工作— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Your answer provides relevant information but is somewhat disorganised and contains many fillers such as 'you know' and 'uh'. To improve, try to give a clear and concise response with fewer hesitations and a more natural flow. Also, avoid repeating similar information and focus on a direct answer with supporting details.

示例: I am currently taking a break from work after more than ten years of experience in management. I have been the CEO of a startup company and also led an investment bank, which gave me valuable leadership skills.

建议: Your answer is incomplete and contains repetition and hesitations. To improve, respond directly to the question with a clear topic sentence, then add specific details using linking words to make your answer coherent and complete.

示例: I have worked in two main roles: as the CEO of a startup company and as a leader in an investment bank. These experiences helped me develop strong team management skills and a deep understanding of business operations.

建议: Your answer addresses the question but is filled with hesitations and lacks specific examples. To improve, avoid fillers and provide clear reasons with linking words to explain why the places were good to work.

示例: Both workplaces were good because they helped me develop different skills. For example, as a CEO, I gained valuable leadership experience, while the investment bank role improved my interpersonal skills.

建议: Your answer is somewhat repetitive and contains many fillers. To improve, give a clear preference with reasons, use linking words to connect ideas, and avoid unnecessary repetition.

示例: I preferred working as a CEO because it allowed me to develop leadership and team management skills. Additionally, it improved my interpersonal relationships and boosted my confidence.

建议: Your answer shows enthusiasm but is incomplete and contains hesitations and repetitions. To improve, complete your thoughts clearly, avoid fillers, and use linking words to explain your plans and motivations.

示例: I am planning to establish a new international company that connects Chinese innovation with the global market. This venture will fill a market gap and fulfil my dream of promoting innovation worldwide.

× I have worked more than 10 years and, uh, you know, I had a rich experience about management.

✓ I have worked for more than 10 years and, uh, you know, I have had rich experience in management.

The sentence mixes present perfect ('have worked') with simple past ('had'). To maintain consistency and correctness, 'have had' (present perfect) should be used to indicate experience up to now. Also, 'for' is needed with durations, and 'experience in management' is the correct prepositional phrase.

× I had been, uh, have been a CEO of a new startup company and the leader of the investment bank.

✓ I have been a CEO of a new startup company and the leader of an investment bank.

The sentence incorrectly combines past perfect ('had been') and present perfect ('have been'). Present perfect 'have been' is appropriate here to indicate past roles relevant to the present. Also, 'an investment bank' is more natural than 'the investment bank' unless a specific bank is meant.

× I had two types of working experience, 1 is a as a CEO of a new stop company and the other one is as a leader of investment investment bank.

✓ I have two types of work experience: one is as a CEO of a new startup company and the other is as a leader of an investment bank.

'Working experience' should be 'work experience'. '1 is a as a CEO' is incorrect; it should be 'one is as a CEO'. 'Stop company' is likely a typo for 'startup company'. 'Investment investment bank' repeats 'investment' and should be 'an investment bank'. Present tense 'have' fits better here.

× So I really accumulated the rich experiences.

✓ So I really accumulated rich experience.

'Experience' is an uncountable noun and should not be pluralised as 'experiences' in this context.

× It's about, you know, team management and.

✓ It's about, you know, team management.

The sentence ends abruptly with 'and' without completing the thought, which is a sentence structure error.

× I think both places are good to work because they developed my different skills.

✓ I think both places are good to work because they developed my different skills.

No correction needed here; sentence is grammatically correct.

× One job as a CEO, uh, I think I really accumulated the rich leadership experience and the other one, uh, really, uh, provide me the experience of interactions.

✓ One job as a CEO, uh, I think I really accumulated rich leadership experience and the other one really provided me with experience of interactions.

The verb 'provide' should be in past tense 'provided' to match the past context. Also, 'provided me with' is the correct collocation.

× Would you like the place where you work?

✓ Do you like the place where you work?

'Would you like' implies a hypothetical or polite request, but the question is about preference, so 'Do you like' is more appropriate.

× And to be honest, I preferred the job of the CEO because as CEO I really accumulated the, you know, the leadership and the many team management skills.

✓ And to be honest, I prefer the job of the CEO because as CEO I have really accumulated leadership and many team management skills.

'Preferred' is past tense but the speaker is expressing a current preference, so present tense 'prefer' is correct. Also, 'the many team management skills' should be 'many team management skills' without 'the'.

× Additionally, it also shaped me the interpersonal, you know, interpersonal relationship skills and boost my confidence in.

✓ Additionally, it also helped me develop interpersonal relationship skills and boosted my confidence.

'Shaped me the interpersonal' is incorrect; 'helped me develop' is better. 'Boost' should be past tense 'boosted' to match the past context. The sentence ends abruptly and is corrected accordingly.

× Recently, I'm planning for, uh, establishing my new company.

✓ Recently, I'm planning to establish my new company.

The verb 'planning' is followed by 'to' + base verb, not 'for' + gerund. So 'planning to establish' is correct.

× It is it will be an international platform which connects, connects the Chinese innovation and global market.

✓ It will be an international platform which connects Chinese innovation with the global market.

'It is it will be' is redundant; 'It will be' suffices. Also, 'connects the Chinese innovation and global market' should be 'connects Chinese innovation with the global market' for correct preposition and article use.

× I think it, it will fill the gap of the market and it's really about my dream to.

✓ I think it will fill a gap in the market and it's really my dream to do so.

The sentence is incomplete and awkward. 'Fill the gap of the market' should be 'fill a gap in the market'. The ending 'it's really about my dream to' is incomplete and corrected to 'it's really my dream to do so'.