自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Improve grammar (use past tense consistently), reduce hesitations and repetition, and give a clear concise structure: start with a direct topic sentence, then one or two supporting details. Use linking words like "but" or "however" to connect ideas. Be specific about experiences (e.g., how you used your brother's bike, frequency, feelings).

示例: No, I didn't have my own bike as a child, but my brother had one that I often borrowed. For example, I rode it to visit friends every weekend, and I remember practicing balancing in our park until I felt confident.

建议: Make the answer more coherent and accurate: use clear sentence structure, correct word choices (e.g., "afford" instead of "salary of cars"), and add a specific reason and an example. Use linking words such as "because", "for example", or "also" to connect ideas. Limit to 2–3 sentences.

示例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because they are affordable and convenient. For example, many children ride to school and adults use bicycles for short trips to the market, especially in cities where public transport is crowded.

× Actually, no, I don't have a bike when I was, when I, when I was a child, but uh, my brother uh, had the 1.

✓ Actually, no, I didn't have a bike when I was a child, but my brother did.

The sentence mixes present tense 'don't have' with past time reference 'when I was a child.' Use past simple 'didn't have' for past states. Also 'had the 1' is unclear; replace with 'my brother did' to indicate he had one. Suggestion: keep past tense consistently when talking about childhood (use 'did/didn't').

× So I am, I did do that for a long time, but it is not mine.

✓ So I did that for a long time, but it wasn't mine.

This sentence mixes present 'I am' and present 'is' with past activity. For an action in the past, use past simple 'did' and past 'wasn't' to describe ownership. Remove unnecessary filler 'I am' and keep past tense consistent.

× It is my brother uh, actually I read it and uh, it was.

✓ It belonged to my brother; actually, I remember it, and it was fun.

Original is fragmented and unclear: 'I read it' is likely wrong verb choice and 'it was' is incomplete. I clarified to 'belonged to my brother' for past possession and provided a complete clause. Suggest improving clarity by using complete verbs and full clauses.

× Yes, it's so popular in my country and there's a lot of there are a lot of children who ride a bike to go to the schools, to go to the supermarket and the right now because the salary of cars is so high, so they use bike a lot.

✓ Yes, bikes are very popular in my country, and there are a lot of children who ride bikes to school and to the supermarket. Right now, because the price of cars is so high, people use bikes a lot.

Multiple issues: use plural 'bikes are' for general statement (present simple), remove redundant phrases 'there's a lot of there are a lot'. Use 'ride bikes' (plural) and idiomatic 'to school' not 'to the schools.' 'Salary of cars' is incorrect collocation; use 'price of cars' or 'cost of cars.' Also clarify subject 'people' instead of ambiguous 'they.' Keep present simple for general truths and current situations.