耐心— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be concise, avoid hesitations and repetition, and give a clear topic sentence followed by one or two specific supporting reasons or examples. Use linking words like 'because' or 'for example' and correct word choice (e.g., 'tolerant' instead of 'tolerated'). Keep to under five sentences.

範例: No, I'm not very patient. I often get annoyed when things take too long because I prefer to work efficiently, for example when people delay agreed plans. However, I'm trying to improve by practicing deep breathing and reminding myself of the benefits of staying calm.

建議: Start with a clear statement and give a specific example. Remove filler words like 'actually' and 'however' used together. Use linking words such as 'especially' or 'for instance' and avoid repeating the same idea.

範例: Many things make me impatient, but especially when people move very slowly. For instance, I feel frustrated when public transport delays cause people to queue slowly, because it wastes everyone's time and makes me anxious about missing appointments.

建議: Give a clear topic sentence describing your feelings, then support with a reason or example. Correct grammar ('it gets monotonous' and 'better results') and use linking words like 'because' or 'so' to connect ideas. Keep it under five sentences.

範例: I find long tasks quite monotonous because my mind tends to wander after a while. To cope, I break the work into smaller steps and take short breaks, which helps me stay responsible and achieve better results.

建議: Answer directly that you don't currently have a job, then explain using clear vocabulary why your intended profession requires patience. Avoid filler words and correct collocations ('more calm' not 'more calmer'; 'easier' not 'more easier'). Use one or two supporting points.

範例: I don't have a job at the moment, but in my dream job as a doctor I would definitely need to be patient. Doctors must listen carefully to patients and remain calm during stressful situations, so I am working on staying calm and gaining experience.

建議: Provide a clear comparative statement and a concise reason or example of how you improved. Avoid contradicting phrases (you said you were patient as a child and also more patient now); clarify the comparison. Use linking words like 'because' or 'as' to explain.

範例: Yes, I'm more patient now than as a child because life experience has taught me to manage my reactions. For example, handling stressful study deadlines has helped me practice patience and I expect to improve further with time.

× Uh, really I am not.

✓ Uh, I'm really not.

Word order: adverb 'really' should come after the auxiliary verb 'am' in the contraction. Use the contracted form 'I'm' for natural spoken English. Suggestion: say 'I'm really not' for natural emphasis.

× So I really need to work on this.

✓ I really need to work on this.

Beginning a sentence with 'So' is acceptable in speech but unnecessary. Removing 'So' produces a clearer sentence. Keep tense and meaning the same.

× I'm not a tolerated person, so this isn't very easy for me.

✓ I'm not a tolerant person, so this isn't very easy for me.

Wrong adjective form: 'tolerated' is a past participle meaning 'allowed', while 'tolerant' is the adjective meaning 'able to tolerate'. Use 'tolerant person'.

× Uh, but I believe that uh, umm, trying to, to be more patient, umm, will give me many.

✓ I believe that trying to be more patient will benefit me in many ways.

Incomplete sentence: 'will give me many' is unfinished. Replace with a complete noun phrase like 'benefit me in many ways'. Also remove filler words and duplicate 'to'.

× Actually, many things make me feel impatient, but however, the most the single thing that makes me the most frustrated and impatient is when people are moving very slowly.

✓ Actually, many things make me feel impatient; the single thing that frustrates me most is when people move very slowly.

Redundant contrast markers: 'but' and 'however' together is unnecessary. Awkward phrasing 'the most the single thing that makes me the most' is repetitive. Simplify to 'the single thing that frustrates me most'. Also use simple present 'move' for general situations.

× This makes me not.

✓ This makes me impatient.

Fragment: 'This makes me not' is ungrammatical and incomplete. Replace with a clear adjective 'impatient' to complete the thought.

× This makes me very frustrated and mad.

✓ This makes me very frustrated and angry.

Stylistic: 'mad' is informal and ambiguous in some varieties of English; 'angry' is the clearer adjective. 'Frustrated and angry' is more natural collocation.

× I'm a person that it's gets really monotonous about something when I need to do it for a really long time.

✓ I'm a person who finds something really monotonous when I have to do it for a long time.

Incorrect pronoun and verb construction: use 'who' for people, not 'that it's'. 'finds something monotonous' is clearer than 'it's gets really monotonous about something'. Use 'have to' instead of 'need to' for obligation and simplify 'for a long time'.

× I believe that I really need to work on this aspect.

✓ I believe that I really need to work on this aspect.

No grammatical change required; sentence is acceptable. Keep as is. (Included only to show it meets allowed types.)

× Additionally, I try to be very responsible in what I'm doing so that I can have a better results.

✓ Additionally, I try to be very responsible in what I'm doing so that I can have better results.

Article error: 'a better results' mixes singular article 'a' with plural 'results'. Remove 'a' to match plural 'results', or change to 'a better result' for singular. Suggestion: use 'better results'.

× Uh, to be honest, I don't have a job, but, uh, however, uh, in my dream job, uh, being a doctor, uh, I really need to be patient.

✓ To be honest, I don't have a job, but in my dream job as a doctor I would need to be patient.

Preposition and article use: 'in my dream job, being a doctor' is awkward. Use 'in my dream job as a doctor' or 'as a doctor'. Also prefer conditional 'would need' when describing a hypothetical job. Remove redundant 'but' and 'however'.

× So that's why I need to work on my, on my tolerance.

✓ So that's why I need to work on my tolerance.

Redundant repetition 'on my, on my' should be removed. Keep single phrase 'work on my tolerance'.

× Umm, I believe that with time and with more experience, I will become a more calmer person and everything will be more easier.

✓ I believe that with time and more experience I will become a calmer person and everything will be easier.

Comparative and adjective order errors: 'more calmer' is double comparative; use 'calmer'. 'more easier' is incorrect double comparative; use 'easier'. Also drop unnecessary 'with' repetition and filler 'umm'.

× I am definitely more patient now.

✓ I am definitely more patient now.

Sentence is correct; no change needed. Present tense 'am' correctly matches 'I'. Included to confirm correct usage.

× Umm, although when I was a child, I was, uh, I was really, uh, patient, but now I'm more tolerant.

✓ Although when I was a child I was very patient, now I'm more tolerant.

Remove excessive fillers and repetition. 'really patient' is acceptable but 'very patient' is smoother. Also avoid using both 'although' and 'but' together; connect clauses cleanly.

× And I believe that with more experience in the future and the situations that uh, make me, uh, make grow me as a person, I will become even more.

✓ I believe that with more experience and situations that help me grow as a person, I will become even more patient.

Unclear and awkward phrasing 'make grow me' and incomplete ending 'become even more'. Clarify 'situations that help me grow' and finish with 'more patient' to state what will increase. Remove filler words.