蛋糕— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 発音と文法の誤りを直し、応答を明確なトピック文と裏付けの詳細で構成してください。具体的には: 1) 不要な語（例: “I was worry”）を削除し正しい現在形を使う。2) 単語ミス（例: “agreed” → “candies”）を直す。3) 一文目で直接答え、その後で詳細（どのような甘い物が好きか、いつ作るか）を付ける。リンク語（例えば “also”, “for example”）を使って流れを良くする。

示例: Yes, I enjoy sweet foods, especially cakes and cookies. For example, I often buy chocolate chip cookies on weekends. Also, I plan to bake a Christmas cake tomorrow for the holiday, so I’m really looking forward to it.

建议: 不確かさを表す表現は良いですが、曖昧な語や不要な繰り返しを避け、具体例や理由を加えてください。1) “not sure about that deeply”は不自然なので “I’m not very familiar” に直す。2) 果物の例だけでなく伝統的な種類（例: 月餅）を挙げると説得力が増す。3) 接続詞（however, for example）を使って論理を整える。

示例: I’m not very familiar with traditional Chinese cakes, however I know one famous example is mooncakes, which are often eaten during the Mid-Autumn Festival. For example, mooncakes usually contain red bean paste or salted egg yolk.

建议: 短く直接的なトピック文を使い、文法と語彙を正すこと。1) “I rub cooking”は誤りなので “I enjoy cooking” に直す。2) 裏付けとしてどのようなケーキを作れるか、どの技術があるかを1–2文で具体的に述べる。3) 文を5文以内にまとめ、リンク語（for example, also）を使う。

示例: Yes, I can make cakes. For example, I can bake a simple sponge cake and decorate it with whipped cream and fruit. I enjoy baking desserts like puddings and cookies, so I often try new recipes on weekends.

建议: 時制と語の選択を正して、理由と具体例を明確に述べてください。1) 過去の習慣は過去形で統一（I didn’t like … when I was a child）。2) “Mont branch”は不明瞭なので正しい語（perhaps “Mont Blanc”）を確認する。3) 理由（スポンジが苦手）を述べ、代わりに好きだったものを具体的に挙げる。

示例: No, I didn’t like regular sponge cakes when I was a child because I found the texture too soft. Instead, I preferred cheesecakes and a dessert called Mont Blanc, which has chestnut cream.

建议: 良い応答ですが、より自然にするために語彙を改善し、理由と頻度を追加してください。1) “more refreshed”はやや不自然なので “refreshed” または “satisfied” にする。2) 頻度（often, sometimes）や別の具体例を加えると会話が豊かになる。3) 短い接続語（for example, usually）を使って流れを良くする。

示例: Yes, I usually have a small dessert after meals because it helps me feel satisfied. For example, I had a piece of chocolate after dinner with my dad yesterday, and sometimes I enjoy a fruit salad after lunch.

× I was worry I like to eat sweet foods such as agreed and cookies.

✓ I am worried. I like to eat sweet foods such as cakes and cookies.

The student used 'was worry' which is incorrect: 'worry' is a verb and the correct adjective is 'worried'; present tense fits the context. Also 'agreed' is likely a typo for 'cakes'. Use 'I am worried' for present state and separate sentences for clarity. Suggestion: Use 'I am worried' or 'I was worried' depending on time; use the adjective 'worried' not the verb form, and replace 'agreed' with the intended noun 'cakes'.

× In addition, I plan to make a Christmas cake tomorrow for the Christmas.

✓ In addition, I plan to make a Christmas cake tomorrow for Christmas.

Repeating 'the Christmas' is unnecessary and incorrect; when referring to the holiday generally use 'Christmas' without 'the'. 'Plan to make' correctly uses present tense to indicate a future plan. Suggestion: Omit the article 'the' before holiday names (Christmas, Easter).

× Actually I'm not Chinese so I'm not sure about that deeply, but I I think there are some Chinese cakes like using strawberry and grapes.

✓ Actually I'm not Chinese, so I'm not sure about that in detail, but I think there are some Chinese cakes that use strawberries and grapes.

The phrase 'about that deeply' is unnatural; 'in detail' or 'deeply' in different position is better. Duplicate 'I' is a typo. Use 'that use' to describe cakes and correct pluralization to 'strawberries' and 'grapes'. Suggestion: Use 'in detail' for saying lack of detailed knowledge, avoid duplicate words, and ensure verbs agree with noun phrases.

× Yes, as I mentioned I plan to make a Christmas cake tomorrow and I rub cooking sweet food like pudding or cookies, so I also like to bake.

✓ Yes, as I mentioned I plan to make a Christmas cake tomorrow, and I enjoy cooking sweet foods like pudding or cookies, so I also like to bake.

The phrase 'I rub cooking' is incorrect; likely intended 'I enjoy cooking'. Use 'enjoy' to express preference. 'Sweet food' should be plural 'sweet foods' or 'sweets'. Suggestion: Use 'enjoy' or 'like' for hobbies and ensure noun forms (plural) are correct.

× Not really, I do not like to eat cakes when I was a child because I don't like the sponges or cakes so I always chose cheesecakes or Mont branch.

✓ Not really. I did not like to eat cakes when I was a child because I didn't like sponge cakes, so I always chose cheesecakes or Mont Blanc.

Mixing present and past tenses: 'do not like' should be past 'did not like' to match 'when I was a child'. Use past tense 'didn't' and 'chose' is correct. 'Sponges or cakes' is incorrect phrase; 'sponge cakes' is natural. 'Mont branch' is likely 'Mont Blanc'. Suggestion: Keep tense consistent (past) for past habits and correct cake names.

× Definitely, I like to have some dessert after meals because it makes me more refreshed.

✓ Definitely, I like to have some dessert after meals because it makes me feel more refreshed.

The phrase 'more refreshed' is acceptable but 'feel more refreshed' is natural. No article error in first clause, but adding 'feel' clarifies the effect. Suggestion: Use 'feel' with states describing sensations.

× For example, I ate a piece of chocolate yesterday after eating dinner with my dad.

✓ For example, I ate a piece of chocolate yesterday after having dinner with my dad.

Use 'having dinner' or 'eating dinner' is acceptable; 'after having dinner' is slightly more natural. Tense 'ate' correctly indicates past. Suggestion: Use 'having dinner' to describe the completed action before another past action.