旅行— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and correct word choice; use one clear topic sentence then 1–2 supporting details with linking words. Avoid hesitation words like “uh” and correct vocabulary errors (e.g. “nauseatic” → “nauseous” or “feel nauseous”). Keep within 3–4 sentences and vary vocabulary (e.g. “I usually avoid looking out because I get motion sickness, so I close my eyes or listen to music to cope”).

示例: I usually avoid looking out of the window because I get motion sickness, so I close my eyes or try to sleep. Alternatively, I sometimes listen to music to distract myself during the journey.

建议: Start with a clear direct response and then give one specific example plus a reason. Use correct adjective forms (e.g. “feel nauseous” not “nauseating”) and avoid repeating reasons already given. Use linking words like “however” to contrast. Keep sentences concise and natural.

示例: Sometimes I do, but only when we stop. For example, on a trip to Aching in China last year, we stopped to photograph the beautiful mountain ranges. However, I rarely take pictures from a moving car because I get motion sickness.

建议: Provide a clear topic sentence and then two concise reasons with correct grammar and vocabulary. Fix errors: use “because” correctly, say “I prefer the sea because I love the beach and the water,” and “I’m afraid of heights” instead of “height phobia.” Avoid sentence fragments and finish thoughts. Use linking words like “also” or “so” to connect ideas.

示例: I prefer the sea because I love the beach and being near water. I’m also afraid of heights, so mountains make me uncomfortable and trigger my anxiety.

× it makes me feel nauseatic when I look outside the moving vehicle.

✓ it makes me feel nauseous when I look outside the moving vehicle.

'Nauseatic' is not a standard English adjective. The correct adjective is 'nauseous' to describe feeling sick. Use 'nauseous' after a linking verb (makes me feel nauseous).

× So I tend to just close my eyes and try to fall asleep during my journey.

✓ So I tend to just close my eyes and try to fall asleep during my journey.

Sentence is grammatical; no change needed. Present participle forms are used correctly. (Included to show checked against list.)

× For example, last year I visited Aching in China and it has beautiful mountain ranges, so we stopped our car and took pictures of the view.

✓ For example, last year I visited Aching in China, and it has beautiful mountain ranges, so we stopped the car and took pictures of the view.

Use 'the car' rather than 'our car' for a more natural narrative reference when recounting a trip unless emphasis on possession is needed. Also add a comma before 'and' for clarity. This fixes prepositional/possessive nuance.

× But I usually do not take pictures in a moving vehicle because I have motion sickness and it makes me feel nauseating.

✓ But I usually do not take pictures in a moving vehicle because I have motion sickness and it makes me feel nauseous.

'Nauseating' means causing nausea (it is used to describe something that causes sickness). To describe the speaker's feeling, use the adjective 'nauseous'.

× I prefer the sea that is because I love the beach and the water.

✓ I prefer the sea because I love the beach and the water.

'That is' is an unnecessary and awkward conjunction here. Use 'because' directly to link preference and reason. Removing 'that is' produces a clear, natural sentence.

× I do not like mountains because I have height phobia and whenever I am looking at a mountain it just triggers my fear.

✓ I do not like mountains because I have a fear of heights and whenever I look at a mountain it triggers my fear.

'Height phobia' is nonstandard; the natural phrase is 'a fear of heights'. Also use simple present 'I look' rather than progressive 'I am looking' for habitual actions. This corrects adjective/noun usage and tense.

× So that is why I enjoying looking at the sea and it makes me feel.

✓ So that is why I enjoy looking at the sea; it makes me feel relaxed.

'I enjoying' is incorrect because the verb needs the base form after 'I' (subject) — 'I enjoy'. Also the original sentence ends abruptly with 'it makes me feel.' Provide a complete complement (for example, 'relaxed') to complete the thought. The semicolon separates related clauses.