鞋子— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Improve grammatical accuracy and clarity: start with a clear topic sentence, correct subject-verb agreement, and avoid unnecessary words. Keep answer within 2–3 sentences and add a specific frequency. Use linking words if adding a reason.

範例: Yes, I enjoy buying shoes. I usually buy new basketball shoes every two or three months because I'm a big NBA fan and I often go shopping with my friends at the mall near my home.

建議: Make statements clear and grammatically correct, reduce hesitation words, and use linking words for reasons. Provide one clear reason and an example. Use correct comparative forms and article usage.

範例: Yes, I have bought shoes online. I prefer online stores because they often offer big discounts, so shoes are usually cheaper than in malls, and there is a wider variety to choose from.

建議: Give a clear amount with correct sentence structure and explain briefly why you spend that much. Avoid confusing tenses and redundant phrases.

範例: On average, I spend about 1,000 RMB a year on shoes because I buy several pairs of basketball and casual shoes for sports and daily wear.

建議: Start with a direct topic sentence stating your preference, then give a concise reason and an example. Use linking words (however, while) to compare with others and avoid filler words.

範例: I prefer fashionable shoes because I like trendy designs and well-known brands. However, my parents prefer comfortable shoes since they value support and practicality.

× That's mainly because I'm big fans of NBA, so I always buy shoe basketball shoes with my best friends at weekends in the shopping mall which snailed by my home.

✓ That's mainly because I'm a big fan of the NBA, so I always buy basketball shoes with my best friends on weekends at the shopping mall near my home.

Pronoun and noun number: 'I'm big fans' mixes singular 'I am' with plural 'fans' so change to 'I'm a big fan'. 'NBA' is a specific organization and takes the definite article 'the NBA'. Word order and word choice: 'buy shoe basketball shoes' is incorrect; 'buy basketball shoes' is correct. Prepositions: use 'on weekends' and 'at the shopping mall near my home' instead of 'at weekends in the shopping mall which snailed by my home' (snailed is incorrect). Overall corrects pronoun agreement and fixes preposition and word order errors.

× Uh, absolutely. I ever, uh, have everybody shows online.

✓ Uh, absolutely. I always watch product shows online.

Tense and word choice: 'I ever ... have everybody shows online' is ungrammatical. 'Ever' is not correct here; likely meaning is habitual present so use 'always' and present tense 'watch'. 'Everybody shows' is unclear; 'product shows' or 'product demonstrations' fits context. This corrects tense and clarifies meaning.

× This might because, you know, umm, the online shopping always gave me a big discount.

✓ This might be because, you know, online shopping always gives me big discounts.

Verb form and tense: need the linking verb 'be' after 'might' so 'might be because'. 'Always gave' uses past tense but context is a general habitual fact, so use present simple 'gives'. 'A big discount' can be pluralized to 'big discounts' for generality. This fixes present-tense usage and adds missing verb.

× So buy shoes in online are more cheaper than buy it in the shopping mall and you can buy the more kinds of shoes.

✓ So buying shoes online is cheaper than buying them in the shopping mall, and you can buy more kinds of shoes online.

Use gerund forms: 'buy shoes in online' should be 'buying shoes online'. Subject-verb agreement: 'are more cheaper' is wrong; use 'is cheaper' (not 'more cheaper'). Pronouns: 'buy it' should be 'buy them' (shoes plural). Word order: 'the more kinds' -> 'more kinds of shoes'. Also place 'online' appropriately. This corrects preposition, verb form and agreement, and pronoun errors.

× Normally for each year the average cost for the shoes around 1000 RMB for me.

✓ Normally each year the average cost for shoes for me is around 1000 RMB.

Sentence order and tense: Use present simple for habitual action: 'each year the average cost ... is around'. Remove unnecessary articles: 'the shoes' -> 'shoes'. Place 'for me' correctly. This corrects tense and article use.

× So I think shoes is very important it was to cost it.

✓ So I think shoes are very important; they are worth the cost.

Subject-verb agreement: 'shoes' is plural so use 'are' not 'is'. Original sentence is garbled: 'it was to cost it' is incorrect. Clarify meaning with 'they are worth the cost' to express value. This fixes agreement and sentence structure.

× Well, in my opinion, I'm really into buying fashionable shoes that many because I'm a younger man.

✓ Well, in my opinion, I'm really into buying fashionable shoes because I'm a young man.

Word choice and tense: 'that many' is incorrect and unnecessary; remove it. Use 'young' rather than 'younger' unless comparing to someone. Present simple 'I'm' is fine. This corrects adjective misuse and clarifies meaning.

× So, uh, I like the shoes which looked very fashionable and which is the famous brand.

✓ So, uh, I like shoes that look very fashionable and are from famous brands.

Tense and agreement: 'which looked' uses past tense but should be present 'look' for current preference. Use 'that' or 'which' appropriately and ensure subject-verb agreement: 'which is the famous brand' should be 'are from famous brands' to match plural 'shoes'. Also prefer 'from famous brands' for natural phrasing.

× But for my parents, they may be like comfortable shoes.

✓ But my parents may prefer comfortable shoes.

Pronoun redundancy and word choice: 'for my parents, they' is redundant; just 'my parents' suffices. Use verb 'prefer' to express liking toward a category. This corrects pronoun misuse and improves clarity.