer to 'bikes' (plural), so use 'them'. Suggestion: ensure subject number, verb tense and pronoun reference agree.