零食— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be concise and accurate: start with a clear topic sentence stating when you snack, then add one or two specific details. Correct tense and subject-verb agreement, and avoid filler words (uh). Use linking words like “usually” and “often” appropriately.

範例: I usually eat snacks at around 4:00 PM with my family. We often have tea together and sometimes enjoy biscuits or fries as an afternoon treat.

建議: Begin with a direct opinion, then give clear reasons and a practical solution. Use correct grammar (singular/plural agreement) and linking phrases like “because” or “instead” to connect ideas.

範例: I don’t think biscuits or fries are healthy because they are high in fat and sugar. Instead, replacing them with fruits, vegetables or unsalted nuts would make snacks much healthier.

建議: Give a clear past-time statement using past tense, then add one specific memory. Avoid incorrect pronouns and tense errors; use linking words like “when” or “often” to structure the answer.

範例: Yes, I often ate snacks when I was young. For example, when I was 12 my brother and I would share tea time snacks and sometimes even argue over the last biscuit.

建議: Answer directly and add one or two specific details to make the response natural. Keep sentences concise and use linking words if adding details. Mention why you like them for extra clarity.

範例: I like eating biscuits with my tea at around 4:00 PM, usually sitting in the garden for the fresh air. I enjoy this because it helps me relax in the afternoon.

× Student: Uh, usually at 4:00 PM with my family when it was, uh, two time, we loved to eat snacks along with the tea.

✓ Student: I usually eat snacks at 4:00 PM with my family. When I was younger, we loved to eat snacks with our tea.

Original sentence mixes present habit with a past time reference and has awkward phrasing ('when it was, uh, two time'). The present habit should use present tense ('I usually eat'), and the past habit should be in past tense with a clear time reference ('When I was younger, we loved...'). Split into two sentences for clarity and natural rhythm.

× Sometimes it were biscuits or some fries.

✓ Sometimes they were biscuits or fries.

The pronoun 'it' does not agree with plural items like biscuits or fries; use 'they' for plural. Also use past tense 'were' to match the past reference if continuing the past context; alternatively use 'are' for a present general statement.

× Actually eating biscuits or fries are not considered as good for our health, so if we replace them with fruits and vegetables and healthy dry fruits, it will be better to say that the snacks are healthy.

✓ Actually, eating biscuits or fries is not considered good for our health, so if we replace them with fruits, vegetables, or healthy dried fruits, the snacks would be healthier.

The gerund phrase 'eating biscuits or fries' is singular and takes 'is' not 'are'. 'Considered as' is incorrect here; use 'considered' without 'as'. 'Dry fruits' is better expressed as 'dried fruits'. For conditional result, use 'would be healthier' to convey a hypothetical improvement.

× Yes actually regularly we eat snacks.

✓ Yes, actually we used to eat snacks regularly.

The question asks about the past ('Did you often eat snacks when you were young?'), so respond in past tense. 'Used to' expresses a past habitual action: 'we used to eat snacks regularly.' Also add commas for natural speech.

× When I was 12 me and my brother were always into the snacks during their tea time.

✓ When I was 12, my brother and I were always into snacks during our tea time.

Use the subject pronoun order 'my brother and I' rather than 'me and my brother'. 'Their tea time' incorrectly refers to someone else; use 'our tea time' to refer to the speaker and brother. Remove the article 'the' before 'snacks' for natural phrasing.

× We usually fought for the snacks at that time.

✓ We usually fought over the snacks at that time.

Use 'fought over' rather than 'fought for' when describing competing for an item. The past habitual action 'usually fought' is correct; keep past tense to match the time frame.

× I like to eat biscuits with tea at 4:00 PM in my garden with the fresh air.

✓ I like to eat biscuits with tea at 4:00 PM in my garden because of the fresh air.

Original is understandable but awkward: 'with the fresh air' is not idiomatic. Use 'because of the fresh air' to explain the reason. Maintain present tense as this is a current preference.