爱好— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Cần cải thiện ngữ pháp cơ bản, chia động từ và cách dùng đại từ; sắp xếp câu ngắn gọn hơn để tự nhiên và hiệu quả. Hãy tránh câu quá dài, sửa lỗi như “the one who always enjoy my cook” → “the people who always enjoy my cooking”, “how do I cook” → “how I cook”, “sometime is some suggestion” → “sometimes give me suggestions”. Ngoài ra dùng từ vựng chính xác như “compliments” và “suggestions”, và thêm liên từ đơn giản để mạch lạc.

示例: Yes, my favorite hobby is cooking. I enjoy it because my family always appreciates my food and their smiles motivate me. They often compliment how I cook and sometimes give helpful suggestions to improve my dishes.

建议: Cần dùng thì phù hợp (quá khứ) và cấu trúc tự nhiên hơn. Thay “My previous hobby is” bằng “My hobby was drawing” và “I want to be an artist” nên chuyển thành quá khứ “I wanted to be an artist”. Tránh từ vựng lạ như “various spectrum of colors” — dùng “a wide range of colors”. Giữ câu ngắn, rõ ràng và có liên từ để liên kết cảm xúc và lý do.

示例: My hobby when I was a child was drawing, and I wanted to be an artist. I enjoyed using a wide range of colors in my artwork. Whenever I look back at my drawings, I feel proud because they cheer me up.

建议: Cần dùng thì và cấu trúc đối chiếu rõ ràng: “I used to enjoy drawing, but now I prefer cooking.” Sửa cụm từ không chính xác như “modern technique” và “put in to the one you cook for” → “the love you put into the food for someone”. Giảm độ dài câu, dùng liên từ như “but” và “because” để làm rõ lý do.

示例: I used to enjoy drawing, but now I prefer cooking. I chose cooking because it is more than technique or presentation; it shows the love you put into the food for someone.

建议: Cần chỉnh ngữ pháp (số ít/ nhiều và chia động từ) và dùng từ phù hợp. Sửa các lỗi: “Definitely no” → “Definitely not”, “my mother fancy shopping” → “my mother fancies shopping” hoặc “likes shopping”, “my brother is a big fan of playing games” → “my brother is a big gamer” hoặc “loves playing video games”. Dùng “each member in my family has different hobbies” thay vì “have”. Loại bỏ lỗi đánh máy “VI” và câu cuối nên rõ ràng: “It’s not strange; it shows our different personalities.” Dùng liên từ để làm mạch lạc.

示例: Not really. My father loves traveling, my mother enjoys shopping, and my brother loves playing video games. I prefer drawing, so each family member has different hobbies, which I think reflects our varied personalities.

× I love cooking because the one who always enjoy my cook is my family.

✓ I love cooking because the ones who always enjoy my cooking are my family.

'Enjoy' must agree with plural subject 'the ones' so use 'enjoy'. 'Cook' as a noun meaning 'the food I cook' should be 'cooking'. Also subject-verb agreement: 'the ones... are my family'.

× I love the way they smile and give me compliments about how do I cook and sometime is some suggestion to improve my cooking skills.

✓ I love the way they smile and give me compliments about how I cook, and sometimes they give suggestions to improve my cooking skills.

Do not use 'do' in indirect question 'how I cook'. 'Sometime' should be 'sometimes' (adverb). 'Is some suggestion' is incorrect; use 'they give suggestions'. Ensure parallel structure and correct word order.

× My previous hobby is drawing when I was a child.

✓ My previous hobby was drawing when I was a child.

The time phrase 'when I was a child' sets the clause in the past, so the verb should be past tense 'was' rather than 'is'.

× I want to be an artist.

✓ I wanted to be an artist.

The speaker is referring to a past aspiration ('when I was a child'), so the verb should be past tense 'wanted' to match the time frame.

× I love my art work with various spectrum of colors.

✓ I love my artwork with a wide spectrum of colors.

Use 'artwork' as one word. 'Various spectrum' is awkward; use 'a wide spectrum' or 'a variety of colors'. Add article 'a'.

× Every time I look back to my art work, I feel proud and delighted because they make my day.

✓ Every time I look back at my artwork, I feel proud and delighted because it makes my day.

Use 'look back at' not 'look back to'. 'Artwork' is singular, so use 'it makes my day' not 'they make'.

× My previous hobby is drawing, but now I prefer cooking over drawing because I found that cooking is not just modern technique, pressure to impress someone, or just simply tasting.

✓ My previous hobby was drawing, but now I prefer cooking to drawing because I found that cooking is not just about modern techniques, pressure to impress someone, or simply tasting.

Match past reference with 'was'. Use 'prefer X to Y' not 'prefer X over Y'. Add 'about' after 'not just'. Use plural 'techniques' and remove redundant 'just'.

× It's about the love you put in to the one you cook for.

✓ It's about the love you put into the person you cook for.

Use 'put into' as one word 'into'. 'The one you cook for' is informal; 'the person you cook for' is clearer.

× Definitely no.

✓ Definitely not.

'No' as a short answer is used alone with a question; 'definitely not' is the correct adverbial negative response here.

× my mother fancy shopping and my brother is a big fan of playing games.

✓ my mother fancies shopping and my brother is a big fan of playing games.

Subject-verb agreement: third person singular 'mother' requires 'fancies'.

× Furthermore, I love drawing.

✓ Furthermore, I love drawing.

No grammatical change needed; sentence is correct. Included for completeness.

× Each member in my family have a different kind of hobbies, but I love that difference.

✓ Each member of my family has a different kind of hobby, but I love that difference.

'Each member' is singular so use 'has'. 'Of my family' is the usual prepositional phrase. Use singular 'a different kind of hobby' or plural 'different kinds of hobbies' depending on meaning.

× It's not weird, it's about VI various characteristic.

✓ It's not weird; it's about various characteristics.

Remove 'VI' (appears to be a typo). Use plural 'characteristics' to match 'various'. Use punctuation to separate clauses.