聚会— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more natural and grammatically accurate. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give two brief, specific supporting reasons using linking words. Avoid filler sounds and correct common errors (e.g., 'enjoy taking part in parties', 'parties usually have', 'make friends', avoid 'strange you are'). Keep answers to no more than 3–4 concise sentences.

示例: Yes, I enjoy going to parties because they usually have music and singing that create a lively atmosphere. In addition, parties are a good chance to show your personality and make new friends. For example, at a recent party I met several people who share my hobbies.

建议: Use past tense consistently and be specific about frequency. Begin with a direct topic sentence stating how often you attended parties as a child, then add one or two concrete examples or details using linking words (e.g., 'often', 'sometimes', 'because'). Reduce hesitations and correct phrases like 'participate the campus party' → 'attend school parties'.

示例: I often attended school parties when I was a child, especially during festivals and end-of-term celebrations. At those parties, we would sing and dance with classmates and sometimes teachers, and try different snacks and homemade treats.

建议: Answer directly with a clear past-tense statement and give specific details about what you organized and who attended. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid vague phrases like 'visit my friend, my family or my student.' Keep it concise (2–3 sentences) and remove fillers.

示例: Yes, I organized my own 18th birthday party for friends and family. I invited classmates and relatives, prepared snacks and music, and we spent the evening chatting and playing games.

× I enjoy to take a part of party because, uh, the party usually have music and uh, singing.

✓ I enjoy taking part in parties because the party usually has music and singing.

'Enjoy' is followed by a verb + -ing form, not 'to' + verb. Use 'taking part in' for the idiomatic expression. 'Party' should be plural if speaking generally, and subject-verb agreement requires 'party' -> 'party usually has'. Suggestions: use 'enjoy + -ing', use 'take part in', match number for nouns and verbs.

× You can just show yourself and in addition you can make friend in the, in the party.

✓ You can just show yourself and, in addition, you can make friends at the party.

'Make friend' is incorrect; the plural 'friends' is needed for the general meaning. Use preposition 'at' for events. Add commas for clarity. Suggestions: use 'make friends' and 'at the party'.

× Just you are, uh, strange you are.

✓ You might feel a bit strange.

Original is ungrammatical and repetitive. Use a concise, grammatical structure to express feeling: 'You might feel a bit strange.' Suggestions: avoid repetition and use modal 'might' for possibility.

× How often did you have a party when you were a kid?

✓ How often did you have parties when you were a kid?

Question uses past tense 'did' so the noun should match plural when asking about frequency; 'parties' is more natural. Suggestions: use plural for repeated events in past.

× Uh, in my memory, uh, when I was a child, I umm, can participate the campus party.

✓ In my memory, when I was a child, I could participate in campus parties.

The past context requires past modal 'could' not 'can'. 'Participate' should be followed by preposition 'in' and 'campus party' is better plural for habitual events. Suggestions: use 'could participate in' and pluralize when talking about repeated events.

× Uh, in the party, you can sing and dance with your friend, teacher or your classmate.

✓ At the party, you could sing and dance with your friends, teachers, or classmates.

Because the speaker is referring to past habit, change 'can' to past 'could'. Use plural forms 'friends, teachers, classmates' for general reference, and use 'at' for location. Suggestions: match tense and pluralize for generality.

× You uh, in addition, you can try a different snack.

✓ You could also try different snacks.

Past context -> 'could' not 'can'. 'A different snack' is awkward for general situations; use plural 'different snacks' or 'a variety of snacks'. Suggestions: use plural or 'a variety of' for general options and past modal 'could'.

× Let me think, Umm, I think my birthday party also as a party.

✓ Let me think. I consider my birthday celebration to be a party.

Original is ungrammatical. Use 'consider ... to be' or 'count as' to express equivalence. Also replace filler words and clarify. Suggestions: use 'I consider X to be Y' or 'I count my birthday celebration as a party.'

× So I just organize the, uh, happy birthday party when I was umm, 18 years old.

✓ So I organized a birthday party when I was 18 years old.

The event is in the past so use past tense 'organized' not 'organize'. Use article 'a' before 'birthday party' and remove unnecessary fillers. Suggestions: use past tense and correct article usage.

× I, umm, visit my friend, my family or my student.

✓ I invited my friends, my family, and some classmates.

Past tense required: 'visited' or 'invited'. 'My student' is unclear; likely meant 'my classmates' or 'students'. 'Visit' should be past form 'visited' but context of organizing a party fits 'invited'. Use plural forms for people invited. Suggestions: choose appropriate verb (invited) and plural nouns.