Birthday— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Your answer is a bit unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to make your sentences simpler and more direct. Avoid redundancy and focus on clear expression. Use linking words to connect your ideas logically.

Exemplo: Usually, I hold a big party to celebrate my birthday, which I really enjoy. However, recently I prefer to donate money to poor people instead of spending it on a party. This makes me feel relaxed and happy because I receive many blessings in return.

Sugestão: Your answer has good content but needs clearer structure and grammar. Use a topic sentence, then add specific details with linking words. Avoid filler words and repetition to make your answer more natural and effective.

Exemplo: When I was young, I liked to celebrate my birthday with family and friends. My parents usually held a big party, and I felt very excited. After cutting the cake, we danced, had dinner, and took many pictures. I really enjoyed the warm and friendly atmosphere.

Sugestão: Your answer is confusing and contains grammatical mistakes. Make sure to clearly state your opinion first, then explain with specific reasons using linking words. Avoid contradictory statements and unclear phrases.

Exemplo: No, I don't think it is very important for me to celebrate my birthday. Instead, I prefer to donate money to people in need. This way, I feel happy and blessed, which is more meaningful to me than having a big party.

Sugestão: Your answer lacks clarity and has grammatical errors. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add specific reasons and examples using linking words. Avoid repetition and unclear phrases to improve coherence.

Exemplo: I think my parents' birthdays are the most important to celebrate in China. I want to make their special days memorable. For example, my mother likes to celebrate her birthday abroad, but I prefer to celebrate it here in China to honor our traditions.

× Usually I have hold a grand party that I really enjoy the most, but nowadays I am quite stingy because I prefer to spend the money on poor people rather than to wasted it by holding a party and got A and got a blessing a lot in turn off it and I felt very relaxed and comfortable when I did such type of activities.

✓ Usually I hold a grand party that I really enjoy the most, but nowadays I am quite stingy because I prefer to spend the money on poor people rather than waste it by holding a party. I get a lot of blessings in return and I feel very relaxed and comfortable when I do such activities.

The phrase 'have hold' is incorrect; the correct form is 'hold' for habitual actions in present tense. 'To wasted' should be 'waste' because after 'rather than' the base form of the verb is used. 'Got A and got a blessing a lot in turn off it' is unclear and grammatically incorrect; it is corrected to 'get a lot of blessings in return' to convey the intended meaning. Also, tense consistency is maintained by using present tense verbs for habitual actions.

× When I was a young I, I really like to celebrate a word with my family and friends for such purpose.

✓ When I was young, I really liked to celebrate the world with my family and friends for such a purpose.

The phrase 'a young' is incorrect; 'young' is an adjective and does not need an article here. 'Like' should be in past tense 'liked' to match 'When I was young'. 'Celebrate a word' is likely a mishearing or typo; assuming 'celebrate the world' or 'celebrate a word' is intended, but 'celebrate the world' is used here. 'For such purpose' needs an article 'a' to be grammatically correct.

× My parents hold a grand party for me and I feel very ex felt very excited on that day.

✓ My parents held a grand party for me and I felt very excited on that day.

The verb 'hold' should be in past tense 'held' to match the past time frame. 'Feel' should be 'felt' to maintain past tense consistency. 'Ex felt' appears to be a typo and is corrected to 'felt'.

× And uh, after that I cut the cake and did uh, dancing and dinner, dancing and clicking up pictures and I really enjoy such a friendly and family atmospheres also.

✓ After that, I cut the cake, danced, had dinner, and took pictures. I really enjoy such a friendly and family atmosphere.

The sentence is run-on and uses 'and' excessively. 'Did dancing and dinner, dancing and clicking up pictures' is awkward and incorrect; corrected to 'danced, had dinner, and took pictures'. 'Atmospheres' should be singular 'atmosphere' to match the context. Also, 'enjoy' is present tense, which is acceptable if referring to general feelings.

× No, I didn't think, I don't think so. That is quite significant for me to celebrate by Monday.

✓ No, I don't think so. It is not very significant for me to celebrate on Monday.

'Didn't think' is past tense and conflicts with 'don't think' present tense; the past tense is removed for clarity. 'Celebrate by Monday' is incorrect preposition usage; 'on Monday' is correct. Also, 'quite significant' is changed to 'not very significant' to match the intended negative meaning.

× Nowadays I prefer to given a monies to a needy people rather than to wasted it by holding a grand party.

✓ Nowadays I prefer to give money to needy people rather than waste it by holding a grand party.

'Prefer to given' is incorrect; the base form 'give' should be used after 'prefer to'. 'A monies' is incorrect; 'money' is uncountable and does not take 'a'. 'A needy people' is incorrect; 'needy people' without 'a' is correct. 'To wasted' should be 'waste' after 'rather than'.

× In this way I got a lot of blessings which which make me more comfortable and delighted and I enjoy a lot.

✓ In this way, I get a lot of blessings which make me more comfortable and delighted, and I enjoy it a lot.

'Got' is past tense; 'get' is used to maintain present tense consistency. The repeated 'which which' is a typo. 'Make' should agree with plural 'blessings'. 'Enjoy a lot' is incomplete; 'enjoy it a lot' clarifies the object.

× Well, I feel that it was one, it is one of my parents birthday that is quite significant to be celebrated in China because I want to make their days become a memorable and one of and my mother always want to celebrate their birthday in a foreign country.

✓ Well, I feel that one of my parents' birthdays is quite significant to be celebrated in China because I want to make their day memorable. My mother always wants to celebrate her birthday in a foreign country.

'It was one, it is one of my parents birthday' is confusing; corrected to 'one of my parents' birthdays is'. Possessive apostrophe added in 'parents''. 'Days become a memorable' is incorrect; corrected to 'day memorable'. 'One of and my mother always want' is fragmented; separated into two sentences. 'Mother always want' corrected to 'mother always wants' for subject-verb agreement.

× So I prefer to use prefer to choose China to celebrate their birthday there.

✓ So I prefer to choose China to celebrate their birthday there.

The phrase 'use prefer to choose' is redundant; 'prefer to choose' is sufficient. The sentence is simplified for clarity.