列表— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid redundant phrases (e.g. “chronologically” and “in order” together) and minor grammar slips. Vary vocabulary slightly (e.g. ‘helps me remember’ or ‘keeps me focused’).

範例: Yes, I usually make a shopping list. For example, when I go to the market with my sibling I write items down so I won’t forget anything and can shop faster. This keeps me focused and prevents impulse buys.

建議: Improve clarity and sentence structure: open with a direct answer, then give specific, well-linked details. Avoid uncertainty words like “probably” and repeat phrases. Use linking words (for example, therefore, so) and a concise final result sentence.

範例: Yes — I always make a work list. As a communications officer at an NGO, I list the people I need to contact and the tasks to complete each day, and then tick them off as I finish. This helps me manage time and ensures nothing is missed.

建議: Focus on coherence and accuracy. Begin with a clear opinion, give two specific reasons using linking words, and avoid unclear pronouns and awkward phrases (“she takes it, she takes his course on them”, “keep you intact”). Use precise vocabulary and correct grammar.

範例: Some people dislike lists because they feel lists limit spontaneity and reduce flexibility. For instance, creative people may prefer to follow inspiration rather than a schedule. However, I find lists helpful because they clarify priorities and explain why tasks are important.

建議: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a direct preference, give one clear reason and one brief contrast with linking words. Fix awkward phrasing (“people feels better personally”) and use precise expressions (e.g. ‘more distracting’).

範例: I prefer making lists on paper because writing helps me remember and feel more committed to my goals. Although phone lists are convenient, they tend to be more distracting due to notifications.

× Well, when I go shopping, which is usually with my sibling, I make a list and that's to help me follow through with what I want chronologically and in order not to forget anything really.

✓ Well, when I go shopping, usually with my sibling, I make a list to help me follow through with what I want in order and so I don't forget anything.

The original sentence uses awkward pronoun and phrase constructions ('that's to help me follow through... and in order not to forget anything really'). Simplify by removing 'that's' and reordering to clarify the purpose. Use 'so I don't forget' instead of the awkward 'in order not to forget anything really'. Keep tense and meaning consistent.

× All the times when I go to the market, I make a list and it helps keep me in check.

✓ Every time I go to the market, I make a list, and it helps keep me in check.

'All the times when' is an awkward plural expression; use 'Every time' or 'Whenever' for habitual actions. This corrects number and natural usage while maintaining present-tense habit.

× Well, I work at a non governmental organization as a communications officer.

✓ Well, I work at a non-governmental organization as a communications officer.

The phrase should be 'a non-governmental organization' (hyphenated adjective and 'a' article). Also 'non-governmental' modifies 'organization' and needs a hyphen for clarity. This fixes article and adjective form.

× So yes, I do make a list for probably the number of people I'm supposed to contact per day I'm supposed to communicate with the number of activities I'm supposed to carry out per day.

✓ So yes, I do make a list of the number of people I'm supposed to contact each day, the people I'm supposed to communicate with, and the activities I'm supposed to carry out each day.

Original sentence runs phrases together without proper connectors and has redundant parts. Break into parallel list elements and add prepositions ('of') and commas to clarify items. This corrects run-on structure and improves clarity.

× And it actually works because at the end of the day I have to tick off each item on my list.

✓ And it actually works because at the end of the day I have to tick off each item on my list.

This sentence is grammatically correct; no change needed. It uses present tense habit correctly and the verb phrase 'have to tick off' is appropriate. Included for completeness; no past participle error present.

× Well, some people believe that making lists keeps them in a box.

✓ Well, some people believe that making lists keeps them in a box.

Sentence is correct as written; pronoun 'them' correctly refers to 'some people'. No change needed. Included for completeness.

× It doesn't allow them to be flexible.

✓ It doesn't allow them to be flexible.

Sentence is grammatically correct; pronoun reference is fine. No change needed.

× Some people are outgoing and just believe the day she takes it, she takes his course on them.

✓ Some people are outgoing and just believe that each day will take its course for them.

The original sentence has mixed and incorrect pronouns ('she' and 'his') and an unclear idiom. Rephrase to 'each day will take its course' and keep pronouns consistent ('them') to match 'some people'. This corrects pronoun agreement and restores idiomatic meaning.

× Well, while this is good, I believe making a list will help you keep you intact, make you understand what you're doing and why you are doing it.

✓ Well, while this can be good, I believe making a list will help keep you organized, and help you understand what you are doing and why.

Original repeats 'you' ('help you keep you intact') and uses awkward 'keep you intact'. Replace with 'keep you organized' and remove redundancy. Also simplify final clause to avoid repetition and improve natural phrasing.

× Frankly speaking, I prefer the old school way of making a list on a paper and that's because it feels like I'm giving life to what I want.

✓ Frankly speaking, I prefer the old-school way of making a list on paper because it feels like I'm giving life to what I want.

Use 'old-school' with a hyphen, and 'on paper' not 'on a paper' for general medium. Remove 'that's' for conciseness. This corrects article misuse and adjective punctuation.

× On the phone is good, but there are distractions.

✓ Using the phone is convenient, but there are distractions.

'On the phone is good' is incomplete/awkward. Rephrase to 'Using the phone is convenient' to form a proper subject and verb and convey intended meaning.

× The other distractions on phone people feels better personally.

✓ Other people feel better using their phones, but there are distractions for me personally.

Original sentence is ungrammatical and mixes ideas. Clarify by splitting into two clauses: some people prefer their phones ('other people feel better using their phones') and add the speaker's opinion ('but there are distractions for me personally'). This fixes pronoun and subject-verb agreement and clarifies meaning.