Birthday— Part 1 Báo cáo

Gợi ý: Be clearer and more grammatical: open with a direct topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct verb forms and pronouns, avoid repetition, and keep it within 3–4 sentences.

Ví dụ: I usually spend my birthday with close family and a few good friends. For example, last year my boyfriend surprised me with a trip to the Jungfrau in Switzerland, which I had wanted to visit for a long time. That made the celebration very special and memorable.

Gợi ý: Use correct tenses and concise structure: start with a clear past-tense topic sentence, then add specific details in past tense with linking words. Remove fillers like 'umm' and avoid redundant phrases.

Ví dụ: When I was young, I usually celebrated my birthday with my family. My mother would take me to pick out a cake, and sometimes my parents organised a party at home so I could invite friends. I loved those celebrations because we played games and ate together.

Gợi ý: Be direct and concise: start with a clear opinion sentence, then support with 1–2 specific reasons using linking words. Eliminate hesitations and repetitive fragments, and correct singular/plural forms.

Ví dụ: I don't think big parties are necessary; I prefer spending my birthday quietly with close family or my partner. This is because I value meaningful time with people who truly care about me rather than celebrating with a large group.

Gợi ý: Answer the question directly and avoid trailing off: acknowledge uncertainty briefly, then give a clear example from your culture. Use precise vocabulary ('turning 21' or '21st birthday') and finish your idea with a full sentence explaining the meaning of the gift.

Ví dụ: I don't know much about China, but in Malaysia the 21st birthday is often the most important because it marks adulthood. For example, on my 21st birthday my mother gave me a gold necklace with a key pendant to symbolise independence and new responsibilities.

× On my birthday, I usually love spending time with my loved ones such as my family member, my best friends or my or with my boyfriend.

✓ On my birthday, I usually love spending time with my loved ones such as my family members, my best friends, or my boyfriend.

The noun 'family member' should be plural 'family members' to match 'loved ones' and the list. Also remove the duplicated 'or' and ensure parallel items in the list. Use commas to separate items for clarity. Suggestion: keep list items in the same number form and remove extra words.

× Last birthday she bring me to the top of the Europe Yang Fraule in Switzerland that I always wanted to visit for a long time, which make this trip very special.

✓ Last birthday she brought me to the top of the Europe Yang Fraule in Switzerland, which I had always wanted to visit for a long time, which made this trip very special.

The verb 'bring' needs past tense 'brought' for third-person singular in past events (Grammar ID 2 and 5). Also 'make' should be past 'made'. 'I always wanted' should be 'I had always wanted' to show the desire existed before the trip. Ensure tense consistency for a past event. Suggestion: use past simple or past perfect for events before another past action.

× When I was young, I always celebrating my birthday with my family members.

✓ When I was young, I always celebrated my birthday with my family members.

After 'always' in past habitual actions, use the past simple 'celebrated' rather than the present participle 'celebrating'. The sentence describes habitual past behavior, so past simple is appropriate. Suggestion: use 'always' + past simple for repeated actions in the past.

× So my mom will bring me to choose a cake that I love and then sometime umm in some year, my family members will throw a birthday party for me so that I can invite my friends to come over to my house and celebrate my birthday together.

✓ My mom would take me to choose a cake that I loved, and sometimes my family members would throw a birthday party for me so that I could invite my friends to come over to my house and celebrate together.

The context describes past habitual actions, not future events, so 'will' is incorrect. Use 'would' and past forms 'loved' and 'could' to show habitual past actions. Also remove filler words and redundant phrasing for clarity. Suggestion: match modal verbs and verb forms to the past habitual context (would + base or past forms).

× Well, to me, I prefer not to throw a big party, instead I really prefer to spend time with my loved one like my family members or my boyfriend.

✓ Well, to me, I prefer not to throw a big party; instead, I really prefer to spend time with my loved ones like my family members or my boyfriend.

Use the plural pronoun 'loved ones' to match 'family members' and 'my boyfriend' (a group reference). Also punctuation improved (semicolon) and 'instead' set off with commas. Maintain plural consistency when referring to more than one person. Suggestion: use plural pronouns when referencing multiple people and improve punctuation for readability.

× So that umm so that uh so I would means that like birthdays, parties, spending time with this precious one because they are the one who care for me instead of just spending with a group of people.

✓ I mean that birthdays, parties, and spending time with these precious people matter to me because they are the ones who care for me, rather than spending time with a large group of people.

The original contains disfluencies and mixed structures ('so that... so I would means that') and incorrect agreement ('this precious one' vs 'these precious people', 'they are the one' should be 'they are the ones'). Clean up to a clear declarative sentence, correct pronoun-number agreement, and parallel list structure. Suggestion: remove fillers, use parallel structure for lists, and ensure subject-pronoun agreement.

× Well, I'm not sure about China, but in my home country Malaysia, 21st policy is the most important birthday to celebrate because it's usually symbolized independence.

✓ Well, I'm not sure about China, but in my home country Malaysia, the 21st birthday is the most important to celebrate because it usually symbolizes independence.

'21st policy' is incorrect—should be '21st birthday'. Add the definite article 'the' for a specific ordinal birthday. 'Is usually symbolized independence' is passive and ungrammatical; better to say 'it usually symbolizes independence'. This fixes quantifier/article usage and verb form. Suggestion: use correct noun phrases ('the 21st birthday') and active verb forms ('symbolizes').

× So for example, in my 21st birthday, my mother gave me a gold necklace with the with the pendant of the key.

✓ For example, on my 21st birthday, my mother gave me a gold necklace with a key-shaped pendant.

Use preposition 'on' with days and specific birthdays ('on my 21st birthday'). Remove duplicated 'with the' and use concise noun phrase 'key-shaped pendant' rather than awkward 'pendant of the key'. Suggestion: use 'on' for dates/occasions and concise adjective-noun phrases.

× So which means that I am able to.

✓ It meant that I would be able to do more on my own.

The original is a sentence fragment without a complete verb phrase ('So which means that I am able to.'), leaving the thought unfinished. Provide a completed idea in past tense to match prior context: 'It meant that I would be able to...'. Clarify what 'able to' refers to; here an example completion is given. Suggestion: avoid sentence fragments; ensure each sentence has a subject and finite verb and complete idea.