旅行— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Improve grammar and clarity: use correct verb forms, articles, and prepositions; give a clear topic sentence and one or two concise supporting details. Link ideas with simple connectors like “so” or “because.” Keep responses within 3–4 sentences. For example, say when and why you look out, and give one specific memory.

示例: Yes, I usually look out the window when I travel by car or bus because I enjoy watching the landscape. For example, when I visited Finland this year, I had an eight‑hour car journey, so I spent most of the time looking at the scenery to pass the time. It helped me notice details like forests and lakes that I wouldn’t see from a plane.

建议: Make your reason clear and correct grammar: use plural nouns properly, correct word order, and connect clauses with because/so. Provide one concise reason and a brief example of what you capture. Avoid repetition and unclear words like “moment so it's so limited since.”

示例: Yes, I often take photos through the car window because the scenery changes quickly and I want to capture special moments. For instance, I photographed a sunset over the hills last summer because the colours were beautiful and I knew they would disappear quickly.

建议: Clarify preference and give specific reasons and an example. Use a clear topic sentence stating your choice (mountains or the sea). Use correct tense and sentence structure, and add one brief memory to support your preference. Keep to 2–3 sentences total.

示例: I prefer the sea because being near the ocean relaxes me and makes me feel refreshed. When I was a child, my parents took me to the coast every summer, and those memories of swimming and walking on the beach make the sea my favourite place.

× Yes, when I trouble I always watch the window from car or bus.

✓ Yes, when I am troubled I always watch out of the window from the car or bus.

Subject-verb agreement and verb form: 'I trouble' is incorrect; use passive/adjective 'I am troubled' or better 'when I'm troubled'. Also add prepositions/articles: 'watch out of the window' or 'look out of the window', and include 'the' before 'car or bus' to specify those vehicles. Improve sentence flow by using present continuous or simple present correctly.

× When I visit Finland in this year I had the I had eight hours travel by car and I didn't have anything to ring the trip, so I always watching the scene.

✓ When I visited Finland this year I had an eight-hour car trip and I didn't have anything to do on the trip, so I was always watching the scenery.

Tense and form errors: 'When I visit Finland in this year' should be past simple 'When I visited Finland this year' because the trip already happened. 'I had the I had eight hours travel' is redundant; use 'I had an eight-hour car trip.' 'Didn't have anything to ring the trip' is incorrect—presumably 'to do on the trip.' 'I always watching' should be past continuous 'I was always watching.' 'Scene' is better as 'scenery.'

× Yes, I take photo outside window because when I watch the scene from the car the scene is always moment so it's so limited since and I need to capture the moment I think.

✓ Yes, I take photos out of the window because the scenery from the car is always fleeting, so it's limited and I need to capture the moment.

Tense and count errors: 'I take photo' should be 'I take photos' (plural). 'Outside window' -> 'out of the window.' 'When I watch the scene' better 'the scenery from the car is always fleeting' to express brief moments. Remove extraneous words 'since' and 'I think.' Use present simple for habitual action.

× I prefer seas jam mountain because when I going when I go to see it's helps me feel relaxed and refreshed.

✓ I prefer the sea to the mountains because when I go to see the sea it helps me feel relaxed and refreshed.

Number and article errors: 'seas jam mountain' is unclear; likely 'the sea to the mountains.' Use comparative structure 'prefer A to B.' 'When I going when I go to see' has duplication and incorrect form; use 'when I go to see the sea.' 'It's helps' has subject-verb error; use 'it helps.'

× When I was a child I always got to see with my parents that's why I.

✓ When I was a child I always went to see it with my parents, which is why I do now.

Verb choice and sentence completion: 'I always got to see with my parents' is awkward; 'went to see it with my parents' is natural. Sentence ended incomplete 'that's why I.' Clarify the result clause: 'which is why I do now' or specify 'that's why I prefer it.' Use past simple 'went' for past habit.