Hobby— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Улучшите грамматику и согласование форм глаголов, а также используйте более естественные и сжатые фразы. Начните с основной темы, затем добавьте 1–2 конкретных детали, используя связки (for example, because). Избегайте повторов и лишних слов. Например: используйте 'play computer games' → 'playing computer games', 'listen music' → 'listening to music', 'after busy day at school' → 'after a busy day at school'.

Exemplo: Yes, I have several hobbies, including reading, playing computer games and listening to music. For example, I play in a band and we write simple songs together, which helps me relax after a busy day at school.

Sugestão: Исправьте грамматические ошибки и порядок слов, уточняйте идеи и убирайте тавтологию. Начните с простого предложения о хобби в детстве, затем приведите конкретный пример и объяснение. Исправьте 'hobby'→'hobbies', 'interesting about'→'interested in'.

Exemplo: Yes, I had several hobbies as a child; one of my favourites was drawing. I was also very interested in the history of ancient Egypt because I loved learning about pyramids and pharaohs.

Sugestão: Сформулируйте мысль ясно: назовите хобби и скажите, с какого возраста вы им занимаетесь, затем добавьте одно специфическое подтверждение. Избегайте бессвязных фраз и неправильных форм. Например, 'I have enjoyed town science childhood' — непонятно; используйте 'I have enjoyed drawing since childhood' или 'I've been interested in ancient Egypt since I was a child'.

Exemplo: Yes, I have had a hobby since childhood: drawing. I have been drawing since I was six and I still practise regularly to improve my skills by copying pictures and studying techniques.

Sugestão: Улучшите связность и порядок слов, используйте союзы и точные фразы. Начните с общей темы, затем перечислите 1–2 совместных хобби и опишите, как вы их проводите, избегая повторы ('around around'). Например, 'watching films' и 'cooking at weekends' — правильные формы.

Exemplo: Yes, I share some hobbies with my family. For example, we like watching films together and cooking at the weekends. After a busy day my mother and I often take a walk around our neighbourhood to relax.

× Yes, I have several hobbies such as reading, play computer games and listen music.

✓ Yes, I have several hobbies such as reading, playing computer games and listening to music.

The sentence lists hobbies, which require the gerund (-ing) form after 'such as'. Use 'playing' and 'listening' instead of base verbs, and include the preposition 'to' with 'listening to music'. Also add commas for clarity.

× For instance, I really enjoy playing music.

✓ For instance, I really enjoy playing music.

This sentence is correct. 'Enjoy' is followed by the gerund 'playing', which is appropriate. No change needed.

× I can make music with my band, so I find that having hobbies helps me relax after busy day at school.

✓ I can make music with my band, so I find that having hobbies helps me relax after a busy day at school.

The noun phrase 'busy day' needs the indefinite article 'a'. Without the article the noun phrase is ungrammatical.

× Yes, I had several hobby as a child and one of my favorite was drawing and I'm also interesting about history of Egypt.

✓ Yes, I had several hobbies as a child and one of my favorites was drawing, and I was also interested in the history of Egypt.

'Hobby' should be plural 'hobbies' to match 'several'. 'Favorite' should be plural 'favorites' when referring to one of several. 'Interesting' is an adjective describing something, but the student needs the past participle 'interested' to describe their feeling. Also use 'in the history of Egypt' with preposition 'in' and article 'the'.

× It's really interesting it's.

✓ It was really interesting.

The original repeats and misorders words. Use a single clear clause 'It was really interesting' to state past interest.

× Yes, I have enjoyed town science childhood.

✓ Yes, I have enjoyed science since childhood.

The phrase 'town science childhood' is ungrammatical. Likely intended meaning is 'science since childhood'. Use present perfect 'have enjoyed' with 'since' to indicate a starting point in the past continuing to now.

× I enjoy great picture and improve my skills.

✓ I enjoy drawing pictures and improving my skills.

'Great picture' is incorrect for expressing the activity; use the verb 'drawing' plus plural 'pictures'. Maintain parallel gerund forms: 'drawing pictures and improving my skills'.

× I was also very interesting in the history of ancient Egypt.

✓ I was also very interested in the history of ancient Egypt.

Use 'interested' (past participle/adjective) to describe the student's past feeling, not 'interesting' which describes something that causes interest.

× So it's it was.

✓ So it was.

The original repeats pronouns and verbs. Simplify to 'So it was.' which is grammatically correct.

× Yes, I share some hobbies with my family such as watching film and cooking for weekends uh and after busy day me with my mom walking around around apartment so we really enjoy.

✓ Yes, I share some hobbies with my family, such as watching films and cooking on weekends, and after a busy day my mom and I walk around the apartment, so we really enjoy it.

Multiple issues: 'watching film' should be 'watching films' or 'watching a film' (plural fits general hobby). Use 'on weekends' not 'for weekends'. Insert article 'a' in 'a busy day'. Pronoun order should be 'my mom and I' for subject. Remove repeated 'around' and add 'it' at the end for clarity. Also add commas to separate clauses.