聊天— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 문법과 문장구조를 교정하고 더 자연스러운 표현으로 바꾸세요. 현재 문장에는 동사 원형 오류(‘to chatting’ → ‘to chat’), 연결 표현의 반복, 그리고 길게 늘어지는 구조가 있습니다. 간결한 주제문(예: I enjoy chatting with my friends)이 필요하고 이유를 1~2개의 구체적 세부사항으로 뒷받침하세요. 또한 ‘instead of meet them in real life’는 자연스럽지 않으므로 ‘instead of meeting them in person’으로 바꾸세요.

示例: I enjoy chatting with my friends because I can easily express my feelings and share daily moments. For example, we often send emojis and photos to show how we feel, which helps us stay close even when we can’t meet in person.

建议: 주어와 동사의 일치와 시제, 문장 연결을 고치세요. ‘me and my friends’는 비격식이나 문법적으로는 ‘my friends and I’가 더 좋습니다. 문장을 더 간결하게 하고 예시를 구체적으로 제시하세요. 연결 표현(For example, Because)은 문장 흐름상 적절히 사용하세요.

示例: My friends and I usually talk about things that happen in our daily lives, especially school-related matters. For example, we discuss homework deadlines, class projects, and sometimes our relationships with classmates and teachers.

建议: 표현을 더 자연스럽고 간결하게 다듬으세요. ‘as long as’는 조건 의미로 자주 오해되므로 ‘because’ 혹은 ‘since’로 바꾸고, 복수 표현과 관사 사용을 정리하세요(‘a variety of points of view’). 또한 supporting detail을 하나로 명확히 정리하세요.

示例: I prefer chatting in a group because we can hear different opinions. If I have a problem, my friends offer a variety of points of view, which helps me consider the situation from different angles.

建议: ‘as long as’ 대신 이유를 직접 연결하는 표현을 쓰고, 목록을 나열할 때 쉼표를 정확히 사용하세요. ‘there are only three ways’는 과장될 수 있으니 ‘mainly’ 같은 완화 표현을 쓰세요. 마지막 문장은 더 자연스럽게 연결어로 정리하세요.

示例: I prefer face-to-face communication because social media is limited in how we express emotions. On social media we mainly use words, emojis, and photos, but in person we can read facial expressions and body language, which makes communication clearer.

建议: 문장 흐름과 문법을 다듬고 ‘never argue with anyone in online’ 같은 표현을 ‘never argue online’으로 고치세요. 이유 제시는 좋으므로 이를 더 간결하고 정확한 어휘로 표현하세요(‘convey’는 좋음). 또한 첫 문장에서 ‘Of course’는 필요 없을 수 있어 생략해도 됩니다.

示例: I sometimes argue with my friends, but I avoid arguing online because written messages and emojis often fail to convey tone and subtle emotions, which can lead to misunderstandings.

× I really like to chatting with my friends as long as I can express my feelings and also can share my own daily lives using chatting emojis and pictures instead of meet them in real life.

✓ I really like chatting with my friends as long as I can express my feelings and also share my daily life using emojis and pictures instead of meeting them in real life.

'Like' followed by a verb should use the -ing form (gerund), so 'to chatting' is incorrect; use 'liking chatting' or 'like chatting'. 'Can' should be followed by the base form 'share', not 'can share' after 'and' where parallel structure is needed; simplify to 'and share'. 'Daily lives' is awkward for a single speaker; use 'daily life'. 'Using chatting emojis and pictures' is redundant: 'emojis and pictures' is sufficient. Finally, 'instead of meet them' requires the -ing form after 'instead of', so use 'meeting them'.

× Actually me and my friends chats everything happened to our daily lives, but I think the most we talk is related to our schools.

✓ Actually my friends and I chat about everything that happens in our daily lives, but I think most of what we talk about is related to school.

Use subject pronoun order 'my friends and I' not 'me and my friends'. 'Chats' should be 'chat' to match plural subject. 'Everything happened to our daily lives' needs relative clause and present tense: 'everything that happens in our daily lives'. 'The most we talk' is unnatural; use 'most of what we talk about'. 'Our schools' can be simplified to 'school' when referring to the general topic.

× Because we're high school students, many issues happens every day.

✓ Because we're high school students, many issues happen every day.

'Issues' is plural so the verb should be the plural form 'happen', not 'happens'. Ensure subject-verb agreement in present simple.

× For example we chat about the homework or the relationships and the teachers.

✓ For example, we chat about homework, relationships, and teachers.

'The homework' is unnecessary; 'homework' is uncountable in general topics. Use commas to list items and remove 'the' before 'relationships' and 'teachers' for natural general statements.

× I prefer to chat with a group of people as long as we can share divergent opinions and thoughts.

✓ I prefer to chat with a group of people because we can share different opinions and thoughts.

'As long as' implies a condition or time, but the intended meaning is reason, so use 'because'. 'Divergent' is formal and unusual here; 'different' is more natural.

× If I have a problem or issue, they can give a variety of point of view that I can consider in all sides of it.

✓ If I have a problem or an issue, they can give a variety of points of view that I can consider from all sides.

Use 'a problem or an issue' with article before 'issue'. 'A variety of point of view' should be 'a variety of points of view'. 'Consider in all sides of it' is ungrammatical; use 'consider from all sides'.

× I prefer to communicate face to face as long as there are many limitations when chatting in social media.

✓ I prefer to communicate face to face because there are many limitations when chatting on social media.

'As long as' suggests conditional/time; the intended meaning is reason so use 'because'. Use the preposition 'on' with 'social media' not 'in'.

× When chatting in social media, there are only three ways to express our own feelings, words, emojis and pictures.

✓ When chatting on social media, there are only three ways to express feelings: words, emojis, and pictures.

Use 'on social media'. 'Our own feelings' can be shortened to 'feelings'. Use a colon or commas and include 'and' before the final item in a list.

× But when we talk some face to face, we can check the people's reactions and their expressions.

✓ But when we talk face to face, we can observe people's reactions and expressions.

Remove 'some' (unnecessary). 'Talk face to face' is correct phrase; 'check' is awkward for observing reactions—use 'observe'. Drop 'their' before 'expressions' for conciseness.

× Of course I argue with my friends, but I never argue with anyone in online because online communication usually relies on words, emojis and pictures that it is hard to convey tone and subtle emotions.

✓ Of course I argue with my friends, but I never argue with anyone online because online communication relies on words, emojis, and pictures, so it is hard to convey tone and subtle emotions.

Use 'online' without 'in'. The sentence had a run-on structure; use 'so' to connect cause and result. 'Usually' is optional; keeping 'relies' is sufficient. Punctuation and conjunction choice improve clarity.