工作— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Try to avoid filler words like 'Umm' and be more precise with your vocabulary. Also, clarify your field of study correctly (it seems you meant 'criminology' instead of 'chronology'). Keep your answer concise and directly relevant.

示例: I'm currently a full-time student at Gwentland Polytechnic University, where I study criminology. Additionally, I work part-time as a housekeeper in a hotel.

建议: Avoid filler words like 'UMM' and use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly. Also, be more specific about the location and your feelings to make your answer more engaging.

示例: I work in downtown Vancouver near English Bay, which is close to the water and surrounded by many restaurants. Because of this, I really enjoy relaxing there after my work hours.

建议: Your answer is good but could be improved by using linking words to connect ideas and by varying vocabulary to avoid repetition, such as replacing 'beautiful' with synonyms.

示例: Yes, I believe it's a great place to work because I meet many people from around the world. Since they visit Vancouver for its stunning environment and pleasant weather, I also get to learn about their diverse cultures and religions.

建议: Avoid filler words like 'uh' and try to use linking words to make your answer more coherent. Also, be more specific about the experiences you've gained to enrich your response.

示例: Yes, I really like my current workplace because I have made many friends and meet new people every day. Moreover, since this is my first job, I have gained valuable experience in customer service and teamwork.

建议: Try to use linking words to connect your ideas and correct minor grammar issues. Also, be more specific about your career goals to make your answer clearer.

示例: Since I'm currently studying criminology, I would like to work in Canada's criminal justice system. Specifically, I hope to become a lawyer or work in another role within the legal system.

× I'm currently a full time student at Gwentland Polytechnic University. I study chronology there. Umm. In addition to that I am a part time worker.

✓ I'm currently a full-time student at Gwentland Polytechnic University. I study criminology there. Umm. In addition to that I am a part-time worker.

The word 'full time' and 'part time' should be hyphenated when used as adjectives before a noun, so 'full-time' and 'part-time' are correct. Also, 'chronology' is incorrect in this context; the correct term is 'criminology', which is the study of crime and criminals, fitting the context of the student's future plans.

× I work in downtown Vancouver near English Bay, UMM.

✓ I work downtown Vancouver near English Bay, UMM.

The preposition 'in' is unnecessary before 'downtown Vancouver' because 'downtown' is used as an adverbial phrase indicating location. Saying 'I work downtown Vancouver' is more natural and grammatically correct.

× It is located near water and there are a lot of restaurants nearby.

✓ It is located near the water and there are a lot of restaurants nearby.

When referring to a specific body of water known to both speaker and listener, the definite article 'the' is required before 'water'. Hence, 'near the water' is correct.

× I really enjoy sitting there after my work hours.

✓ I really enjoy sitting there after my working hours.

The phrase 'work hours' is less natural than 'working hours' when referring to the hours during which one works. 'Working hours' is the correct adjective-noun combination.

× They visit Vancouver to see its beautiful environment and beautiful weather, so I also learn more about their different culture and their religion.

✓ They visit Vancouver to see its beautiful environment and beautiful weather, so I also learn more about their different cultures and religions.

When referring to multiple people from different backgrounds, the plural forms 'cultures' and 'religions' should be used instead of singular 'culture' and 'religion' to correctly represent diversity.

× Yes, I really like the place where I work currently.

✓ Yes, I really like the place where I currently work.

The adverb 'currently' is better placed before the verb 'work' to maintain natural English word order.

× I'm really looking forward to either be a lawyer or work in legal system of Canada.

✓ I'm really looking forward to either being a lawyer or working in the legal system of Canada.

After the phrase 'looking forward to', a gerund (-ing form) is required. Therefore, 'being' and 'working' are correct instead of 'be' and 'work'. Also, 'the legal system' requires the definite article 'the'.