Travelling— Part 1 Báo cáo

Gợi ý: Be more concise and correct minor grammar mistakes. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition (e.g. "one of those people" and "usually always"), and correct article/word choice errors ("the surrounding around me" → "my surroundings").

Ví dụ: Yes, I do. I enjoy looking out of the window because it helps me notice local life and landscapes. For example, when I travel by bus I like watching rural villages and people going about their day, which gives me a sense of the country. I also prefer observing scenes rather than using my phone.

Gợi ý: Good structure and clear reasons. Improve by combining sentences with linking words for greater fluency and by using slightly more precise vocabulary (e.g. "reflection and glare" → "reflections and glare from the window glass"). Keep it concise and avoid small hesitations.

Ví dụ: Usually I don't, because reflections and glare from the window spoil the photo. However, if there's a beautiful sunset or a sudden heavy downpour that makes the scene dramatic, I'll often take a picture to capture it.

Gợi ý: Provide a clearer topic sentence (e.g. "I like both equally"), then give two distinct specific reasons using linking words (e.g. "on the one hand... on the other hand..."). Reduce fillers ("uh", repeated words) and correct small phrasing errors ("go to with my partner" → "go with my partner").

Ví dụ: I like both equally. On the one hand, I enjoy the mountains because I can hike there with my brother when the weather is warm, which I find very refreshing. On the other hand, I like the sea because I relax on the beach and read while my partner swims.

× I'm not one of the of those people that sit on the phone, I'm the one that usually always look at the surrounding around me.

✓ I'm not one of those people who sit on their phones; I'm the one who usually always looks at the surroundings around me.

Pronoun and relative clause errors: 'one of the of those' has an extra 'of'. Use 'one of those people who' not 'that' for people. Pronoun agreement: 'sit on the phone' should be 'sit on their phones' to match plural antecedent 'people'. Subject-verb agreement: 'I'm the one that usually always look' should be 'looks' because the subject 'the one' is singular. 'Surrounding' should be plural 'surroundings' or 'the surroundings around me' for natural phrasing. Suggestion: remove the extra 'of', use 'who' for people, match pronouns to their antecedents, and ensure verb agrees with singular subject.

× I love to listen also to people while I'm sitting in the car or at the bus.

✓ I also love to listen to people while I'm sitting in the car or on the bus.

Preposition and adverb placement with pronoun-like structure: 'listen also to people' is awkward; 'I also love to listen to people' is natural. Use 'on the bus' not 'at the bus'. Suggestion: place 'also' before the verb phrase and use correct preposition 'on' for bus.

× Usually I don't because I don't like the glare and the reflection that comes from the car's window, but if there is a beautiful sunset, I'll always take a picture.

✓ Usually I don't because I don't like the glare and the reflection that come from the car window, but if there is a beautiful sunset, I'll always take a picture.

Subject-verb agreement with compound subject: 'glare and the reflection' is plural, so use 'come' not 'comes'. Also 'car's window' is less natural than 'car window'. Suggestion: match verb number to subject and prefer 'car window'.

× Or if the sky suddenly opens and it falls with very heavy rain, then it makes the picture also more dramatic and I love that.

✓ If the sky suddenly opens and very heavy rain falls, it makes the picture more dramatic, and I love that.

Word order and verb placement: 'it falls with very heavy rain' is incorrect; 'very heavy rain falls' or 'it rains very heavily' are natural. 'Then' is unnecessary; place 'also' properly or omit. Suggestion: use natural collocations 'rain falls' or 'it rains heavily' and place modifiers correctly.

× I would say it's 5050.

✓ I would say it's fifty-fifty.

Style and clarity: '5050' written as numerals is informal and unclear in speech transcription; use 'fifty-fifty' to express equal preference. Suggestion: write out common expressions in words for clarity.

× I enjoy the mountains when it's sunny and it's warm and I like to hike.

✓ I enjoy the mountains when it's sunny and warm, and I like to hike.

Redundancy and conjunction punctuation: 'it's sunny and it's warm' is repetitive; 'sunny and warm' is concise. Add a comma before 'and' to separate clauses. Suggestion: combine adjectives to streamline the sentence.

× Uh, usually I hike with my brother and I really, really love it.

✓ Usually I hike with my brother, and I really, really love it.

Minor filler removal and punctuation: remove filler 'Uh' in written form and add a comma before 'and' to connect independent clauses. Suggestion: omit fillers in writing and punctuate compound sentences.

× And the sea. Usually I go to with my partner.

✓ And as for the sea, I usually go with my partner.

Preposition and sentence fragment: 'I go to with my partner' is missing an object after 'to' and the sentence is fragmented. Use 'I usually go with my partner' or 'I go to the sea with my partner'. Suggestion: complete the verb phrase by including the destination or remove the unnecessary 'to'.

× He's really, he really loves to go swimming.

✓ He really loves to go swimming.

Redundancy and pronoun repetition: 'He's really, he really loves' repeats the subject unnecessarily. Combine into a single clause. Suggestion: remove repetition for clarity.

× I'm more of a laid back girl sitting on the beach reading a book.

✓ I'm more of a laid-back girl, sitting on the beach reading a book.

Compound adjective and punctuation: 'laid back' should be hyphenated as 'laid-back' when used before a noun. Add a comma to separate the descriptive phrase. Suggestion: hyphenate compound adjectives and punctuate nonrestrictive phrases.