零食— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Try to use correct verb tenses and avoid redundancy. Also, make your sentences clearer and more natural by simplifying phrases and improving grammar. For example, say "I usually eat snacks around 9:00 AM after checking my daily checklist. At work, I usually have my snacks in the lunchroom, and I prefer healthy snacks to keep my energy up."

範例: I usually eat snacks around 9:00 AM after I finish checking my daily checklist. At work, I have my snacks in the lunchroom, and I prefer healthy options to keep my energy levels high.

建議: Improve sentence structure and use linking words to connect ideas smoothly. Also, correct prepositions and plural forms. For example, say "I think eating snacks is healthy because it provides energy and helps me stay focused despite hectic work. For example, I eat yogurt sprinkled with granola to have a healthy and nutritious snack."

範例: I think eating snacks is healthy because it provides energy and helps me stay focused despite hectic work. For example, I eat yogurt sprinkled with granola to have a healthy and nutritious snack.

建議: Use past tense consistently and avoid repetition. Also, clarify your ideas and improve sentence flow. For example, say "Yes, when I was young, I often ate snacks during recess. My father usually brought healthy snacks to school for me. However, now I sometimes choose fast food snacks just to feel full."

範例: Yes, when I was young, I often ate snacks during recess. My father usually brought healthy snacks to school for me. However, now I sometimes choose fast food snacks just to feel full.

建議: Avoid repetition and improve grammar. Use linking words to connect ideas and express your opinion clearly. For example, say "I like to eat apples and bananas because they are healthy and nutritious. They give me adequate energy despite hectic work. I want to maintain this habit to live a longer, healthier life."

範例: I like to eat apples and bananas because they are healthy and nutritious. They give me adequate energy despite hectic work. I want to maintain this habit to live a longer, healthier life.

× Personally, I'm taking my snacks around 9:00 AM after I check already my items and my daily checklist.

✓ Personally, I take my snacks around 9:00 AM after I have already checked my items and my daily checklist.

The use of 'I'm taking' is incorrect here because the action is habitual, so simple present tense 'I take' is appropriate. Also, 'check already' is incorrect word order; it should be 'have already checked' to indicate a completed action before the snack time.

× In my work I took it usually into our lunch room and I'm taking healthy snacks to have energy for my buddy.

✓ At work, I usually take it into our lunch room and I take healthy snacks to have energy for my body.

The sentence mixes past tense 'I took' with present tense 'I'm taking'. Since the context is habitual, simple present 'I take' is correct. Also, 'my buddy' is likely a mistake for 'my body'.

× Personally, it's healthy for me to eat snacks as it provides energy and it enables for me to have focused despite of the hectic work.

✓ Personally, it's healthy for me to eat snacks as they provide energy and enable me to stay focused despite the hectic work.

'It provides' should be 'they provide' because 'snacks' is plural. 'Enables for me to have focused' is incorrect; correct form is 'enable me to stay focused'. Also, 'despite of' is incorrect preposition; it should be 'despite'.

× For example, I'm taking yogurt with sprinkle of granola so that I will have healthy and nutritious snacks.

✓ For example, I take yogurt with a sprinkle of granola so that I have healthy and nutritious snacks.

'I'm taking' is incorrect for habitual action; simple present 'I take' is appropriate. Also, 'sprinkle' needs an article 'a sprinkle'.

× Yeah, When I was young, I often eat snacks and my snacks, I'm taking it during recess.

✓ Yeah, when I was young, I often ate snacks and took them during recess.

The past time frame requires past tense verbs 'ate' and 'took' instead of present tense 'eat' and 'I'm taking'. Also, 'my snacks, I'm taking it' is awkward; better to say 'took them'.

× My father usually bring my snacks in into our school and then they make sure that it's healthy currently.

✓ My father usually brought my snacks to our school and then he made sure that they were healthy.

Since the context is past, verbs should be in past tense: 'brought', 'made sure'. Also, 'bring' should be 'brought'. 'They' is incorrect pronoun for 'father'; use 'he'. 'Currently' is unnecessary and awkward here.

× And now if I'm taking snacks, I'm not taking healthy foods.

✓ And now, if I take snacks, I don't take healthy foods.

For habitual present actions, simple present tense 'I take' is correct instead of present continuous 'I'm taking'.

× Well, the snacks that I like to eat are apples and banana.

✓ Well, the snacks that I like to eat are apples and bananas.

'Banana' should be plural 'bananas' to match 'apples' and the plural subject 'snacks'.

× They they are giving me a adequate energy despite of the hectic work.

✓ They give me adequate energy despite the hectic work.

Repeated 'They they' is an error. 'A adequate' is incorrect; 'adequate' is an adjective that does not need 'a'. Also, 'despite of' is incorrect; correct preposition is 'despite'.

× Umm, I want to maintain it so that I can be a having a prolonged life and I don't have I don't like to have a more.

✓ Umm, I want to maintain it so that I can have a prolonged life and I don't want to have more illnesses.

'Be a having' is incorrect; correct form is 'have'. The phrase 'I don't have I don't like to have a more' is unclear and ungrammatical; it is corrected to express the intended meaning clearly.