Birthday— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is generally clear and relevant, but it contains some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that affect naturalness. Try to use more precise vocabulary and correct sentence structures. Also, avoid redundancy by combining similar ideas more smoothly. For example, instead of 'I also like to take holiday from school and relax and do something I enjoy with watching like a movie or going for a date,' you could say 'I usually take a day off school to relax by watching a movie or going on a date.'

예시: On my birthday, I usually spend time with my family. We have a small party at home where we enjoy a homemade meal and share birthday cake. I also take a day off school to relax by watching a movie or going on a date.

제안: Your answer addresses the question but has several grammatical mistakes and unclear expressions, such as 'they feed me love and special.' Try to use clearer and more natural phrases. Also, use linking words to connect ideas smoothly. For example, you could say, 'When I was young, I usually celebrated my birthday with my friends at school because I enjoyed feeling loved and special. I also distributed candies to every student.'

예시: When I was young, I usually celebrated my birthday with my friends at school because I enjoyed feeling loved and special. I also distributed candies to every student.

제안: Your answer has good ideas but lacks clarity and contains grammatical errors. Some phrases like 'Mixed day, memorable and standard relationship' are unclear. Try to express your ideas more clearly and use linking words to organize your answer. For example, you could say, 'Yes, I believe celebrating my birthday is important because it offers a special opportunity to reflect on the past year. For instance, gathering with loved ones to share a meal or exchange gifts creates memorable moments. I also enjoy receiving surprise gifts and parties.'

예시: Yes, I believe celebrating my birthday is important because it offers a special opportunity to reflect on the past year. For instance, gathering with loved ones to share a meal or exchange gifts creates memorable moments. I also enjoy receiving surprise gifts and parties.

제안: Your answer contains relevant cultural information but has grammatical errors and some unclear phrasing, such as 'the most of family celebrated typically 16th birthday.' Also, the connection between the 16th birthday and honoring elders is not very clear. Try to clarify your ideas and use linking words. For example, you could say, 'In China, many families typically celebrate the 16th birthday as a significant milestone because it marks the completion of a Zodiac cycle. Additionally, families often gather to honor their elders, showing respect and gratitude for their guidance and care.'

예시: In China, many families typically celebrate the 16th birthday as a significant milestone because it marks the completion of a Zodiac cycle. Additionally, families often gather to honor their elders, showing respect and gratitude for their guidance and care.

× We often have a small party at home where we enjoy homemade meal and share birthday cake.

✓ We often have a small party at home where we enjoy homemade meals and share birthday cake.

The word 'meal' should be plural 'meals' because it refers to food in general, which is countable in this context. Using the plural form is appropriate when talking about food items collectively.

× I also like to take holiday from school and relax and do something I enjoy with watching like a movie or going for a date.

✓ I also like to take a holiday from school and relax and do something I enjoy, like watching a movie or going on a date.

The phrase 'take holiday' requires the article 'a' to be grammatically correct. Also, 'with watching like a movie' is incorrect; it should be 'like watching a movie'. Additionally, 'going for a date' should be 'going on a date' as the correct preposition for dating activities is 'on'.

× When I was young, I usually celebrated my birthday with my friends at school.

✓ When I was young, I usually celebrated my birthday with my friends at school.

This sentence is correct in past tense and requires no correction.

× I enjoy this gathering because they feed me love and special.

✓ I enjoyed this gathering because they made me feel loved and special.

The pronoun 'they' is vague here; it refers to friends, so it's acceptable but the verb tense should be past 'enjoyed' to match 'when I was young'. Also, 'feed me love and special' is incorrect; the correct expression is 'made me feel loved and special'.

× In school, I usually distribute candies with every student.

✓ In school, I usually distribute candies to every student.

The preposition 'with' is incorrect here; it should be 'to' when giving something to someone. Also, 'candies' is acceptable but 'candy' is more common in Canadian English; however, 'candies' is not incorrect.

× It offer a special opportunity to reflect on the past year.

✓ It offers a special opportunity to reflect on the past year.

The subject 'It' is third person singular, so the verb should be 'offers' with an 's' to agree in number.

× For example, gathering with loved one to share a meal or exchange gift, Mixed day, memorable and standard relationship.

✓ For example, gathering with loved ones to share a meal or exchange gifts, making the day memorable and strengthening relationships.

The phrase 'loved one' should be plural 'loved ones' to match the context. 'Gift' should be plural 'gifts' because it refers to exchanging multiple gifts. The original sentence is fragmented and unclear; it needs restructuring for clarity.

× And I also like to receive surprise gifts and surprise party.

✓ And I also like to receive surprise gifts and have surprise parties.

The phrase 'surprise party' should be plural 'surprise parties' to match 'gifts' or rephrased. Also, 'receive surprise party' is incorrect; one 'has' or 'is given' a surprise party.

× In China, the most of family celebrated typically 16th birthday.

✓ In China, most families typically celebrate the 16th birthday.

'The most of family' is incorrect; it should be 'most families' to indicate plural. Also, 'celebrated' should be present tense 'celebrate' to match the general statement. The definite article 'the' is needed before '16th birthday'.

× The milestone is highly significant because it marks the completion of Zodiac cycle.

✓ The milestone is highly significant because it marks the completion of the Zodiac cycle.

The phrase 'Zodiac cycle' requires the definite article 'the' because it refers to a specific known cycle.