Walking— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid repeating phrases and correct tense/grammar errors (e.g., "gives" not "give", "it also gives me an opportunity"). Use linking words like "for example" or "because" to connect ideas.

Exemplo: Yes, I walk a lot because I find it helps my health and energy. For example, I go for a 30-minute walk every morning before work, which relaxes me and helps me stay focused during long shifts as a food service supervisor.

Sugestão: Begin with a direct answer and keep sentences short. Use correct verb forms ("helped" not "helps") and articles ("to the park" -> "to the park"). Provide one clear example and a linking phrase like "because" or "so" to explain why it became a habit.

Exemplo: Yes, I often went for walks as a child. I used to go to the park with friends to play games, which helped me develop the habit of walking in the mornings or evenings to stay fit.

Sugestão: Answer directly and avoid repetition. Use accurate collocations ("reduce stress and anxiety", "take a short break"). Include one clear example and a linking word such as "for example" or "because" to support your idea.

Exemplo: People often walk in parks to relax and unwind after a busy day, because green spaces reduce stress. For example, office workers might take a short walk in a nearby park during lunch to lower stress and improve their mood.

Sugestão: Start with a clear topic sentence naming the place, then add one or two vivid, specific details. Use complete sentences and correct grammar ("it would definitely" not "it it will"). Link ideas with "because" or "as" to explain benefits.

Exemplo: I would like to take a long walk along the Riverside in Saskatoon because the river views and birdsong are very peaceful. Walking there would help me relax and reduce anxiety after a stressful week.

Sugestão: Be precise and avoid vague or fragmented sentences. Use correct expressions ("next to my building", "beautifully cultivated flowers"). Provide one or two specific details about what you did or saw and use linking words like "for example" or "because".

Exemplo: I recently went to the park next to my building, which is popular with families. For example, I sat on a bench and enjoyed the beautifully cultivated flowerbeds and relaxed with a friend.

× Yes, I do walk a lot because it's quite good for the health as it is my habit to go for a walk in the early mornings which give me a relaxation and energy to perform my task more efficiently throughout the day.

✓ Yes, I walk a lot because it's quite good for health, and it is my habit to go for a walk in the early mornings, which gives me relaxation and energy to perform my tasks more efficiently throughout the day.

Errors: incorrect use of 'do walk' (unnecessary emphatic present), incorrect article 'the health', subject-verb agreement 'which give'. Suggestions: Use simple present 'I walk' for habitual actions, omit 'the' before 'health' when speaking generally, and use 'gives' to agree with the singular relative pronoun 'which'. Also pluralize 'task' to 'tasks' or rephrase as 'my task' depending on meaning.

× And I work as a food service supervisor in the restaurant.

✓ I work as a food service supervisor in a restaurant.

Errors: unnecessary conjunction 'And' at sentence start, and incorrect article 'the' before 'restaurant' when speaking generally. Suggestions: Start with the subject and use 'a restaurant' unless a specific restaurant was previously mentioned.

× I also give me opportunity.

✓ It also gives me opportunities.

Errors: sentence lacks correct subject and verb structure; 'I also give me opportunity' is ungrammatical. Suggestions: Use 'It gives me opportunities' or 'It also gives me an opportunity' depending on singular/plural meaning; include a clear subject ('It') referencing the activity.

× As far as I remember, I was a very energetic and jubilant child and I used to go with my friends in park to walk and play different sort of games, which also helps me to build a habit of going to the walk mainly in evenings or early mornings to stay healthy and fit.

✓ As far as I remember, I was a very energetic and joyful child and I used to go to the park with my friends to walk and play different sorts of games, which also helped me to build the habit of walking mainly in the evenings or early mornings to stay healthy and fit.

Errors: 'jubilant' is formal/awkward; incorrect preposition order 'go with my friends in park'; tense inconsistency 'used to' (past) followed by 'helps' (present); 'going to the walk' is incorrect. Suggestions: Use 'joyful' or 'happy', 'go to the park with my friends', keep past tense consistently with 'helped', and say 'the habit of walking' or 'going for walks'.

× I believe people like to walk in parks to relax themselves after spending a whole day in a hectic schedule.

✓ I believe people like to walk in parks to relax after spending a whole day with a hectic schedule.

Errors: unnecessary reflexive 'themselves' and slightly odd preposition 'in a hectic schedule'. Suggestions: Drop 'themselves' for natural phrasing and use 'with' or 'in' a hectic day; 'after spending a whole day with a hectic schedule' is clearer.

× For example, the workers enjoy having a short break in walking in near parks to reduce the stress level and anxiety from their life, which also lowers and anxiety and boosts well-being.

✓ For example, workers enjoy taking a short walk in nearby parks to reduce stress and anxiety, which also boosts their well-being.

Errors: 'having a short break in walking' is awkward, incorrect preposition 'in near parks', redundancy 'the stress level and anxiety', typo 'and anxiety', missing possessive 'their well-being'. Suggestions: Use 'taking a short walk' or 'having a short break', 'nearby parks', simplify to 'reduce stress and anxiety', and use 'their well-being'.

× I would definitely prefer to go to the Riverside in Saskatoon which gives a mesmerizing view of river with a lot of birds chirping around.

✓ I would definitely prefer to go to the riverside in Saskatoon, which offers a mesmerizing view of the river with many birds chirping around.

Errors: unnecessary capitalization 'Riverside', missing commas, article errors 'view of river' and word choice 'gives' vs 'offers', 'a lot of' informal. Suggestions: Use lowercase 'riverside' unless a proper name, add comma before relative clause, use 'the river', and 'many birds' or 'lots of birds'.

× Gives a sense of satisfaction and relaxation.

✓ It gives a sense of satisfaction and relaxation.

Errors: sentence fragment missing subject 'It'. Suggestions: Add subject 'It' to form a complete sentence.

× It it will definitely reduce the anxiety and boost my overall well-being of mind.

✓ It will definitely reduce anxiety and boost my overall mental well-being.

Errors: duplicated 'It it', mix of 'will' (future) after conditional 'would' contextually but acceptable; awkward phrase 'well-being of mind'. Suggestions: Remove duplication, use 'anxiety' without 'the' for general sense, and use 'mental well-being'.

× I recently went to the park that is beside my building.

✓ I recently went to the park beside my building.

Errors: 'that is beside' is wordy; tense 'recently went' is fine. Suggestions: Use concise relative phrase 'the park beside my building' or 'the park next to my building'.

× It is so alluring for the people who want to spend time with family and friends.

✓ It is very appealing to people who want to spend time with family and friends.

Errors: 'so alluring for the people' is awkward; preposition 'for' vs 'to'. Suggestions: Use 'appealing to people' or 'attractive for people' and 'very' instead of 'so' in formal speech.

× I love to go there and relax myself and grab the mesmerizing view of the flowers that is cultivated over there by the local people.

✓ I love to go there to relax and enjoy the mesmerizing view of the flowers that are cultivated there by local people.

Errors: reflexive 'relax myself' is unnecessary, 'grab the view' is incorrect verb choice, subject-verb agreement 'flowers that is' should be 'are'. Suggestions: Use 'relax' without 'myself', 'enjoy the view', and plural verb 'are' to agree with 'flowers'.

× It is so. It is wealth.

✓ It is wonderful; it feels like a treasure.

Errors: fragments 'It is so.' and 'It is wealth.' are unclear and ungrammatical. Suggestions: Replace with clear complete sentences that convey meaning, e.g., 'It is wonderful' or 'It feels like a treasure'.