Bike— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and correct grammar; start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific details. Remove fillers (uh, umm) and fix tense and pronoun errors. Use linking words to connect ideas (for example, because, so).

Exemplo: Yes. I had a pink-and-yellow bike that my father bought me for my birthday because I had asked for one as a present. It was my favorite toy and I loved riding it around the neighborhood with my friends.

Sugestão: Give a clearer topic sentence and support it with specific reasons and one example. Avoid repetition and refine vocabulary (e.g., 'older people' rather than 'old people', 'commute' instead of 'reach their destinations'). Use a linking word to organise the reasons.

Exemplo: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country. For example, many people — both older adults and young commuters — use bicycles to commute because cycling is cheaper and helps them keep fit. In some cities there are also bike lanes and rental schemes that make cycling convenient.

× Yes, when I was a child my dad, uh, had bought me a pink and yellow bike and it this is because it was my birthday and I asked for it as a gift.

✓ Yes, when I was a child my dad bought me a pink and yellow bike because it was my birthday and I had asked for it as a gift.

The original sentence used past perfect 'had bought' and then mixed tense with 'asked' and awkward 'it this is because'. Use simple past 'bought' to describe a past event and past perfect 'had asked' only if you need to show an action before another past action. Here, 'I had asked for it' can remain to show the request happened before receiving the bike, but simpler 'I asked for it' fits conversational past. Also remove 'it this is because' and replace with 'because' for clarity. Suggestion: Use simple past for sequential past events ('bought', 'asked') or use past perfect only to show an earlier past when necessary.

× Umm. So thankfully he gives it to me.

✓ Umm. So thankfully he gave it to me.

The sentence uses present tense 'gives' while referring to a past event. Use simple past 'gave' to match the time frame of the story ('when I was a child'). Suggestion: Match verb tense to the time reference; use past tense when narrating past events.

× Yes, I do think they are popular and that's mainly because old people and young people try to reach their destinations using bikes instead of riding their cars because everyone is trying to maintain a good health.

✓ Yes, I do think they are popular, and that's mainly because older people and young people try to reach their destinations using bikes instead of driving their cars, since everyone is trying to maintain good health.

Multiple issues: 'old people' is better expressed as 'older people' (word choice/adjective form) and 'riding their cars' is incorrect collocation; use 'driving their cars'. 'A good health' is uncountable and should be 'good health' without an article. Also add a comma before 'and' for readability and replace the second 'because' with 'since' to avoid repetition. Ensure verbs 'try' and 'are trying' are consistent; present simple 'try' suits habitual actions and 'are trying' can remain for ongoing trends; here keeping 'are trying' as 'since everyone is trying' is acceptable.