Cars— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more natural and concise: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid odd word choices and pronunciation errors (e.g. 'Family Rd.', 'big emotion sickness', 'Bombay roads'), and provide one specific supporting detail. Keep it within 1–3 sentences and use linking words if needed.

예시: Yes, I enjoyed traveling by car as a child. I loved watching the countryside change outside the window during long holiday trips, though I sometimes felt car sick on bumpy roads.

제안: Give a clear topic sentence naming the type of car you prefer, avoid filler and mispronunciations, and use precise vocabulary (e.g. 'SUVs', 'spacious interiors', 'safety features'). Add one linked reason or contrast about electric vehicles. Limit to 2–3 sentences.

예시: I prefer SUVs because of their spacious interiors and better safety features. Lately I have also become more interested in electric vehicles because they are quieter and more environmentally friendly than conventional cars.

제안: Start with a direct topic sentence and follow with one or two clear reasons using linking words (e.g. 'because', 'so'). Remove hesitations and unclear phrases ('see bad', 'seeing the race'). Keep to 1–3 polished sentences.

예시: I prefer being a passenger because it lets me relax and enjoy the view, and I can catch up on news or read. Driving in heavy traffic, on the other hand, is stressful and tiring.

제안: Use a short clear topic sentence and one specific activity with a linking word explaining why you do it. Avoid mixed metaphors and word errors ('traffic chain', 'broadcast are all'). Keep it natural and concise.

예시: When I'm stuck in a traffic jam, I usually listen to my favorite playlists or podcasts to pass the time and stay calm. It helps me stay patient and prevents me from getting frustrated.

× Definitely, I have fond memories of long Family Rd. trips during the holidays.

✓ Definitely, I have fond memories of long Family Rd trips during the holidays.

Remove the extra period after Rd and keep proper noun formatting; this fixes punctuation and maintains sentence structure. Use 'Rd' without a trailing period in this context to avoid fragmenting the abbreviation into an unintended sentence.

× I was always fascinated by the changing landscape outside the window, although I occasionally suffered from a big emotion sickness of Bombay roads.

✓ I was always fascinated by the changing landscape outside the window, although I occasionally suffered from severe motion sickness on Bombay roads.

Replace 'big emotion sickness' with 'severe motion sickness' (correct adjective and noun) and use the preposition 'on' for roads. 'Motion sickness' is the correct collocation; 'severe' more accurately describes intensity.

× I'm particularly draw so at Uvs because of their spacious interior, inter interiors, uh, interiors and safety feeders.

✓ I'm particularly drawn to SUVs because of their spacious interiors and safety features.

Use the past participle 'drawn' with 'be' (passive participle) and the correct preposition 'to'. 'UVs' is likely 'SUVs'; correct noun plural 'interiors' and 'safety features' instead of 'safety feeders'. This fixes verb form, preposition, word choice, and pluralization.

× However, I haven't recently become more interesting in electric vehicles as they are more, uh, environmentally friendly and quiet compared to traditional.

✓ However, I haven't become more interested in electric vehicles recently, as they are more environmentally friendly and quieter compared to traditional ones.

Use 'interested' (adjective) not 'interesting', place 'recently' after the verb phrase for natural word order, and use comparative 'quieter' and 'traditional ones' to complete the comparison. 'Haven't become more interested' fits the present perfect context.

× To be honest, I prefer being a passenger. It is allows me to see bad, relax and enjoy the seeing the race uh, or even catch up on some news uh, where Whereas uh, being behind the wheel and heavy traffic change can be quite stressful and exhausting.

✓ To be honest, I prefer being a passenger. It allows me to sit back, relax and enjoy the scenery, or even catch up on some news, whereas being behind the wheel in heavy traffic can be quite stressful and exhausting.

Remove the extra 'is', use 'sit back' instead of 'see bad', use 'enjoy the scenery' (correct noun) and simplify punctuation. Replace 'change' with 'traffic' and use 'in heavy traffic'. 'Whereas' should not be capitalized mid-sentence. Fixes redundant words, wrong vocabulary, and sentence flow.

× Whenever I'm stuck in a traffic chain, I usually listen to broadcast are all my favorite playlists to kill time is a great way to stay patient and prevent myself from getting frustrated of work status by the gridlock on the street.

✓ Whenever I'm stuck in a traffic jam, I usually listen to broadcasts or my favorite playlists to kill time; it's a great way to stay patient and prevent myself from getting frustrated by the gridlock on the streets.

Use 'traffic jam' not 'traffic chain', 'broadcasts' (plural) or 'playlists', correct connector 'or', and restructure clause with a semicolon for clarity. Use 'getting frustrated by' not 'of', and 'streets' is a more natural plural. This corrects prepositions, vocabulary, and sentence structure.