工作— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Your answer is generally clear but could be more concise and natural. Avoid redundancy and grammatical errors such as "I obtain" which should be "I obtained". Also, try to limit your response to around 4-5 sentences and use linking words to improve coherence.

示例: I graduated with a bachelor's degree in computer science two years ago, and since then, I have been working as a Software Compliance Officer at Virgin Landmarks. It's a great workplace because it promotes a healthy environment and values diversity and inclusion.

建议: Your answer is relevant and clear but slightly repetitive regarding the positive environment. Try to combine ideas using linking words to make your answer more coherent and avoid repeating the same points.

示例: I work at Virgin Landmarks, a real estate company specializing in land acquisition and development. It is a great place to work because it fosters a healthy environment that encourages diversity, inclusion, and equal rights.

建议: There is a pronunciation or spelling error with "sliding landmarks" which should be "Virgin Landmarks." Also, avoid short, incomplete sentences like "it's was my dream." Use linking words to connect ideas and provide more specific details.

示例: Yes, Virgin Landmarks is a great place to work because it allows me to apply my skills and knowledge, especially in technology. In fact, working here has fulfilled a long-held dream of mine.

建议: Your answer is positive but contains incomplete sentences and awkward phrasing such as "I would love to. Catapult to managerial roles." Try to express your ideas in complete sentences and use linking words to connect your thoughts smoothly.

示例: Definitely, I love working here because the company supports growth and professional development. In the future, I hope to advance to managerial roles within the organisation.

建议: Your answer has some grammatical errors and unclear phrasing, such as "certifications that you enable me get to managerial roles." Try to clarify your intentions and use linking words to make your answer more coherent and natural.

示例: My future plan is to develop myself professionally by obtaining certifications that will help me reach managerial positions. Meanwhile, I also aim to support and help others as I grow in my career.

× Currently, I work as I obtain my bachelor's degree in computer science two years ago.

✓ Currently, I work as I obtained my bachelor's degree in computer science two years ago.

The sentence refers to an event that happened two years ago, so the past tense 'obtained' should be used instead of the present tense 'obtain'. This ensures correct temporal reference.

× In fact, it's was my dream.

✓ In fact, it was my dream.

The phrase 'it's was' is incorrect because 'it's' is a contraction of 'it is' or 'it has', which cannot be followed by 'was'. The correct form is simply 'it was' to indicate past tense.

× Definitely, I love the place where I work because it supports growth and professional development. In the future, I would love to. Catapult to managerial roles.

✓ Definitely, I love the place where I work because it supports growth and professional development. In the future, I would love to catapult to managerial roles.

The sentence is fragmented with a period separating 'I would love to' and 'Catapult to managerial roles'. These should be combined into one sentence for clarity and grammatical correctness.

× My future work plan is to develop myself professionally and certifications that you enable me get to managerial roles.

✓ My future work plan is to develop myself professionally and obtain certifications that will enable me to get to managerial roles.

The original sentence is ungrammatical and unclear. 'Certifications that you enable me get' is incorrect; it should be 'obtain certifications that will enable me to get'. This correction clarifies the intended meaning and corrects verb usage and sentence structure.