天气— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid redundant phrases and fix tense/number errors (e.g., "it turns out to be colder"). Use linking words like "however" or "also" for coherence.

範例: I live in Rajasthan, so the weather is mostly warm. However, it becomes noticeably cooler in the fall. I especially enjoy the monsoon season because the rain is refreshing and the air feels calm and clean.

建議: Give a direct topic sentence stating your preference, then provide two clear reasons. Fix grammar and incomplete sentence endings. Use linking words ("because", "also", "however") and be specific about examples.

範例: I prefer hot weather because I rarely get sick and I can do outdoor activities comfortably. Also, I enjoy experimenting with different outfits in warm weather, whereas winter limits my clothing choices to bulky sweaters.

建議: Answer directly and avoid filler sounds. Make sentences complete and logical. Provide specific supporting details and connect them with linking phrases ("for example", "also"). Avoid leaving thoughts unfinished.

範例: I prefer wet weather because the rainy season is lively and comforting. For example, I enjoy hearing birds chirp and I have fond memories of playing in the rain with my brother when we were kids. That said, I also like dry weather for outdoor activities like hiking.

建議: Start with a clear statement about your habit, then give a specific routine and reason. Remove fillers like "uh" and improve phrasing ("check the weather forecast"). Keep it concise and coherent with linking words like "for example".

範例: Yes, I check the weather forecast when I'm planning events. For example, if I have a party on Sunday I usually check the forecast on Friday or Saturday so I can decide what clothes to wear and whether to make outdoor arrangements.

建議: Provide a clearer, grammatically correct topic sentence and support it with specific effects and causes. Avoid vague or incorrect phrases ("ozone layer" without explanation). Use linking words like "because", "for example", and give one or two concrete consequences.

範例: Climate change has become more severe in recent years because of increased pollution and greenhouse gas emissions. For example, we see more frequent heatwaves and unpredictable weather, which affects agriculture and people's health.

建議: Begin with a direct answer, then give specific examples and a concise personal reason. Fix grammar and awkward phrasing. Use linking words ("for example", "even though") and avoid repetition.

範例: Yes, I would like to visit cities with different climates. For example, I went to Manali in February; although it was very cold for me, I loved the snowfall and building snowmen, which made the trip memorable.

× I live in Rajasthan so it's mostly warm weather and in fall it turn out to be much more colder than we can expect.

✓ I live in Rajasthan, so the weather is mostly warm, and in fall it turns out to be much colder than we might expect.

The sentence mixes present simple and incorrect verb forms. 'turn out' needs third person singular form 'turns out' (present tense agreement). 'more colder' is redundant; use 'colder' or 'much colder'. Also use 'the weather is' for clarity and add commas for readability. Use 'might expect' for a natural modal expression.

× And mostly I love the monsoon here, it's really refreshing and calming.

✓ I mostly love the monsoon here; it's really refreshing and calming.

This sentence is mostly correct but 'And mostly' at the start is informal and redundant. Replace with 'I mostly' and join clauses with a semicolon or a conjunction. Tenses are consistent (present simple).

× I mostly prefer hot weather because cold makes me sick and in hot weather I can be comfortable with activities outdoors and specially I can wear whatever I want because I like exploring with outfits.

✓ I mostly prefer hot weather because cold makes me sick, and in hot weather I can be comfortable doing outdoor activities; especially I can wear whatever I want because I like experimenting with outfits.

Use 'doing outdoor activities' instead of 'activities outdoors' for natural word order (present tense). 'specially' should be 'especially'. 'exploring with outfits' is awkward; 'experimenting with outfits' is clearer. Maintain present simple throughout.

× But in winters I can only wear hot warm sweaters which makes me.

✓ But in winter I can only wear heavy warm sweaters, which bothers me.

'In winters' should be 'in winter' (general habitual reference uses singular). 'hot warm' is redundant; use 'heavy warm' or 'thick'. The clause 'which makes me' is incomplete; add an adjective or verb like 'bothers me' to complete the thought.

× I like both of them, but I mostly like wet weather because of the rainy season.

✓ I like both, but I mostly prefer wet weather because of the rainy season.

'Both of them' is acceptable but 'both' is more concise. Change 'like' to 'prefer' for contrast with 'both'. Tense and structure are present simple and consistent.

× Uh, the birds chirping and moving around.

✓ I enjoy the birds chirping and moving around.

Original is a sentence fragment lacking a finite verb. Add a main verb like 'I enjoy' to make it a complete sentence.

× We can enjoy the rain season a lot because I used to play with my brother when we were kids in rain and also I like dry weather too because it.

✓ We could enjoy the rainy season a lot because I used to play with my brother in the rain when we were kids, and I also like dry weather.

'Can' should be 'could' to match recollection of past habit/context. 'Rain season' should be 'rainy season'. Move 'in the rain' to correct position. The clause 'because it.' is incomplete; remove it or complete—here it's removed and sentence split. Maintain past tense 'used to' for past habits.

× I mostly check weather of forecast when I am trying to plan something on my days coming.

✓ I mostly check the weather forecast when I am trying to plan something for the days ahead.

Use 'check the weather forecast' (correct noun phrase). 'on my days coming' is unnatural; use 'for the days ahead' or 'for upcoming days'. Present continuous 'I am trying' is fine.

× Uh, for example if I have a party on Sunday and then I will check the weather on Fridays or Saturdays so that I can tell if I can wear the clothes I want to or not.

✓ For example, if I have a party on Sunday, I check the weather on Friday or Saturday so that I can decide whether I can wear the clothes I want.

Avoid unnecessary 'then' and future 'will' when speaking about habitual actions; use present simple 'I check'. Use singular 'Friday or Saturday' to mean the closest day. 'Decide whether' is more natural than 'tell if'. Remove 'or not' at end for concision.

× The effects of climate change has gone from mild to extreme in the recent years and I can see that it's going because of so much pollution and ozone layer.

✓ The effects of climate change have gone from mild to extreme in recent years, and I think this is happening because of so much pollution and ozone depletion.

Subject 'effects' is plural, so use 'have' not 'has'. 'In the recent years' -> 'in recent years'. 'It's going because of so much pollution and ozone layer' is unnatural; clarify 'this is happening because of pollution and ozone depletion' (ozone layer cannot be a cause; ozone depletion is the issue).

× So the sunny weather is getting too much sunny I barely can make.

✓ So the weather is becoming extremely hot, and I can barely cope.

Original is ungrammatical and unclear. 'Too much sunny' is incorrect; use 'extremely hot' or 'too sunny'. 'I barely can make' is incomplete—'I can barely manage' or 'I can barely cope' completes the idea.

× I surely want to visit the cities because I like exploring places of different climates such as Manali as too cold for me, but I still like the snowfall season a lot.

✓ I definitely want to visit cities because I like exploring places with different climates. Manali is too cold for me, but I still love the snowfall season a lot.

Split into clearer sentences. 'Surely' is awkward; use 'definitely'. 'Places of different climates' -> 'places with different climates'. 'Such as Manali as too cold for me' is ungrammatical; make 'Manali is too cold for me'. Maintain present simple for general preference.

× I went there in February and it was really beautiful to watch the making snowmans and see the snowfall.

✓ I went there in February, and it was really beautiful to watch people making snowmen and to see the snowfall.

'Making snowmans' is incorrect: plural of 'snowman' is 'snowmen', and 'the making' is awkward—use 'people making snowmen'. Keep past tense consistent: 'went', 'was'. Add 'to' for parallel infinitive 'to watch... and to see...'.