分享— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 답변이 자연스럽고 내용도 좋지만, 'overtime'은 'over time'으로 띄어 써야 하며, 문장 연결을 더 명확하게 하기 위해 접속사를 활용하는 연습이 필요합니다.

示例: Yes, they did. I remember that my mother often encouraged me to share toys and snacks with my cousins. Although it was not easy at first, over time I understood that sharing makes relationships warmer and helps build trust.

建议: 마지막 문장에서 'have someone'은 의미가 불분명하므로 명확한 표현으로 수정해야 합니다. 또한, 문장 간 연결을 위해 'and' 같은 연결어를 추가하는 것이 좋습니다.

示例: I enjoy sharing food the most. For example, if I try a new dessert, I always want my friends to taste it too. I also like sharing ideas or experiences, especially if I think they could inspire someone or be helpful.

建议: 'shelled'는 오타이며 'shared'가 맞습니다. 또한 'on hygienic'은 'unhygienic'으로 수정해야 하며, 문장 구조를 더 명확하게 다듬는 연습이 필요합니다.

示例: Personal items like toothbrushes, makeup, or bank details definitely shouldn't be shared because they are either unhygienic or sensitive. I think setting boundaries is just as important as being generous.

建议: 마지막 문장에서 'from what I will read'는 시제와 의미가 어색하므로 'from what I have read'로 수정하는 것이 자연스럽습니다.

示例: Yes, actually I bought some books recently and I've been lending them to my friends. I find it satisfying when someone else can enjoy the same story or gain new insights from what I have read.

建议: 답변이 자연스럽지만, 두 문장을 연결할 때 쉼표 대신 세미콜론이나 접속사를 사용하는 것이 더 정확합니다.

示例: Usually my mother; she's always been supportive and I know she will genuinely celebrate my achievements. After that, I'd probably tell my closest friend.

建议: 'blunt'는 부적절한 단어 선택이며, 'close'나 'strong' 같은 단어로 바꾸어야 합니다. 또한 문장 연결을 위해 접속사를 추가하는 것이 좋습니다.

示例: Mostly personal updates like passing an exam, getting a new opportunity, or even small things like discovering a great restaurant. I think sharing positive news keeps our friendship close and connected.

× I also like sharing ideas or experiences, especially if I think they could inspire or have someone.

✓ I also like sharing ideas or experiences, especially if I think they could inspire someone or have an impact.

The phrase 'inspire or have someone' is incomplete and unclear. It seems the intended meaning is 'inspire someone or have an impact.' The preposition 'or have someone' is incorrect and needs clarification to convey the intended meaning clearly.

× Personal items like toothbrushes, makeup, or bank details definitely shouldn't be shelled because they are either on hygienic or sensitive.

✓ Personal items like toothbrushes, makeup, or bank details definitely shouldn't be shared because they are either unhygienic or sensitive.

The word 'shelled' is incorrect; the correct verb is 'shared.' Also, 'on hygienic' is incorrect; the correct adjective is 'unhygienic.' The preposition 'on' is misused here.

× I find it satisfying when someone else can enjoy the same story or gain new insights from what I will read.

✓ I find it satisfying when someone else can enjoy the same story or gain new insights from what I have read.

The phrase 'what I will read' incorrectly uses the future tense. Since the books have already been bought and lent, the present perfect 'have read' is appropriate to indicate completed action relevant to the present.

× I think sharing positive news keeps our friendship very blunt and connected.

✓ I think sharing positive news keeps our friendship very close and connected.

The adjective 'blunt' is incorrectly used to describe friendship. 'Blunt' means straightforward or abrupt, which is inappropriate here. The correct adjective is 'close,' meaning intimate or strong.