Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Make your answer clearer and more natural: start with a direct topic sentence, correct small errors, limit to 3–4 sentences, and add one specific detail. Use linking words (for example, "and", "so", "also") correctly and avoid unclear phrases like "fan press". Pronoun reference and verb forms should be fixed (e.g., "my mom bought it for me").

예시: Yes, I did. My mom bought me a small red bike when I was a child, and I often rode it to the neighborhood at about seven or eight years old. I usually rode with friends on weekends, and we enjoyed racing and exploring nearby streets.

제안: Give a direct opinion then support it with specific reasons and examples. Use correct phrasing ("bikes are popular" not "it's popular") and connect ideas with linking words like "because", "for example", or "so". Avoid vague phrases like "the thought like healthy" and finish naturally without filler words like "All right."

예시: Yes, I think bikes are popular in my country because many people cycle for exercise and to avoid traffic. For example, cities have added bike lanes and more people ride to work or school to stay healthy and save money.

× Yes I did, my mom bought this for me.

✓ Yes, I did. My mom bought it for me.

Comma splice and pronoun reference: Two independent clauses were joined with a comma, which should be separated into two sentences. Also 'this' refers to the bike—use the pronoun 'it' for a previously mentioned singular noun. Add a comma after 'Yes' as a brief introductory word. Suggestion: Use a period to separate independent clauses and use 'it' for a previously mentioned object.

× It was a small red bike.

✓ It was a small, red bike.

Incorrect order/ punctuation of coordinate adjectives: When two adjectives independently modify a noun (small and red), they should be separated by a comma. This is an issue of adjective punctuation/ordering, which fits present-tense descriptive sentence formatting. Suggestion: Place a comma between coordinate adjectives: 'small, red bike.'

× When it was around 7:00 or 8:00 I used to ride to the neighborhood on my fan press and also enjoy over the weekend with my friends.

✓ When I was about seven or eight years old, I used to ride around the neighborhood on my father's bicycle and enjoy weekends with my friends.

Multiple problems combined: sentence structure errors and incorrect word choice. 'When it was around 7:00 or 8:00' is incorrect for age—use 'When I was about seven or eight years old.' 'Ride to the neighborhood' -> 'ride around the neighborhood.' 'on my fan press' is incorrect and likely a mis-heard phrase; corrected to 'on my father's bicycle' (common meaning) or 'on my bike' if intended. 'also enjoy over the weekend with my friends' is ungrammatical; use 'enjoy weekends with my friends.' These corrections maintain past habitual tense 'used to.' Suggestion: State age with 'I was ... years old,' use 'around/ about' for approximation, use clear noun for the vehicle ('bike' or 'bicycle' or 'father's bicycle' as appropriate), and use 'enjoy weekends' or 'have fun on weekends.'

× I believe it's popular in my country because nowadays people are thinking about the health.

✓ I believe it's popular in my country because nowadays people care about their health.

Awkward phrasing and incorrect collocation: 'people are thinking about the health' is unidiomatic. Use 'care about their health' or 'are thinking about their health.' Also 'it's popular' is acceptable but 'they are popular' not needed; keep 'it' referring to bicycles. Suggestion: Use 'care about their health' or 'are becoming more health-conscious.'

× The thought like healthy is really important.

✓ Thinking about being healthy is really important.

Ungrammatical noun phrase 'The thought like healthy'—incorrect use of word forms. Use a gerund phrase 'Thinking about being healthy' or 'Health is really important.' This corrects sentence structure and word form. Suggestion: Use 'thinking about being healthy' or 'the idea of being healthy' or simply 'Health is really important.'