Birthday— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is a bit unclear and contains grammatical errors which affect the natural flow. Try to keep your sentences clear and concise, directly answering the question with a topic sentence followed by specific supporting details. Use linking words like 'and' or 'also' appropriately to connect ideas logically. Avoid redundancy and ensure your vocabulary is relevant and accurate.

예시: On my birthday, I usually celebrate with my friends and family at home. We organize a small party with delicious food, and we enjoy dancing together. This makes the day memorable and allows me to spend quality time with my loved ones.

제안: Your answer covers the main points but lacks clarity and has some grammatical mistakes. Try to start with a clear topic sentence and then add specific details using linking words like 'also' or 'apart from this'. Keep your sentences concise and avoid repetition to make your answer more effective.

예시: When I was younger, I celebrated my birthday with my family and friends. We usually cut a cake at home, and sometimes my friends organized summer parties at a restaurant or bar. Apart from that, we enjoyed dancing together to make the celebration more memorable.

제안: Your answer expresses your opinion well but contains some repetition and grammatical errors. Use a clear topic sentence and support it with specific reasons. Employ linking words like 'because' and 'also' correctly to connect your ideas smoothly. Try to avoid repeating words unnecessarily.

예시: Yes, I think celebrating my birthday is important because it brings family and friends together. It is a chance to meet friends I haven't seen for a long time, and we can share our experiences and memories.

제안: Your answer is honest but very brief and does not fully address the question. Try to provide a more developed response by giving a general opinion or example, even if you are unsure. This shows your ability to handle unfamiliar topics and keeps the conversation going.

예시: I am not sure about specific important birthdays in China, but I think people usually celebrate birthdays of close family members like parents or grandparents with great importance.

× On my birthday I usually celebrate it with my friends and family and at home there was there we organizing a small party where we are having a delicious food and also we also economy birthday to have to make it more memorable and also we enjoy summer ha dance with together and this is the best moment to cap to stay with our loved ones.

✓ On my birthday I usually celebrate it with my friends and family at home where we organize a small party with delicious food. We also have a birthday cake to make it more memorable, and we enjoy some dance together. This is the best moment to stay with our loved ones.

The phrase 'there was there we organizing' is incorrect because 'there was' is past tense and 'organizing' is present participle without auxiliary verb. The correct structure is 'where we organize' to indicate habitual action. Also, 'we are having a delicious food' is incorrect; 'food' is uncountable and does not need 'a'. The sentence is corrected to use present simple tense for habitual actions and proper article usage.

× On my birthday I usually celebrate it with my friends and family and at home there was there we organizing a small party where we are having a delicious food and also we also economy birthday to have to make it more memorable and also we enjoy summer ha dance with together and this is the best moment to cap to stay with our loved ones.

✓ On my birthday I usually celebrate it with my friends and family at home where we organize a small party with delicious food. We also have a birthday cake to make it more memorable, and we enjoy some dance together. This is the best moment to stay with our loved ones.

The use of 'organizing' without an auxiliary verb is incorrect. The correct form is 'we organize' for habitual actions. Also, 'enjoy summer ha dance with together' is unclear and likely a mishearing; it is corrected to 'enjoy some dance together' to make sense and use proper verb + -ing form.

× On my birthday I usually celebrate it with my friends and family and at home there was there we organizing a small party where we are having a delicious food and also we also economy birthday to have to make it more memorable and also we enjoy summer ha dance with together and this is the best moment to cap to stay with our loved ones.

✓ On my birthday I usually celebrate it with my friends and family at home where we organize a small party with delicious food. We also have a birthday cake to make it more memorable, and we enjoy some dance together. This is the best moment to stay with our loved ones.

The phrase 'a delicious food' is incorrect because 'food' is an uncountable noun and does not take the indefinite article 'a'. The correction removes 'a' and uses 'delicious food' properly.

× When I was a younger I celebrated with them with my friends and family and also we cut a cake at home and also outside also with my friends who organizes summer party at summer restaurant or we can say bar.

✓ When I was younger, I celebrated with my friends and family. We also cut a cake at home and sometimes outside with my friends who organized summer parties at a summer restaurant or bar.

The phrase 'was a younger' is incorrect; 'younger' is comparative and does not need 'a'. Also, 'organizes' should be past tense 'organized' to match the past time frame. The sentence is split for clarity and corrected for tense consistency.

× When I was a younger I celebrated with them with my friends and family and also we cut a cake at home and also outside also with my friends who organizes summer party at summer restaurant or we can say bar.

✓ When I was younger, I celebrated with my friends and family. We also cut a cake at home and sometimes outside with my friends who organized summer parties at a summer restaurant or bar.

The phrase 'at summer restaurant' is missing an article; it should be 'at a summer restaurant'. Also, 'with them with my friends' is redundant; 'with my friends and family' suffices.

× When I was a younger I celebrated with them with my friends and family and also we cut a cake at home and also outside also with my friends who organizes summer party at summer restaurant or we can say bar.

✓ When I was younger, I celebrated with my friends and family. We also cut a cake at home and sometimes outside with my friends who organized summer parties at a summer restaurant or bar.

The phrase 'or we can say bar' is informal and unclear. It is better to say 'or bar' directly without 'we can say' to maintain formal and clear expression.

× Yes, I think it is important to celebrate my birthday because I think that this is the only way to have to have a gather up of family and friends and also we can meet friends who who we have not seen yet from long time also and we can share our experience and memories together also.

✓ Yes, I think it is important to celebrate my birthday because it is the only way to gather family and friends. We can also meet friends whom we have not seen for a long time and share our experiences and memories together.

The phrase 'have to have a gather up' is incorrect; 'gather' is a verb and should not be used as a noun here. Also, 'who who we have not seen yet from long time' is incorrect; 'whom' is the correct relative pronoun and 'for a long time' is the correct prepositional phrase. The sentence is corrected for clarity and proper tense.

× Yes, I think it is important to celebrate my birthday because I think that this is the only way to have to have a gather up of family and friends and also we can meet friends who who we have not seen yet from long time also and we can share our experience and memories together also.

✓ Yes, I think it is important to celebrate my birthday because it is the only way to gather family and friends. We can also meet friends whom we have not seen for a long time and share our experiences and memories together.

The repeated 'who who' is an error. Also, 'who' should be 'whom' as it is the object of the verb 'have not seen'. The phrase 'from long time' should be 'for a long time'.

× Yes, I think it is important to celebrate my birthday because I think that this is the only way to have to have a gather up of family and friends and also we can meet friends who who we have not seen yet from long time also and we can share our experience and memories together also.

✓ Yes, I think it is important to celebrate my birthday because it is the only way to gather family and friends. We can also meet friends whom we have not seen for a long time and share our experiences and memories together.

The phrase 'our experience and memories' should be plural 'experiences' to match 'memories' and indicate multiple shared events.

× Well, I don't have such kind of information about this because I do not know about any famous personality in China.

✓ Well, I don't have that kind of information about this because I do not know any famous personalities in China.

The phrase 'such kind of information' is awkward; 'that kind of information' is more natural. Also, 'any famous personality' is better as 'any famous personalities' to indicate plural and generality.