Singing— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: 문장이 자연스럽고 명확하도록 발화와 문법을 정리하세요. 주제문으로 바로 답한 뒤 이유를 1~2개의 구체적 근거로 연결하고, 중복 표현(예: "so I I'm so shy", "another people")과 불필요한 반복을 제거하세요. 또한 문장을 최대 5문장 이내로 유지하고 연결어(such as, because, so, but)를 적절히 사용해 흐름을 매끄럽게 하세요.

Exemplo: Yes, I enjoy singing because it helps me relieve stress. However, I feel shy performing in front of other people, so I usually sing only at home. Singing alone lets me relax and practise without pressure.

Sugestão: 문법(현재완료와 과거형 사용)과 어순을 바로잡으세요. 불필요한 음성적 끊김(umm)을 줄이고, 학습 방법을 구체적으로 설명해 보세요. 또한 연결어를 이용해 이유와 방법을 명확히 연결하면 더 자연스럽습니다.

Exemplo: Yes, I have learned some singing techniques from YouTube videos because I wanted to improve my vocal skills. For example, I followed tutorials on breathing exercises and pitch control to practise regularly.

Sugestão: 답변은 주제문(누구를 위해 노래하느냐)에 직접 응답한 뒤 이유를 간결하게 제시하세요. 문법 오류('another people'→'other people', 'really stress'→'really stressful' 등)를 고치고, 문장을 완성하세요. 중복된 내용(즐기는 이유와 수치심)을 한 번만 명확히 설명하세요.

Exemplo: Actually, I don't usually sing for other people; I sing for myself because it helps me relax and enjoy the moment. I feel too shy to perform in front of others, so I prefer private practice at home.

Sugestão: 의견을 먼저 말한 뒤 구체적인 이유나 예시로 뒷받침하세요. 불필요한 음성적 표현(uh, umm)과 미완성 문장을 제거하고, 장르를 예로 들 때는 연결어로 이유를 명확히 제시하세요. 문장을 3개 이내로 간결하게 유지하세요.

Exemplo: Yes, I think singing can make people happier because music often lifts the mood and reduces stress. For example, when I need energy I play my favourite songs, such as hip hop or K-pop, and singing along helps me feel more positive.

× Yes, I like singing because it makes me free of stress, but I was so I I'm so shy singing in front of another people so I sing in my home only.

✓ Yes, I like singing because it relieves my stress, but I am too shy to sing in front of other people, so I only sing at home.

The sentence mixes past and present tenses and has several grammatical issues. 'was so I I'm so shy' is incorrect tense and redundant; use present 'I am too shy'. 'Makes me free of stress' is awkward; use 'relieves my stress'. 'Another people' is incorrect; use 'other people'. 'I sing in my home only' should be 'I only sing at home' for correct word order and preposition. Suggestion: keep consistent present tense, use correct prepositions and plural form for 'people'.

× Yes I have learn how to sing umm in the YouTube video UMM because I want to improve my singing skill so I searched the how to sing in the YouTube.

✓ Yes, I have learned how to sing from YouTube videos because I wanted to improve my singing skills, so I searched 'how to sing' on YouTube.

Present perfect requires past participle: 'have learned' not 'have learn'. Use plural 'videos' and preposition 'from' or 'on YouTube'. 'I want to' should match tense with 'have learned' but can be past 'wanted' if referring to past action; here use past for searching: 'so I searched'. Also 'singing skill' is better as plural 'singing skills'. Suggestion: use correct past participle, correct prepositions ('on' or 'from'), and plural nouns when appropriate.

× Actually, I don't want to sing for another people. I only sing for me because I enjoy singing and it makes me relax and really stress. But uh, I don't like singing in front of another people because.

✓ Actually, I don't want to sing for other people. I only sing for myself because I enjoy singing and it helps me relax and reduces stress. But I don't like singing in front of other people.

Use 'other people' not 'another people'. 'Sing for me' is unnatural; use 'sing for myself'. 'Makes me relax and really stress' is incorrect: use 'helps me relax' and 'reduces stress'. Ending the sentence with 'because.' is incomplete; remove or complete the clause. Suggestion: correct pronouns and prepositions, use verbs that collocate properly (help relax, reduce stress).

× Yes, of course. I think singing can bring happiness to people because uh, when I feel calm and I want to get some energy, I tap my music app and I listen to my favorite music umm such as hip hop or K pop. Because it is.

✓ Yes, of course. I think singing can bring happiness to people because when I want to feel calm or get some energy, I open my music app and listen to my favorite music, such as hip hop or K-pop.

'When I feel calm and I want to get some energy' is awkward; combine appropriately. 'Tap my music app' is informal; 'open my music app' is clearer. Use 'listen to' not 'I listen my'. 'K pop' should be 'K-pop'. The final fragment 'Because it is.' is incomplete and should be removed. Suggestion: remove incomplete fragments, use correct verb+preposition collocations and hyphenation for genres.