爱好— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Make the answer more concise and grammatical: start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition (e.g. “used to” several times) and finish the sentence. Improve verb forms and pronouns (I practice on my own).

示例: Yes, I enjoy singing. I took formal singing lessons for several years as a child, and although I stopped because of my studies, I still practise on my own whenever I have free time and often listen to music to improve my technique.

建议: Use correct tense and grammar (I was a child; I had a passion for singing). Give a clear topic sentence then one specific detail. Remove repeated fragments and use linking words to show time or reason.

示例: Yes, I was passionate about singing as a child. My parents enrolled me in singing lessons, which I attended for about five years, but I eventually had to stop because of my schoolwork.

建议: Provide a concise, well-structured response: one clear topic sentence followed by a supporting detail with a linking word (e.g. ‘however’ or ‘but’) explaining the change. Correct grammar: I was, enrolled in, I learned for five years.

示例: Yes, singing has been a hobby since childhood. My parents enrolled me in singing classes and I trained for about five years; however, I had to pause my lessons later because of my studies.

建议: Answer directly and clearly, using correct possessive forms and avoiding filler words. Use linking words to compare (e.g. ‘like’ or ‘similarly’) and provide one specific detail about your mother to support the answer.

示例: Yes, my mother also loves singing, so we share that hobby. She never took formal lessons herself, so she was very proud and supportive when I joined singing classes as a child.

× Yes I used to learn singing, I used to take singing lessons when I was a child but after that I had to stop singing because of my studies.

✓ Yes, I used to take singing lessons when I was a child, but later I had to stop because of my studies.

The phrase 'used to learn singing' is awkward; 'used to' with a verb means a past habit so 'used to take singing lessons' is correct. Also simplify 'after that I had to stop singing because of my studies' to 'later I had to stop because of my studies' for clarity and naturalness. Ensure commas separate clauses and include 'take' with 'singing lessons' rather than 'learn singing'.

× But still I keep practicing by my own now and whenever I get time I listen to music and.

✓ But I still practice on my own now, and whenever I have time I listen to music.

'I keep practicing by my own' is unidiomatic; use 'I still practice on my own'. 'Whenever I get time' is colloquial; 'whenever I have time' is more natural. The original sentence ended with 'and.' which is incomplete; finish the thought or remove 'and.'.

× When I were a child I had to I had to passions on singing, so my parents took me to the singing lesson classes and joined me there.

✓ When I was a child, I had a passion for singing, so my parents took me to singing lessons and enrolled me there.

Use 'was' not 'were' for first singular 'I'. 'I had to I had to passions on singing' is incorrect and redundant; correct to 'I had a passion for singing'. 'Singing lesson classes' is redundant; use 'singing lessons'. 'Joined me there' is wrong because parents enrolled the student; 'enrolled me there' is correct.

× After that I took a singing lesson for about 5 years but then I had to stop it for studies.

✓ After that I took singing lessons for about five years, but then I had to stop because of my studies.

Use plural 'singing lessons' for a period of study. 'Stop it for studies' is unnatural; say 'stop because of my studies'. Use consistent past tense and write out numbers under ten as words in formal responses.

× When I were a child, I was passionate about singing, so my parents enrolled me into singing classes and I joined the classes and I was learning there for five years.

✓ When I was a child, I was passionate about singing, so my parents enrolled me in singing classes and I attended them for five years.

Use 'was' not 'were'. 'Enrolled me into' is less natural than 'enrolled me in'. 'Joined the classes and I was learning there for five years' is wordy; 'attended them for five years' is clearer and concise.

× But after that I had to stop it because of my studies.

✓ But after that I had to stop because of my studies.

Remove the pronoun 'it' as it is unnecessary and unnatural here. The tense 'had to stop' is correct; simplify the sentence for clarity.

× Yes, my mother's hobby was singing too, so in that case, my my hobby, my MO mother's hobby match each other.

✓ Yes, my mother's hobby was singing too, so in that sense my hobby and my mother's hobby matched each other.

The original has repetition ('my my', 'MO') and wrong tense agreement 'match' should be past 'matched' to match 'was'. Use 'in that sense' rather than 'in that case' for this meaning. Fix possessive spacing and remove typographical errors.

× But my mom couldn't take any classes, so she was very excited umm for me when I joined the singing lesson classes.

✓ But my mom couldn't take any classes, so she was very excited for me when I joined the singing lessons.

Remove filler 'umm'. 'Singing lesson classes' is redundant; use 'singing lessons'. The structure is fine otherwise; keep past tense 'couldn't' and 'joined' consistent.