走路— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be concise and coherent: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler words, correct grammar (use present perfect/simple correctly), and give one or two specific supporting details with linking words. Keep it under five sentences.

示例: Yes, I walk regularly these days because overtime work made me more conscious about my health. For example, I go for a 30-minute walk in the park with my husband every evening, which helps me manage my weight and relieve stress.

建议: Provide a clear topic sentence, reduce hesitation and repetition, and include one specific example or memory. Use linking words to connect ideas and correct tense usage.

示例: Yes, I often walked a lot as a child because I was very active. For instance, I would walk to the nearby park with friends to play games every afternoon, which kept me fit and happy.

建议: Answer directly, avoid unclear phrases (e.g., "inhaled fresh air", "parking spot"), and provide two clear reasons with a linking word. Use appropriate vocabulary for park features.

示例: People like walking in parks because they can breathe fresh air and enjoy a peaceful environment. Also, parks offer wide paths and seating areas, so friends can walk together and chat comfortably.

建议: Make a clear hypothetical statement using conditional structure, avoid contradictions (crowded city vs pleasant mountains), and give a specific, coherent location and reasons. Keep it concise and remove fillers.

示例: If I had the chance, I would take a long walk in the countryside near my city, where there are mountain views and quiet trails. I prefer this because the scenery is relaxing and there is plenty of space to walk without crowds.

建议: Use correct past tense, avoid redundancy, and structure answer with a clear topic sentence plus one or two specific details about the walk. Limit to five sentences and avoid extra fillers.

示例: Last weekend I went for a walk in a nearby park with my friends and family. We walked for about an hour, chatted a lot, and listened to music, which made the afternoon very relaxing.

× Lately, I have started doing a lot of work around my house or in parks because I have With overtime, I have become more, uh, conscious about my health and to maintain my weight, I usually walk and I also make sure that I walk with my husband and my family can also give.

✓ Lately, I have started doing a lot of work around my house and in parks because, with overtime, I have become more conscious about my health. To maintain my weight, I usually walk, and I also make sure that I walk with my husband; my family can join me.

This sentence contains mixed and incomplete tenses and awkward coordination. 'I have With overtime' is garbled; combine ideas and keep present perfect for recent changes ('I have started', 'I have become'). Use 'and' instead of 'or' for parallel activities. Use 'join me' instead of 'can also give' which is incorrect. Use commas and conjunctions to link clauses clearly. Grammar problem type ID:5

× Yes, during my childhood days, I was the most, uh, active and naughty kid and I used to do a lot of walking, like umm, and also playing around in my neighborhood and also in parks.

✓ Yes, during my childhood I was a very active and naughty child. I used to walk a lot and play around in my neighborhood and in parks.

Use 'child' instead of 'kid' for more formal speech; reduce filler words. Use 'used to' for past habitual actions and parallel verbs should be consistent: 'used to walk' and 'play' -> better to repeat 'used to' or change to simple past structure. Remove redundant 'also' and 'days'. Grammar problem type ID:6

× So I used to do a lot of activities during my childhood. It's a kind of walk and it always helped me to maintain my weight.

✓ So I used to do a lot of activities during my childhood. It was a form of exercise and it always helped me maintain my weight.

Tense consistency: describe past habits in past tense ('was'). 'It's a kind of walk' is awkward; use 'a form of exercise'. 'Helped me to maintain' -> 'helped me maintain' is more natural. Also avoid contraction 'It's' when referring to past. Grammar problem type ID:27

× Nowadays majority of the people prefer doing walk in park because it helps to get in a inhaled fresh air and also there is a parking spot where people can and do walk with their friends.

✓ Nowadays, the majority of people prefer walking in parks because it helps them get fresh air. Also, there are parking spots where people can meet and walk with their friends.

Add definite article 'the' before 'majority'. Use gerund 'walking' not 'doing walk'. 'In park' -> 'in parks'. 'Get in a inhaled fresh air' is incorrect; use 'get fresh air'. 'Parking spot' confused with 'parking'—clarify 'parking spots' as places to park cars and 'meet'. Ensure plural agreement 'are parking spots'. Grammar problem type ID:11

× If I had a chance, I will definitely do walk around my city area because nowadays it has become more crowded and people are not getting sufficient space to do walking.

✓ If I had the chance, I would definitely take a walk around my city because it has become more crowded and people do not have sufficient space to walk.

Mixed conditional: use 'If I had' (past subjunctive) with 'would' not 'will'. 'Do walk' is incorrect; use 'take a walk' or 'walk'. 'City area' -> 'city' is natural. 'Do walking' -> 'to walk' or 'space to walk'. Maintain tense consistency. Grammar problem type ID:7

× So if I get definitely I want to walk around the city by seeing the pleasant mountains and uh, scenery.

✓ So if I get the chance, I definitely want to walk around the city and see the pleasant mountains and scenery.

Missing object after 'get' — should be 'get the chance'. Word order: 'definitely I want' -> 'I definitely want'. Use parallel verbs 'walk around' and 'see'. Remove filler 'uh'. Grammar problem type ID:1

× Last weekend I have went for a walk in a park nearby with my friends and a family and during my walking was so enjoyable with them as we had lot of talks and discussions while walking and we also listened to musics which has made my day more relaxed.

✓ Last weekend I went for a walk in a nearby park with my friends and family. The walk was very enjoyable because we had many conversations while walking, and we also listened to music, which made my day more relaxing.

Use simple past 'went' for a finished time expression 'Last weekend' (not present perfect 'have went', which is ungrammatical; past participle is 'gone' but simple past is correct here). 'A family' -> 'family' or 'my family'. 'During my walking was so enjoyable' is ungrammatical; restructure: 'The walk was very enjoyable'. 'Had lot of talks' -> 'had many conversations'. 'Musics' -> 'music' (uncountable). 'Which has made' -> 'which made' to match past tense. Grammar problem type ID:5