爱好— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be concise and direct: start with a clear topic sentence naming your main hobbies, then give one or two specific supporting details using correct grammar and linking words. Avoid repetition and filler words. Also correct vocabulary and plural forms (e.g., badminton, variety/various hobbies).

示例: I have several hobbies, but I mainly enjoy badminton and swimming. For example, I play badminton twice a week with friends to improve my fitness, and I swim on weekends because it helps me relax and build endurance.

建议: Begin with a clear past-tense topic sentence and give a specific reason or short example. Use past tense consistently and correct nouns (a few hobbies) and avoid trailing off. Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' to connect ideas clearly.

示例: Yes, I had a few hobbies as a child. I loved painting because it helped me be creative, and I often cycled in the park in front of my house, so I could ride every afternoon after school.

建议: Answer directly and clearly: state which hobbies you've continued since childhood, then give one or two specific supporting details using correct grammar and linking words. Avoid unclear phrases (e.g., 'happy cinema') and repetitions. Use consistent verb forms and plural agreement.

示例: Yes, I have continued painting and cycling since childhood. For instance, I used to paint stories from my imagination, and today I still enjoy sketching landscapes; similarly, I cycle regularly with friends to stay fit and social.

建议: Start with a clear statement whether you share hobbies, then give a specific example and use correct possessive and noun forms (e.g., my older brother, he loves playing video games). Keep it concise and avoid filler sounds. Name the game briefly if relevant and explain how you participate together.

示例: Yes, I share a hobby with my older brother: we both enjoy mobile games. For example, we often play Mobile Legends together online in the evenings, which helps us bond and relax after work or study.

× Yes, I have varieties of my hobby, so I love playing sport as well.

✓ Yes, I have a variety of hobbies, so I love playing sports as well.

The noun 'varieties' is incorrect here; use 'a variety of' + plural noun to mean several kinds. 'Hobby' should be plural 'hobbies'. 'Sport' in general contexts is usually 'sports' when referring to different kinds or the activity in general. Suggestion: use 'a variety of hobbies' and 'sports'.

× I'm trying to play a a badmintons and also swimming because I can see they're beneficial of playing this sport and in the past I would say that I I.

✓ I'm trying to play badminton and also go swimming because I can see they're beneficial, and in the past I would say that I did.

Use the uncountable noun 'badminton' not 'badmintons'. Parallel structure requires 'play badminton and go swimming'. 'Beneficial of' is incorrect; use 'beneficial' or 'beneficial for' without 'of'. Sentence ended incomplete; 'in the past I would say that I did' completes the thought. Suggestion: use correct verb+ing forms and parallel verbs (play/go) and correct preposition or omit it.

× Yes, I can say that I have a few hobby when I was a child, uh, I love doing a, uh, painting and also cycling in the park because my home in my hometown, we have a park in front of our house, so it's easy for me to.

✓ Yes, I can say that I had a few hobbies when I was a child. I loved painting and also cycling in the park because at home in my hometown we had a park in front of our house, so it was easy for me to go there.

Use past tense 'had' to match 'when I was a child'. 'A few hobby' should be 'a few hobbies' (plural). 'I love doing a painting' should be 'I loved painting' (no article). 'My home in my hometown, we have' is ungrammatical and inconsistent tense; change to 'at home in my hometown we had'. The sentence ended incomplete; finish with 'go there'. Suggestion: match tense and use plural forms.

× Yeah, I definitely have a a happy cinema as a childhood. Uh, paintings and cycling is my are my most favorite, are the most favorite of my, umm, hobby.

✓ Yeah, I definitely had a happy childhood. Painting and cycling are my favorite hobbies.

'A happy cinema as a childhood' is incorrect; use 'a happy childhood'. 'Paintings and cycling is my are my most favorite' has pronoun and verb agreement errors; use singular 'painting' as an activity or 'paintings' as works, but better 'painting and cycling are my favorite hobbies'. Also 'most favorite' is redundant; use 'favorite'. Suggestion: simplify phrases and ensure subject-verb agreement.

× So I play it more often with my friends And painting has helped me to imagine a lot when I was a child.

✓ So I played them more often with my friends, and painting helped me imagine a lot when I was a child.

Since referring to childhood, use past tense 'played' not 'play'. 'Painting has helped me to imagine a lot when I was a child' mixes present perfect with a past time expression; use simple past 'helped me imagine' for clarity. Also 'play it' is vague; 'them' (activities) is clearer. Suggestion: keep past tense consistent for past time frames.

× Yes I do uh one of my brother, my biggest brother he love playing umm the video games and I also like he, he love playing the mobile game.

✓ Yes, I do. One of my brothers, my eldest brother, loves playing video games, and I also like that he loves playing mobile games.

'One of my brother' should be 'one of my brothers' (plural). 'My biggest brother' is better as 'my eldest brother'. Subject-verb agreement: 'he love' should be 'he loves'. 'The video games' is unnecessary article; use 'video games'. Clarify sentence with punctuation. Suggestion: use correct plural for 'one of my brothers' and ensure third person singular verbs take -s.

× So I also keen on the mobile gamma sword. So we basically like plays together.

✓ So I am also keen on the mobile game 'Gamma Sword'. We basically like to play together.

'I also keen' is missing the verb 'am' (be verb). 'Gamma sword' seemed to be a game title; corrected to 'Gamma Sword' and 'mobile game'. 'We basically like plays together' has wrong verb form; use 'like to play together' or 'enjoy playing together'. Suggestion: include correct auxiliary verbs and use infinitive after 'like'.

× And also like cycling is good.

✓ Also, cycling is good for me.

The phrase 'like cycling is good' is awkward; better to say 'cycling is good for me' or 'I also like cycling'. Make adjective/adverb usage clearer. Suggestion: choose clear structure: 'I also like cycling' or 'Cycling is good for my health'.