Travelling— Part 1 Báo cáo

Gợi ý: 문법과 발음 오류를 줄이고 문장을 더 자연스럽게 연결하세요. 예를 들어 대문자·어순·관사 사용(look out of the window → look out the window 또는 look out of the window), listen to music처럼 전치사 포함, 그리고 ‘healing’ 대신 ‘relaxing’ 같은 더 자연스러운 표현을 사용하세요. 또한 주제문(Yes, I do.)을 먼저 말한 뒤 이유와 구체적 예를 linking word(so, because, and)로 연결해 2~3문장으로 구성하세요.

Ví dụ: Yes, I do. I enjoy looking out the window because I like to watch the changing weather and sky, which I find very relaxing. I often listen to music while watching, so it helps me unwind during long journeys.

Gợi ý: 의미 전달이 불명확한 문장을 정리하고 이유를 구체적으로 제시하세요. 현재 문장은 어순과 연결어가 어색하고 일부 단어가 잘못 사용됐습니다('focus on my. Thin at the moment' 불명확). 'I prefer to remember it with my eyes because...' 형태로 간결하게 말한 뒤 구체적 이유(예: 사진이 방해가 된다, 순간의 느낌을 더 잘 기억함)를 덧붙이세요.

Ví dụ: No, I usually don't. I prefer to remember the view with my own eyes because taking photos can be distracting, and I find that I notice more details when I simply watch without using my phone.

Gợi ý: 문장을 더 자연스럽고 정확하게 구성하세요. ‘the sea is the place that I can swim in’ 대신 ‘I prefer the sea because I can swim there’처럼 간결한 표현을 쓰고, ‘wave sound and make. Bode Song’은 의미가 불분명하므로 ‘the sound of the waves is calming’ 등으로 정리하세요. 또한 이유를 2개 정도 제시하되 linking word(because, and, so)를 사용해 연결하세요.

Ví dụ: I prefer the sea because I can swim there and the sound of the waves is very calming. Also, I like the fresh ocean air, which helps me relax and forget about everyday stress.

× Yes, I enjoy Look Out the Window because I like to see the weather and sky.

✓ Yes, I enjoy looking out the window because I like to see the weather and the sky.

'Enjoy' is followed by a verb+ing form (gerund), so 'look' should be 'looking'. Also 'out the window' is idiomatically 'looking out the window' and 'the sky' needs the definite article. Suggestion: use 'enjoy' + verb-ing and include articles where needed.

× It's very healing to me and I love to listen the music and watch out.

✓ It's very healing to me, and I love to listen to music and look out (the window).

'Listen' requires the preposition 'to' when followed by a noun: 'listen to music'. 'Watch out' means 'be careful' and is incorrect here; use 'look out' or 'look out the window'. Also 'the music' can be general 'music'. Suggestion: use correct prepositions with 'listen' and the correct verb phrase 'look out'.

× No, I like memorizing the scene, my own eyes and I want to focus on my. Thin at the moment.

✓ No, I like memorizing the scene with my own eyes, and I want to focus on the things at the moment.

The original has broken sentence structure and missing prepositions. 'Memorizing the scene with my own eyes' uses 'with' to indicate instrument. 'Focus on my. Thin' appears to be intended as 'focus on things' — 'things' is a general noun. Also 'my' before a noun needs that noun; use 'the things' or 'things'. Suggestion: keep one complete sentence, use 'with' to show how you memorize, and use correct nouns.

× I prefer the sea because the sea is the place that I can swim in and enjoy the wave sound and make.

✓ I prefer the sea because the sea is the place where I can swim and enjoy the sound of the waves.

'The place where' is the correct relative clause; 'swim in' can be simplified to 'swim'. 'Wave sound' is unnatural; use 'the sound of the waves'. Also remove the stray 'make'. Suggestion: use 'where' for places and natural noun phrases like 'the sound of the waves'.

× Bode Song.

✓ It calms me like a song.

Original 'Bode Song' is unclear and likely a mistranslation. To express that the waves sound soothing, use a clear English phrase such as 'It calms me like a song' or 'It sounds like a song'. Suggestion: choose an idiomatic expression to convey the intended meaning.