电子邮件— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Reduce hesitations and redundancy; start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific details using linking words. Aim for natural phrasing and varied vocabulary (e.g., use "often" once, and replace repeats with synonyms like "frequently").

示例: Yes, I often send emails, especially for work. For example, I frequently email my colleagues to coordinate project tasks, and I contact my manager when I need approval or feedback.

建议: Give a direct topic sentence then provide two specific situations linked clearly (use linking words like "for example" or "also"). Avoid tense mistakes and unclear phrases — be specific about who and why.

示例: I usually send emails when I need to share important information. For example, I email colleagues to announce that a project is finished, and I also write to clients to provide updates or ask for feedback.

建议: Avoid guessing and be honest if you lack information, then provide a reasonable opinion with reasons and clear linking words. Use correct collocations (e.g., "not very popular") and avoid vague references like "their population."

示例: I'm not sure because I don't live in China, but I suspect email is less popular for casual communication there. Many people may prefer instant messaging apps like WeChat for everyday chat, while email is still used for formal or work-related messages.

建议: Make a clear prediction with reasons and link them logically. Use precise vocabulary (e.g., "will become less popular") and provide an example or consequence. Keep answers concise and avoid filler words.

示例: I think email will become less popular for casual communication because people increasingly prefer instant messaging apps like WhatsApp or Telegram. However, email will likely remain important for formal communication and business purposes.

× I try to often send emails, uh, especially when I'm at work.

✓ I often try to send emails, especially when I'm at work.

The adverb 'often' is misplaced. In English, frequency adverbs typically go before the main verb ('try') or after the auxiliary. Moving 'often' before 'try' makes the sentence sound natural and clear. Suggestion: place frequency adverbs before the main verb: 'I often try to...'.

× I use emails very often and send emails to my colleagues, uh, to do my project, uh, for example, uh, when I want to connect with my manager.

✓ I use email very often and send emails to my colleagues to work on my project, for example when I want to connect with my manager.

'Emails' as a medium is usually referred to as 'email' (uncountable) here (article error/word choice), and 'to do my project' requires a different verb pattern. Use 'work on my project' (verb + preposition) to express collaboration. Also remove redundant words. Suggestion: use 'email' for the medium and 'work on' to describe collaborating on a project.

× Uh, actually depends, uh, when, uh, for example, when I was at work, uh, I sent e-mail to my colleagues, uh, to uh, announce them, umm, my project, uh, has been done.

✓ It actually depends. For example, when I was at work I sent emails to my colleagues to announce that my project had been completed.

The original is fragmented and missing a clear subject for 'depends' and misuses 'announce them'. 'Depends' needs a subject ('It depends'). Use 'announce that' to introduce a clause, and 'had been completed' (past perfect) is appropriate when referring to earlier completion relative to the past time of sending. Suggestion: add the subject 'It', use 'announce that', and use past perfect for clarity.

× Or, uh, when I want to communicate to uh, other, uh. OK.

✓ Or, when I want to communicate with others, OK.

The correct preposition with 'communicate' is 'with' when describing interaction between people. Also 'others' is the correct plural pronoun. Suggestion: use 'communicate with others'.

× Uh, actually, because I don't live in China, I don't, uh, understand what uh, they do and I don't know uh, what, but I think that in China they're sending emails very much unpopular because of the, uh, their population and the, the, so they do the.

✓ Actually, because I don't live in China I don't know what people there do, but I think emailing is not very popular in China because of their population and other factors.

The original misuses pronouns ('they' unclear) and has awkward phrasing ('they're sending emails very much unpopular'). Replace with 'people there' for clarity and use a natural adjective phrase 'is not very popular'. Remove filler and incomplete clause at the end. Suggestion: use clear subjects like 'people there' and the structure 'is not very popular'.

× Actually, I think that the sending emails, uh, will, uh, more or less in uh, future because I think the, uh, social media and uh, instant applications sending message such as, uh, WhatsApp or uh, Telegram, uh, can use instead of, uh, e-mail.

✓ Actually, I think that sending emails will be less popular in the future because social media and instant messaging apps such as WhatsApp or Telegram can be used instead of email.

Remove the unnecessary article 'the' before 'sending emails'. Use 'be less popular' for comparative future meaning. Use the correct noun 'instant messaging apps' and correct word order. Suggestion: omit unneeded articles, use 'messaging apps', and structure 'can be used instead of email'.