唱歌— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Your answer is a bit long and somewhat repetitive. Try to make your response more natural and concise by avoiding redundancy and organizing your ideas clearly. Use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly.

示例: Yes, I like singing because it helps me relax and escape from daily stress. I especially enjoy classical and instrumental songs. Also, singing with my friends during trips creates enjoyable moments and strengthens our bond.

建议: Your answer is understandable but some sentences are unclear and grammar needs improvement. Try to use clearer expressions and correct grammar. Also, use linking words to make your answer coherent.

示例: I haven't learned singing professionally or taken any classes. However, I use online tutorials and expert videos to improve my vocal skills. Additionally, a friend who is a professional singer has taught me some techniques.

建议: Your answer is unclear and contains grammatical errors. Avoid filler words like 'uh' and 'umm'. Try to express your ideas clearly and directly with correct grammar and use linking words to connect your points.

示例: I would like to sing a beautiful song for my parents because they have always encouraged me to become a professional singer. Although I was not very motivated before, if I become a professional singer someday, I would love to dedicate a song to them.

建议: Your answer has good ideas but some sentences are repetitive and grammar needs improvement. Try to use varied vocabulary and linking words to make your answer more coherent and natural.

示例: Yes, definitely. Singing helps people relax and express their creativity and emotions. These emotions can spread to others, creating happiness. Moreover, singing allows people to unwind and escape from reality, which often brings smiles to their faces.

× I often enjoy singing because it helps me unwind and relax as well as get into different realities.

✓ I often enjoy singing because it helps me unwind, relax, and get into different realities.

The original sentence lacks parallel structure in the list of verbs after 'helps me'. To maintain grammatical correctness and clarity, all verbs should be in the same form and connected properly with commas and conjunctions.

× Classical as well as instrumental songs are my favorite.

✓ Classical as well as instrumental songs are my favorites.

The word 'favorite' should be plural 'favorites' because it refers to multiple types of songs, indicating more than one favorite.

× It helps me bond with my friends during the trip while I will be singing and similarly it is very enjoyable moment so I love singing.

✓ It helps me bond with my friends during the trip while I am singing, and similarly, it is a very enjoyable moment, so I love singing.

The phrase 'while I will be singing' is incorrect because 'while' requires present continuous tense, not future. Also, 'very enjoyable moment' needs an article 'a' before 'very enjoyable moment'. Commas are added for clarity.

× Not professionally, I haven't taken any classes.

✓ Not professionally, I haven't taken any classes.

No correction needed here as the sentence correctly uses present perfect tense to indicate an action not done up to now.

× I want to learn to sing but I use the online tutorial as well as some videos from the experts to learn how to grab the vocal chords.

✓ I want to learn to sing, so I use online tutorials as well as some videos from experts to learn how to control the vocal cords.

The phrase 'grab the vocal chords' is incorrect; the correct expression is 'control the vocal cords'. Also, 'the online tutorial' should be plural 'online tutorials' for general reference. Added comma and conjunction for sentence clarity.

× But my friend was a professional singer, he taught me some aspect of it but I haven't taken professional at the moment.

✓ But my friend was a professional singer; he taught me some aspects of it, but I haven't taken professional lessons at the moment.

'Some aspect' should be plural 'some aspects' because it refers to multiple parts. Also, 'taken professional' is incomplete; it should be 'taken professional lessons'. Punctuation is corrected for sentence separation.

× I think I'll sing a lovely song from my parents because, uh, they always saw me as a professional singer.

✓ I think I'll sing a lovely song for my parents because, uh, they have always seen me as a professional singer.

The phrase 'sing a lovely song from my parents' is incorrect; it should be 'sing a lovely song for my parents'. Also, 'they always saw me' should be present perfect 'they have always seen me' to indicate ongoing perception.

× They always had this, umm, desire to make me as a singer because my family are have a background of singing.

✓ They have always had this, umm, desire to make me a singer because my family has a background in singing.

'Make me as a singer' is incorrect; it should be 'make me a singer'. 'My family are have' is incorrect; it should be 'my family has' because 'family' is singular. Also, 'background of singing' should be 'background in singing'.

× But I couldn't do it and I was not too motivated to be a singer.

✓ But I couldn't do it, and I was not very motivated to be a singer.

The sentence is mostly correct; 'not too motivated' is acceptable but 'not very motivated' is more natural. Added comma for clarity.

× So if I ever made a professional singer, I would love.

✓ So if I ever become a professional singer, I would love it.

The original sentence is incomplete and ungrammatical. 'Made a professional singer' is incorrect; it should be 'become a professional singer'. Also, 'I would love' needs an object, so 'it' is added.

× Singing can be a source to relax and communicate with other and express creativity and emotions.

✓ Singing can be a source to relax, communicate with others, and express creativity and emotions.

'Communicate with other' is incorrect; it should be 'communicate with others' to refer to people in general. Added commas for clarity.

× Such kind of emotions can be propagated and as well as create the happiness to the people.

✓ Such kinds of emotions can be propagated and can also create happiness for people.

The phrase 'and as well as' is redundant; use either 'and' or 'as well as'. 'Create the happiness to the people' is incorrect; it should be 'create happiness for people'. Also, 'Such kind' should be plural 'Such kinds'.

× Singing is not only the source to generate the happiness but it's to relax and unwind and get into different realities.

✓ Singing is not only a source of generating happiness but also a way to relax, unwind, and get into different realities.

The phrase 'the source to generate the happiness' is awkward; 'a source of generating happiness' is better. Also, parallel structure is improved by adding 'a way to' before 'relax, unwind, and get'.

× Singing can help people to smile.

✓ Singing can help people smile.

The phrase 'help people to smile' is grammatically correct but more natural without 'to'.