Coins— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be more concise and fluent: remove filler words (uh, um), use one clear reason and one brief supporting detail. Begin with a direct topic sentence, then add a linked supporting point using a linking word (for example, because/so). Keep to 2–3 sentences.

Exemplo: No, I rarely use coins these days because they are bulky and noisy. For example, I usually pay with my debit card or mobile phone apps because they are faster and more convenient.

Sugestão: Answer directly and give a specific reason with a linking word. Avoid repetition and fillers, and limit to two sentences: one opinion and one supporting detail or example.

Exemplo: Not really — coins are inconvenient because they are heavy and easy to lose. I prefer mobile payments or a debit card, which are quicker and more secure.

Sugestão: Give a clear, direct answer and clarify the meaning (weird phrase ‘packet mirror’ is unclear). Use one sentence saying whether you collected coins, then add a brief reason or memory with specific detail and no fillers.

Exemplo: No, I didn’t collect coins as a child because my parents usually bought what I needed and they didn’t give me pocket money. I remember spending most of my free time playing rather than saving money.

Sugestão: Start with a direct statement (yes/no), then give a balanced reason using a linking word (however/although/because). Remove fillers and avoid repeating the same point twice; give one clear example of when coins are needed.

Exemplo: I don't usually carry coins; however, I do keep a few because some small shops and vendors only accept cash. For instance, I keep a few coins for street food stalls or bus fares.

× They make a lot of noise, so I prefer to uh purchase by debit card and uh also I always use my uh uh cell phones uh to pay uh.

✓ They make a lot of noise, so I prefer to purchase with a debit card and I always use my cell phone to pay.

The original uses plural 'cell phones' with singular subject 'I' and awkward preposition 'by'. Use 'cell phone' singular when referring to the device you personally use, and use the correct preposition 'with' or 'using'. Also remove extraneous fillers. Improve subject-verb agreement and preposition choice.

× To be honest with you, no, it's not really uh comfortable to uh, use coins.

✓ To be honest, no, it's really not comfortable to use coins.

The adverb 'really' should modify the adjective 'comfortable' and is typically placed before it: 'really not comfortable'. Also remove conversational filler 'with you' and extra commas for cleaner written style.

× I prefer to use my cell phones uh and install lots of apps for payment uh or using uh uh debit card uh rather than uh, using coins.

✓ I prefer to use my cell phone and install lots of payment apps or use a debit card rather than use coins.

Preposition and verb forms were inconsistent: 'for payment' is better as 'payment apps', and 'using debit card' should be 'use a debit card'. Keep parallel structure in the list: 'use my cell phone, install apps, or use a debit card'.

× Have you collected coins when you were a kid?

✓ Did you collect coins when you were a kid?

When asking about a past period with 'when you were a kid', use the simple past 'Did you collect' rather than present perfect 'Have you collected', which is used for unspecified time up to now.

× No, I remember that when I was a child, we didn't have a lot of coins, Uh, and our parents always, uh, uh, bought lots of things for us and uh, they didn't allow us to have a allowance or packet mirror.

✓ No, I remember that when I was a child, we didn't have a lot of coins, and our parents always bought a lot of things for us and they didn't give us an allowance or pocket money.

Pronoun use was okay but there were article and word choice errors: 'a allowance' should be 'an allowance', and 'packet mirror' is incorrect—likely 'pocket money' or 'allowance'. Also remove fillers and repetitive commas.

× Uh, although I know carrying coins is really important because uh, some shops uh don't have access to uh digital payment.

✓ Although I know carrying coins is really important because some shops don't accept digital payment.

Use 'accept' rather than 'have access to' when referring to shops' ability to take digital payments. This corrects the verb collocation and clarifies meaning.

× So we have to pay for them by coins or cash and I don't like to carry them because they made a lot of noise Uh, they cumbersome, produce lots of noise.

✓ So we have to pay with coins or cash, and I don't like to carry them because they make a lot of noise and are cumbersome.

Correct plural agreement: 'they made' should be 'they make' (present tense habitual), and awkward phrasing 'they cumbersome' must be 'they are cumbersome'. Also use 'pay with coins' not 'pay for them by coins'.