Traffic— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Try to make your answer more direct and clear by starting with a simple topic sentence. Use linking words to connect your ideas and avoid repeating similar points. Also, try to use more precise vocabulary and keep your answer concise within 5 sentences.

예시: There are not many crosswalks in my area. While driving, I notice that some roads have crosswalks, but others do not. This uneven distribution makes it difficult for pedestrians to cross safely. Overall, I think the number of crosswalks is insufficient in my neighborhood.

제안: Start with a clear topic sentence that directly answers the question. Use linking words to explain your reasons and provide specific details. Try to avoid redundancy and improve sentence structure for clarity.

예시: Yes, I would like to improve the number of crosswalks in my area. Many places lack enough crosswalks, which forces students to cross roads unsafely. This situation puts them at risk of accidents. Therefore, adding more crosswalks would enhance safety for pedestrians, especially children.

× In my area where I live, I don't see many crosswalks in that road and while driving in the car I see some crosswalks, but I don't know the standard of this distribution.

✓ In my area where I live, I don't see many crosswalks on that road and while driving in the car I see some crosswalks, but I don't know the standard of this distribution.

The preposition 'in' is incorrectly used with 'that road'. The correct preposition to indicate location on a road is 'on'. So, it should be 'on that road'.

× I see some places having, some places do not have.

✓ I see some places having crosswalks, while some places do not have any.

The original sentence is incomplete and lacks clarity. Adding 'crosswalks' and connecting the two clauses with 'while' improves sentence structure and clarity.

× Yes, definitely I wish to change the crosswalks because some places I find them not having enough crosswalks and many students are crossing the roads putting themselves in danger in front of the driving car.

✓ Yes, definitely I wish to change the crosswalks because in some places I find there are not enough crosswalks and many students are crossing the roads, putting themselves in danger in front of moving cars.

The phrase 'some places I find them not having enough crosswalks' is awkward and incorrect. It is better to say 'in some places I find there are not enough crosswalks'. Also, 'in front of the driving car' is unnatural; 'in front of moving cars' is more appropriate.