Chocolate— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler words, correct tense and singular/plural, and give one brief reason with a linking word. Mention allergy briefly as a consequence.

Exemplo: Yes, I like chocolate, especially dark chocolate because it has a richer, less sweet flavour. However, I rarely eat it because I have an allergy that often causes acne, so I keep my intake to a minimum.

Sugestão: Give a direct frequency statement, use correct phrases ("on a regular basis"), avoid repetition and run-on sentences. Use a linking word to explain the allergy reason concisely.

Exemplo: I eat chocolate only occasionally, usually on special occasions when I crave it, because I have an allergy so I try not to have it regularly.

Sugestão: Use past tense consistently and be more specific and succinct. Avoid repetition and vague phrases; mention consequences briefly and link them logically.

Exemplo: Yes, I ate chocolate almost every day as a child because I loved snacks. As a result, I developed digestive problems later in life, so I really regret those habits.

Sugestão: State the main reason directly, use correct grammar (e.g. "causes"), and give one or two clear supporting points with linking words. Avoid vague or repetitive language.

Exemplo: I think chocolate is popular because it stimulates the release of feel-good chemicals, so people feel happier when they eat it. In addition, its sweet taste and variety make it appealing across cultures.

Sugestão: Give a concise clear preference first, then briefly list alternatives using linking words. Avoid unclear terms like "dirty chocolate" and correct small grammar mistakes.

Exemplo: My favourite is 85% dark chocolate because it's intense and not too sweet. I also enjoy nutty and coconut chocolates, but I don't like so-called "dirty" chocolate mixes.

Sugestão: Begin with a clear opinion, then give two concise reasons with linking words. Improve grammar ("its origins", "the sweetness") and avoid repetition.

Exemplo: Yes, chocolate is a good gift because many people enjoy it, and high-quality chocolates can feel luxurious due to rare origins and unique flavours.

× Yes, I like eating chocolate, especially dark chocolate because milk chocolate does lag the taste of real chocolate so I prefer the dark one.

✓ Yes, I like eating chocolate, especially dark chocolate, because milk chocolate lessens the taste of real chocolate, so I prefer dark chocolate.

The sentence uses 'the dark one' unnecessarily and 'does lag the taste' is unnatural. Change 'does lag the taste' to 'lessens the taste' (verb choice) and use 'dark chocolate' instead of 'the dark one' for clarity. Also add a comma before 'because' for readability.

× However, I don't eat them regularly because I'm kind of allergic to it.

✓ However, I don't eat chocolate regularly because I'm somewhat allergic to it.

Mismatch between plural 'them' and singular 'chocolate' and vague 'kind of'. Use 'chocolate' (uncountable) and 'somewhat' for formal register; maintain pronoun 'it' to refer to chocolate.

× Whenever I eat it, I got acne from it and so I keep it to the minimum.

✓ Whenever I eat it, I get acne from it, so I keep my consumption to a minimum.

Mix of present tense ('eat') with past tense 'got' is inconsistent. Use present simple 'get' for habitual result. Also 'keep it to the minimum' is unnatural; use 'keep my consumption to a minimum'.

× Umm, I prefer to eat them occasionally when there is a special occasion on where I crave it, but in a regular basis or to eat them regularly as a snack is not the the ultimate thing to do or the right thing to do.

✓ I prefer to eat chocolate occasionally for special occasions when I crave it, but eating it regularly as a snack is not a good idea.

Problems: 'them' with uncountable 'chocolate', unnecessary 'on where', incorrect phrase 'in a regular basis' (should be 'on a regular basis' or 'regularly'), and wordy ending. Simplify to 'eat chocolate occasionally' and 'eating it regularly as a snack is not a good idea'.

× Because I have allergy.

✓ Because I have an allergy.

Missing article before 'allergy'. Use 'an allergy' or 'allergies' depending on meaning.

× Umm, I eat them in a regular basis, like everyday even.

✓ I used to eat them on a regular basis, like every day.

Talking about past habit requires 'used to' or past tense. Also use 'on a regular basis' not 'in a regular basis', and 'every day' is two words.

× And that caused a lot, a lot of problem to my stomach because now I'm suffering from colon and stomach issues and digestive issues.

✓ And that caused a lot of problems for my stomach because now I'm suffering from colon, stomach, and digestive issues.

'A lot, a lot of problem' should be plural 'a lot of problems' and preposition should be 'for my stomach' or 'in my stomach'. Also list illnesses in parallel with commas.

× I believe chocolate is popular around the world because eating it causing the happiness hormone to rise, so it makes people happy when they eat it and the fun that comes with it.

✓ I believe chocolate is popular around the world because eating it causes the happiness hormone to rise, so it makes people feel happy and enjoy themselves.

'Eating it causing' is incorrect form. Use 'eating it causes' (subject-verb). 'Makes people happy when they eat it and the fun that comes with it' is awkward; rephrase to 'makes people feel happy and enjoy themselves.'

× The sweetest of it also is addictive.

✓ Its sweetness can also be addictive.

'The sweetest of it' is ungrammatical. Use noun 'sweetness' and natural phrasing 'can be addictive.'

× So yeah, it caused people to be more or happier in the long run.

✓ So yeah, it can make people feel happier in the long run.

'It caused people to be more or happier' is ungrammatical. Use modal 'can' for general truth and 'feel happier' is natural.

× I prefer 85% plain dark chocolate.

✓ I prefer 85% dark chocolate.

'Plain dark chocolate' is redundant; '85% dark chocolate' is concise and clear.

× However I prefer some tastes as well like halal nut chocolate and coconut chocolate.

✓ However, I also enjoy flavored varieties such as halal nut chocolate and coconut chocolate.

'Prefer some tastes' is awkward; use 'enjoy flavored varieties' or 'also like'. Add comma after 'However'.

× Dirty chocolate is not in my favorite list however it's a very popular.

✓ 'Dirty chocolate' is not among my favorites; however, it is very popular.

Use 'among my favorites' and separate clauses with semicolon or period. 'It's a very popular' missing noun; use 'it is very popular.'

× But yeah these are my favorite.

✓ But yeah, these are my favorites.

Pluralize 'favorite' to 'favorites' and add comma after 'But yeah'.

× Yes, chocolate can make a great gift especially for people who love chocolate and chocolate gifts can be luxurious because there are a lot of types of chocolate that are very expensive because it's origins and the sweetest of it is can be very rare for some brands.

✓ Yes, chocolate can make a great gift, especially for people who love it, and chocolate gifts can be luxurious because some types of chocolate are very expensive due to their origins, and their sweetness can be rare for some brands.

Problems: repetitive 'chocolate', incorrect 'it's origins' (should be 'their origins'), awkward 'the sweetest of it is can be very rare'. Rephrase to correct pronouns, possessive forms, and grammar: 'some types... are very expensive due to their origins' and 'their sweetness can be rare.'

× So yes it can be a good.

✓ So yes, it can be a good gift.

Sentence incomplete: 'a good' requires a noun. Add 'gift' and comma after 'So yes.'