爱好— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be concise and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence (e.g., “Yes, my favourite hobby is yoga.”), then add one or two specific reasons using linking words. Correct verb forms, articles and word choice (e.g., “makes me feel relaxed, more energetic, and less stressed”). Keep it to 2–4 sentences.

示例: Yes, my favourite hobby is yoga. It makes me feel relaxed and more energetic throughout the day, so I try to practice every morning. For example, a short 20-minute routine helps me focus and reduces my stress before work.

建议: Answer directly and use past tense correctly. Begin with a topic sentence (e.g., “Yes, I did.”), then explain what you did and why, using clear linking words (because, so, for example). Be specific about the activities and keep sentences simple and accurate.

示例: Yes, I did. As a child I often did high-intensity workouts because I wanted to become a model and stay slim. For example, I joined a kids’ fitness class twice a week to build strength and stamina.

建议: Use clear tense and structure to state continuity (have had since childhood). Start with a topic sentence (e.g., “Yes, I have practised yoga since childhood.”), then give specific benefits and use linking words (so, therefore, because). Avoid vague or incorrect words and keep within 2–4 sentences.

示例: Yes, I have practised yoga since I was a child. Because it improves my mood and concentration, I still do it daily; for instance, a morning session helps me feel calm and focused before studying.

建议: Be polite and use correct vocabulary. Start directly (e.g., “No, we don’t share the same hobbies.”), explain briefly why, and avoid negative or offensive wording. Provide one specific contrast and a linking word (for example, “whereas”). Keep it concise and grammatically correct.

示例: No, we don’t share the same hobbies. I enjoy physical activities like yoga and workouts, whereas my parents prefer quieter pastimes such as watching TV or cooking, so we spend free time differently.

× Is I have many hobbies but my favorite hobby is yoga which make me feel free, older and active all day.

✓ I have many hobbies, but my favorite hobby is yoga, which makes me feel free, younger and active all day.

Original uses 'Is I' incorrectly (unnecessary 'Is') and wrong verb form 'make' instead of 'makes' for singular subject 'yoga' (subject-verb agreement). 'Older' contradicted intended meaning; 'younger' or 'refreshed' fits better. Remove extra word and add commas for clarity. Suggestion: begin sentences with subject 'I' and ensure verb agrees with subject.

× So I like to do yoga everyday and it's feels so good.

✓ So I like to do yoga every day and it feels so good.

Original has 'everyday' used as an adjective; use 'every day' for frequency. Also contains 'it's feels' (redundant contraction plus verb) — correct is 'it feels'. Place adverbs properly and avoid redundant auxiliary verbs.

× Is I did when I were a child that I might do some workout, high intensity workout to maintain myself because I'm so crazy about the modeling.

✓ I did when I was a child: I used to do some workouts, high-intensity workouts, to maintain myself because I was very interested in modeling.

Remove erroneous 'Is' and use correct past tense 'was' (not 'were') with singular subject. 'Used to' expresses habitual past actions. 'Might do' is incorrect here; use 'used to do'. 'So crazy about the modeling' is informal and ungrammatical; use 'very interested in modeling'. Hyphenate 'high-intensity' and pluralize 'workouts'.

× That's why I like, I wanted to be, uh, fit and slim that time.

✓ That's why I wanted to be fit and slim at that time.

Mixes present 'like' with past 'wanted'; keep past tense for childhood ('wanted'). Remove filler and commas; use 'at that time' for clarity. Ensure pronoun and tense consistency.

× So it's so exciting to do.

✓ So it was very exciting to do.

Context refers to past experience, so use past tense 'was' rather than present 'is'. Also 'very' is more natural than repeated 'so'.

× Is I still have that hobbies is yoga exercise that is really good thing because when a roadway physical workout that day we feel so phrase active and also free from stress make focusing on one thing so.

✓ I still have that hobby: yoga exercises. They are really good because after a physical workout we feel very active and free from stress, which helps us focus on one thing.

Remove initial 'Is'. Use singular 'hobby' or say 'those hobbies' if plural; here 'yoga exercises' fits. Replace 'that is really good thing' with 'They are really good'. 'Roadway' and 'phrase' are incorrect — likely meant 'after' and 'very'. Use 'after a physical workout' and 'feel very active'. Use a relative clause 'which helps us focus' for the final idea. Ensure subject-verb agreement and clear word choice.

× No, we all have different kind of service.

✓ No, we all have different kinds of interests.

'Different kind' should be pluralized to 'different kinds' and 'service' is incorrect word; 'interests' fits the context about hobbies. Maintain plural agreement between 'different kinds' and the noun.

× So it's a totally different from my parents, my families, because I like to do some work.

✓ So it's totally different from my parents' hobbies and my family's hobbies, because I like to do physical exercise.

Original mixes subjects and uses awkward phrasing. Use possessive 'parents'' and 'family's hobbies' or combine into 'my parents' hobbies'. Clarify 'do some work' to 'do physical exercise' to match context. Remove unnecessary article 'a' before 'totally different'.

× They don't like to do workout, they just wanted to eat and slave.

✓ They don't like to work out; they just want to eat and relax.

Use 'work out' (phrasal verb) and present tense 'don't like' paired with present 'want' (consistency). 'Wanted' implies past. 'Slave' is incorrect and possibly offensive; likely intended 'relax' or 'be lazy'. Choose 'relax' or 'prefer to be inactive'.

× They don't want to do physical work.

✓ They don't want to do physical exercise.

'Physical work' usually means labor; in context of hobbies, 'physical exercise' is the appropriate term. Keep present tense to match previous sentence.