Hometown— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Make the answer grammatically correct, concise, and focused. Start with a clear topic sentence naming the hometown, then add one or two specific details using linking words. Avoid redundancy and incorrect phrases.

Exemplo: I come from Chengdu, the capital of Sichuan Province in southwest China. It’s famous for its relaxed pace of life and outstanding food, especially spicy dishes like mapo tofu and hotpot, which I really enjoy.

Sugestão: Give a clearer topic sentence and organize supporting points with linking words. Use specific, accurate vocabulary (e.g., ‘relax’ not ‘relax a little bit about myself’; ‘people often sit and chat’). Provide concrete examples of dishes or places and keep to 2–4 sentences.

Exemplo: What I like most is the relaxed atmosphere and the food. For example, people often sit in teahouses and chat even on weekdays, which makes the city feel friendly. Also, Chengdu’s spicy cuisine—such as mapo tofu and hotpot—uses fresh ingredients and offers a wide variety of flavors.

Sugestão: Separate the answers: first answer the length of residency clearly, then address future plans if asked. Ensure grammar is correct and avoid contradictory statements (saying you don’t want to continue but then expect to live there permanently). Be concise and give one clear reason for future plans if necessary.

Exemplo: I’ve lived in Chengdu since I was born, so for over twenty years. I don’t plan to stay there after I graduate because several members of my family are unwell and I want to move closer to better job opportunities elsewhere.

Sugestão: Start with a direct opinion sentence, then support it with specific, coherent reasons and examples. Use accurate collocations (e.g., ‘service and hospitality’ rather than ‘state and hospitality’). Include linking words like ‘for example’ or ‘also’ and be concise.

Exemplo: Yes, Chengdu is a good place for young people. For example, it offers job opportunities in the service and tech industries, and growing investment has attracted skilled professionals. As a result, graduates can find local jobs and access networking and training programs.

× My hometown is Chengdu, the capital of Sichuan province in southeastern China, is a famous for its relaxed lifestyle and delicious food, especially certain fusions such as marsh or tofu, and hotspots, which I enjoy a lot.

✓ My hometown is Chengdu, the capital of Sichuan province in southeastern China. It is famous for its relaxed lifestyle and delicious food, especially dishes like mapo tofu, and for its popular hotspots, which I enjoy a lot.

The original sentence incorrectly combines two independent clauses causing a run-on and includes wrong word choice ('marsh' instead of 'mapo') and an unnecessary article ('a famous'). Split into two sentences and correct vocabulary: 'mapo tofu' is a well-known Sichuan dish; remove 'a' before 'famous'. Suggested improvement: break complex ideas into separate sentences and check specific food names for correct spelling.

× First of all, I'd like to relax a little bit about myself.

✓ First of all, I'd like to relax a little and take some time for myself.

The phrase 'relax a little bit about myself' misuses the preposition and reflexive idea. Use 'relax a little' and add 'for myself' to indicate doing it personally. Suggestion: use common collocations like 'relax a little', 'take some time for myself'.

× Even on weekdays, people save their time saving cars and chat over a cup of tea, which creates a very friendly atmosphere.

✓ Even on weekdays, people save time by leaving their cars at home and chat over a cup of tea, which creates a very friendly atmosphere.

Incorrect collocation 'save their time saving cars' and missing agent phrase. Use 'save time by' + gerund phrase and 'leaving their cars at home' to show the action. Suggestion: use 'save time by' + verb-ing for expressing the method of saving time.

× Secondly, I love the food, especially in Chengdu's passport because of its reach, spicy food and the wide variety of fresh ingredients.

✓ Secondly, I love the food, especially in Chengdu, because of its rich spicy flavors and the wide variety of fresh ingredients.

'Chengdu's passport' is incorrect and 'reach' is a misspelling of 'rich'. The phrase should be 'in Chengdu' and 'rich spicy flavors' describes the cuisine. Suggestion: use 'rich' for abundance and avoid incorrect nouns like 'passport' when meaning 'local cuisine'.

× I have lived there since I was born so it's been more than 20 years.

✓ I have lived there since I was born, so it has been more than 20 years.

Contraction 'it's' can be acceptable but 'it has been' is clearer for present perfect continuous reference; add a comma before 'so'. Suggestion: use 'it has been' for clarity and punctuation to separate clauses.

× I don't want to continue living there after I graduate because most of my family are illness, so I expect to move and live in this city permanently.

✓ I don't want to continue living there after I graduate because most of my family are ill, so I expect to move and live in another city permanently.

'Most of my family are illness' is wrong: 'illness' is a noun; use adjective 'ill' and correct verb agreement with 'most of my family are' (family can be singular or plural; 'most of my family are' is acceptable). Also 'this city' contradicts 'move'; likely 'another city' fits intent. Suggestion: use 'ill' for health condition and ensure referent for 'move' matches the city mentioned.

× Sure, My Hometown is a great place for young people because it provides some job opportunities in world industries like state and hospitality so graduates can pursue their careers locally.

✓ Sure, my hometown is a great place for young people because it provides job opportunities in sectors such as manufacturing and hospitality, so graduates can pursue their careers locally.

Incorrect capitalization 'My Hometown' and awkward phrase 'world industries like state'. Use lowercase, replace 'some job opportunities' with 'job opportunities' and 'sectors such as manufacturing and hospitality' for clarity. Suggestion: use correct capitalization and choose appropriate industry names.

× It also attracts skilled professionals and investment, which creates more networking and training opportunities for young people.

✓ It also attracts skilled professionals and investment, creating more networking and training opportunities for young people.

Original sentence is grammatically acceptable but can be improved by using a participle clause to avoid repetition of 'which creates'. Suggestion: use 'creating' to make the sentence more concise and natural.