耐心— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be direct with a clear topic sentence, correct grammar, and concise supporting detail. Avoid redundancy and keep within 2–4 sentences. Use linking words (e.g., but, however, so) and fix common errors: article use (“a patient person”), prepositions, and collocations (“get along with people”).

示例: I wouldn't call myself a very patient person, but I try to avoid conflicts and get along with everyone in my social circle. However, when disagreements arise I usually step back and calm the situation rather than argue.

建议: Start with a clear topic sentence and give a specific reason and brief example. Remove filler words (uh, um) and correct phrasing (e.g., “yelling at me annoys me” instead of “in generally annoys me”). Use a linking word to connect cause and effect.

示例: I feel impatient when people shout at me, because it makes me anxious and distracted. For example, if a colleague raises their voice during a meeting, I find it hard to focus and respond calmly.

建议: Give a concise topic sentence about your feeling, then one or two specific supporting points. Avoid run-on sentences and correct awkward phrases (“make a habit of doing something long-term”, “self-reflection”). Use linking words like therefore, so, and as a result.

示例: If I have to do something for a long time, I try to see it as an opportunity to build discipline. For example, I started a daily reading habit last year, and as a result I can concentrate for longer periods and feel more patient.

建议: Provide a clear topic sentence, correct vocabulary errors (e.g., “digital advertising” is fine but avoid "long riding companions"; use “long-running campaigns”), and give a specific example with correct word order. Keep it concise and logical with linking words.

示例: Yes. In digital advertising my job requires patience because I manage long-running campaigns. For example, I test different creatives and wait several weeks for performance data, so I need to be patient and persistent while optimizing.

建议: Answer directly, use correct comparative forms and tenses (e.g., “less patient” not “last patient”), and provide one specific reason or example. Remove hesitations and simplify structure to two sentences max.

示例: Yes, I am more patient now than when I was a child. As I grew up I learned to control my reactions and improved my social relationships, which helped me become calmer and more tolerant.

× Well, wouldn't say that I'm patient person, but I mostly try to avoid conflicts and in generally make a major friend with everyone at my social circle.

✓ Well, I wouldn't say that I'm a patient person, but I mostly try to avoid conflicts and generally make friends with everyone in my social circle.

Errors: missing indefinite article before 'patient person' and incorrect phrases 'in generally', 'make a major friend', 'at my social circle'. Use 'a patient person' for singular countable noun (article error, type 22). 'Generally' is the correct adverb form (type 13). 'Make friends' is the correct collocation meaning become friendly with people. Use 'in my social circle' rather than 'at'. Suggestion: add 'a', replace 'in generally' with 'generally', change to 'make friends' and 'in my social circle'.

× Uh, well, probably this is uh, when people are yelling at me essentially it makes me feel impatient and in generally annoys me.

✓ Uh, well, it's probably when people are yelling at me; it essentially makes me feel impatient and generally annoys me.

Errors: awkward structure and adverb placement. 'This is when' should be 'it's probably when' (type 27). 'In generally' is incorrect; use 'generally' (type 13). Added a semicolon to separate clauses and adjusted word order for clarity. Suggestion: use 'it's probably when' and 'generally annoys me'.

× Well, over the last years, umm, I have been trying to umm, make a habit of doing something at a long term to improve my discipline and in generally just introduce with self realization at the same time, uh, which will help me to focus more and in generally, uh, become more patient than it was before.

✓ Well, over the last few years I have been trying to make a habit of doing things long term to improve my discipline and generally to develop self-awareness at the same time, which has helped me focus more and generally become more patient than before.

Errors: 'over the last years' needs 'few' or 'the last few years' (article/quantifier type 14). 'Make a habit of doing something at a long term' is incorrect phrasing; use 'make a habit of doing things long term' (type 26 sentence structure). 'Introduce with self realization' is incorrect collocation; use 'develop self-awareness' (type 13). 'Which will help me ... become more patient than it was before' has tense/reference problems; change to 'which has helped me ... become more patient than before' to match present perfect continuous context (type 6). Suggestions: use 'the last few years', use clearer collocations like 'develop self-awareness', and keep tense consistent.

× Yes, my role in a digital advertising industry requires a great deal of patience because I often manage long riding companions.

✓ Yes, my role in the digital advertising industry requires a great deal of patience because I often manage long-running campaigns.

Errors: 'a digital advertising industry' should be 'the digital advertising industry' (article error, type 22). 'Long riding companions' is incorrect vocabulary and collocation; correct phrase is 'long-running campaigns' (type 13). Suggestion: use 'the' for industries and correct compound adjectives 'long-running'.

× For example, I test different at creatives and wait for performance data which take can take several weeks.

✓ For example, I test different creatives and wait for performance data, which can take several weeks.

Errors: extraneous 'at' before 'creatives' (type 26 sentence structure) and word order 'take can take' is incorrect (type 26). Also missing comma before the non-restrictive clause (type 26). Suggestion: remove 'at', keep 'which can take several weeks' and add a comma.

× So I need to be patient and persistent while I optimize.

✓ So I need to be patient and persistent while I optimize campaigns.

Error: sentence is grammatically acceptable but lacks object; adding 'campaigns' makes it clearer and matches context (type 26). Suggestion: include the object being optimized for clarity.

× Well, I would say when I was a kid, I was last patient that I, uh, that I am now because of my behavior and probably as I grow up, I was becoming more calm person, essentially improving my social relationships.

✓ Well, I would say when I was a kid, I was less patient than I am now because of my behavior, and as I grew up I became a calmer person, which improved my social relationships.

Errors: 'last patient' should be 'less patient' (comparison error, type 25). 'That I, uh, that I am now' is redundant and ungrammatical (type 26). 'As I grow up, I was becoming' has tense mismatch; use 'as I grew up I became' (past tense consistency, type 5/6). 'More calm person' should be 'a calmer person' (adjective comparison and article, types 25 and 22). Suggestion: use 'less ... than', keep past tense consistent, and use comparative adjective 'calmer' with 'a'.