Birthday— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains grammatical errors. To improve, try to use simple and correct sentences, avoid repetition, and organise your ideas logically. Use linking words like 'firstly', 'then', and 'also' to connect your points. Keep your answer within 5 sentences and be specific about your activities.

Exemplo: On my birthday, I usually get dressed in my favourite outfit. Then, I check with my father if he has ordered the cake. I also take pictures of the cake to remember the day. Many guests come to our home, and we celebrate together. Overall, I enjoy spending time with my family and friends on my birthday.

Sugestão: Your answer is repetitive and lacks clarity. To improve, directly answer the question about your childhood birthdays, avoid repeating phrases, and use past tense correctly. Add specific details about what you did and use linking words to make your answer coherent.

Exemplo: When I was young, I used to celebrate my birthday with my family and friends. We played games and enjoyed delicious food together. I especially liked chatting and playing with my cousins. Many guests would come to our home, making the day lively and fun. Those birthdays were very special to me.

Sugestão: Your answer has good ideas but is a bit long and unclear. To improve, use shorter sentences, correct grammar, and clearly explain why celebrating birthdays is important. Use linking words like 'because' and 'also' to connect your ideas logically.

Exemplo: I think celebrating birthdays is very important because it brings family and relatives together. We get to spend quality time and strengthen our relationships. Also, I enjoy cutting the cake and sharing happiness with everyone. Birthdays create joyful memories for me.

Sugestão: Your answer is repetitive and a bit confusing. To improve, clearly state your opinion and avoid repeating phrases. Use linking words to organise your ideas and provide specific reasons why everyone’s birthday is important to celebrate.

Exemplo: I believe that everyone’s birthday is important to celebrate in China. It is a special day to spend quality time with family and loved ones. Especially for children, birthdays are joyful occasions that bring happiness. Therefore, I think all birthdays deserve celebration with love and joy.

× Firstly, I I get ready and I wore dress with my choice.

✓ Firstly, I get ready and I wear a dress of my choice.

The sentence mixes present tense 'get ready' with past tense 'wore'. Since the context is about usual activities, present tense should be used consistently. Also, 'wore' is past tense; 'wear' is the correct present tense form here.

× I talk to my father that word cake have you ordered and I just click the pictures of that cake.

✓ I ask my father if he has ordered the cake and I just click pictures of that cake.

The phrase 'talk to my father that word cake have you ordered' is incorrect. The correct expression is 'ask my father if he has ordered the cake'. Also, 'click the pictures' is better as 'click pictures' in this context.

× there are a lot of guests who comes at my home with them.

✓ there are a lot of guests who come to my home with them.

The subject 'guests' is plural, so the verb should be 'come' not 'comes'. Also, the correct preposition is 'to my home' not 'at my home'.

× I I do a lot of activities. So I think these kind.

✓ I do a lot of activities. So I think these are the kind of things I do.

The sentence 'So I think these kind.' is incomplete and unclear. It needs to be restructured to convey the intended meaning clearly.

× When you were young, when I was young, when I was young at that time, I do a lot of things.

✓ When I was young, I did a lot of things.

The sentence incorrectly uses present tense 'do' when referring to past time 'when I was young'. The verb should be in past tense 'did'.

× there are a lot of guests who comes at our home and.

✓ there are a lot of guests who come to our home.

The plural subject 'guests' requires the plural verb 'come' instead of 'comes'. Also, 'to our home' is the correct preposition.

× I do chatting apart from them, I play a lot of games with them

✓ I chat with them, and I play a lot of games with them

The phrase 'do chatting apart from them' is incorrect. The correct expression is 'chat with them'.

× For me to celebrate a birthday is very crucial because as it is also a source of gathering people and where people where relatives and members of my home get together so at that time we spend quality time.

✓ For me, celebrating a birthday is very important because it is also a way to gather people, where relatives and members of my home get together, and we spend quality time.

The sentence has awkward pronoun use and structure. 'For me to celebrate a birthday' is better as 'For me, celebrating a birthday'. Also, 'source of gathering people' is better expressed as 'a way to gather people'.

× Apart from this I love to celebrate my birthday with cutting a cake and also.

✓ Apart from this, I love to celebrate my birthday by cutting a cake as well.

The sentence is incomplete and awkward. 'With cutting a cake' should be 'by cutting a cake'. The sentence needs completion for clarity.

× each and every person should celebrate their birthday with their family members and then near and dear once the kids at that time they get to they get they get to spend most most of the quality time with them.

✓ Each and every person should celebrate their birthday with their family members and near and dear ones. At that time, the kids get to spend most of the quality time with them.

The sentence has repeated words and unclear pronoun references. 'Near and dear once' should be 'near and dear ones'. The phrase 'they get to they get they get to' is repetitive and incorrect.

× So I think these each and everyone has right to celebrate their birthday with full of happiness and joy.

✓ So I think each and every one has the right to celebrate their birthday with full happiness and joy.

The sentence structure is awkward. 'These each and everyone' is incorrect; it should be 'each and every one'. Also, 'with full of happiness' should be 'with full happiness'.