Hometown— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be concise and direct: start with a clear topic sentence stating your hometown, then give one or two brief, relevant details (why you live elsewhere or purpose). Avoid repetitions, filler words, and unclear words (e.g. “UMM”, “Hakka”, “by Brown”). Pronounce place names clearly and keep to 2–3 sentences.

Exemplo: I’m from Narangos, a small town in the countryside. I’ve been living in Dhaka for the past month to attend an IELTS preparation course.

Sugestão: Start with a clear topic sentence naming what you like, then add one or two specific examples using linking words (for example, because, such as). Reduce hesitation and repetition and correct small grammar errors (e.g. “they come to help you”).

Exemplo: I particularly like the people in my hometown because they are very friendly and helpful. For example, neighbours often help each other during emergencies and community events, which makes the town feel very safe.

Sugestão: Answer the time directly with a clear sentence, then give one concise reason or a specific detail. Avoid conflicting tenses or confusing chronology (you said both five years and moved when 8). Use precise phrasing (e.g. “moved here when I was eight”).

Exemplo: I have lived in Narangos for most of my life — my family moved there when I was eight. We chose the town because it has many good schools and several well-equipped hospitals.

Sugestão: Give a direct opinion first, then support it with two specific reasons using linking words (for example, because, also). Avoid repetition and finish the sentence with a concrete example or result.

Exemplo: Yes, I think it’s a great place for young people because there are many reputable primary schools and safe parks for children to play. For instance, the local primary schools have small class sizes and after-school clubs that help students learn and socialise.

× Well by Brown, I am from Narangos but now I am living in Dhaka for my IELTS course UMM.

✓ Well, I am from Narangos, but now I am living in Dhaka for my IELTS course at UMM.

The preposition 'by' is incorrect here; use no preposition or a comma to begin. Also 'in' Dhaka is fine but 'for my IELTS course UMM' needs 'at' before the institution name to show location/affiliation. Include commas to separate clauses. Suggestion: Use 'from Narangos' and 'at UMM' to show origin and place of study.

× I was UMM admitted in UMM in a IELTS coaching last month and now I'm Hakka for the IELTS exam.

✓ I was admitted to UMM for an IELTS coaching course last month, and now I'm in Dhaka for the IELTS exam.

Word order and verb patterns are incorrect. Use 'admitted to' + institution, not 'UMM admitted in UMM'. Use the article 'an' before 'IELTS' and 'coaching course' for clarity. 'Hakka' is likely a misspelling of 'Dhaka'; correct place name and use 'in Dhaka' to indicate location. Combine clauses with proper conjunction and commas. Suggestion: Use 'was admitted to UMM for an IELTS coaching course' and 'now I'm in Dhaka'.

× I like many things in my hometown, especially uh, I especially like the people in my hometown because they are very friendly.

✓ I like many things about my hometown; in particular, I especially like the people because they are very friendly.

Redundant repetition 'especially' and awkward preposition 'in my hometown' repeated. Use 'about' with 'like many things about' and avoid repeating 'especially'. Clarify pronoun reference 'they' correctly refers to 'the people'. Suggestion: Say 'I like many things about my hometown, especially the people, because they are very friendly.'

× They are so humble and whenever you fall in a danger they they are come to help you.

✓ They are so humble, and whenever you are in danger they come to help you.

Incorrect pronoun and article use: 'fall in a danger' is wrong; use 'be in danger' or 'get into danger'. Extra 'they' and wrong verb form 'are come' — use simple present 'come' for habitual action. Remove unnecessary article 'a'. Suggestion: Use 'whenever you are in danger, they come to help you'.

× So that's why I love them so much.

✓ So that's why I love them so much.

This sentence is grammatically correct. It uses the present simple to express a general feeling. No change needed.

× Uh, I have lived here for five years.

✓ Uh, I have lived here for five years.

This sentence correctly uses the present perfect to express an action that began in the past and continues to the present. No change needed.

× Umm, when I was 8 years old, my mom, uh, my parents came here to live there because, uh, there are a lot of facilities in this town.

✓ Umm, when I was 8 years old, my parents came here to live because there were a lot of facilities in that town.

Use consistent past tense: the movement 'came' is past, so the reason should use past tense 'there were'. Also 'my mom, uh, my parents' is redundant — use 'my parents'. 'Live there' is awkward when speaker refers to past move; 'to live' suffices. Use 'that town' to refer to the town mentioned earlier. Suggestion: Say 'my parents came here to live because there were a lot of facilities in that town.'

× They have, uh, uh, it has a very large, umm, amount of hospitals and, uh, very well known schools.

✓ It has a large number of hospitals and well-known schools.

Mixed subjects 'they' and 'it' cause confusion; choose 'it' for 'the town'. Use 'a large number of' (or 'many') not 'amount of' for countable nouns like 'hospitals'. Hyphenate 'well-known'. Remove filler words. Suggestion: Use 'The town has a large number of hospitals and well-known schools.'

× Yes, of course my hometown is a very good place for young people especially, especially for the people who are in a primary school.

✓ Yes, of course my hometown is a very good place for young people, especially for those who are in primary school.

Redundant 'especially, especially' and article misuse: 'in a primary school' is unnatural; use 'in primary school' or 'in a primary school' depending on context, but 'those who are in primary school' is more natural. 'The people' should be 'those' to refer to the group. Suggestion: Say 'especially for those who are in primary school.'

× Because my hometown has a lot of good schools for the primary students even it is very uh, good for, umm, good for the children who who are uh.

✓ My hometown has many good schools for primary students, so it is very good for children.

Sentence fragment started with 'Because' creates an incomplete sentence when used alone; combine into a full sentence and remove repetition 'good for, umm, good for'. Use 'many' for countable 'schools' and 'primary students' or 'children' for clarity. Remove repeated 'who'. Suggestion: Use a complete sentence: 'My hometown has many good schools for primary students, so it is very good for children.'