鞋子— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be direct and clear: start with a topic sentence stating whether you like buying shoes, then give concise reasons and a frequency. Avoid hesitations and unclear words (e.g. "passing", "1A years"). Use linking words to connect ideas. Include one or two specific details (types, activities) and keep it under five sentences.

範例: Yes, I like buying shoes, especially sneakers, because I use them for exercise. I usually buy a new pair every one to two years since I don’t change my style often.

建議: Answer directly and provide clear reasons and examples. Replace vague words like "proteins", "schemes cases", "knickers" with correct terms (stores, scams, sneakers). Use a linking phrase (for example, because/so) and limit to a few clear sentences. Mention a specific concern and an alternative (trying shoes in physical shops).

範例: No, I haven’t bought shoes online because I’m worried about scams and wrong sizes. Instead, I prefer going to stores so I can try on different styles, such as sneakers or leather shoes, before I buy them.

建議: Give a clear numeric answer and explain briefly why. Correct currency and structure: if you mean a modest amount, state it clearly (e.g. $20–50 per pair or $200 per year). Avoid contradictory statements ("don’t spend a lot" vs "$2000"). Use one linking phrase to explain purpose (for exercise).

範例: I don’t spend much on shoes; I spend around $200 per year because I only buy practical pairs for exercise rather than fashion items.

建議: Start with a clear topic sentence stating your preference, then give one or two specific reasons with linking words (because, therefore). Reduce repetition and hesitations, and include a short example of an activity that requires comfort.

範例: I prefer comfortable shoes because I often run and exercise, so I need supportive sneakers that protect my feet and make workouts easier.

× Yes, I like passing shoes, especially sneaker, uh, because I can uh, do exercise by sneakers.

✓ Yes, I like buying shoes, especially sneakers, because I can exercise in them.

The student used incorrect verb 'passing' and singular 'sneaker' where plural 'sneakers' is correct. 'Do exercise by' is unidiomatic; use 'exercise in' or 'use them for exercise'. This is a sentence structure and word choice issue. Suggestion: use correct verb 'buy' and plural nouns when referring generally, and the idiomatic preposition 'in' for wearing shoes while exercising.

× Umm, so uh, I buy the shoes, uh, maybe 1A years because, uh, I don't need to change the style.

✓ Umm, so I buy shoes maybe every one or two years because I don't need to change my style.

The original has plural/singular confusion and an unclear time expression '1A years'. Also 'the shoes' is too specific; use 'shoes' generally. Use a clear frequency phrase like 'every one or two years' and 'my style' for possession. Suggestion: use clear time expressions and correct articles.

× I haven't bought shoes on the Internet because it is very dangerous because nowadays we have many schemes cases on from from the Internet.

✓ I haven't bought shoes on the Internet because it can be risky nowadays; there are many scams online.

'Schemes cases on from the Internet' is incorrect. Use 'scams' and 'online' or 'on the Internet'. Also avoid repeating 'because'. Suggestion: simplify and use common collocations: 'scams online' or 'fraud on the Internet'.

× So I want to go to the proteins and try to different styles of shoes, for example knickers or leather shoes.

✓ So I want to go to the stores and try different styles of shoes, for example sneakers or leather shoes.

'Proteins' and 'knickers' are incorrect word choices (wrong words). Likely intended 'stores' and 'sneakers'. Also 'try to different' should be 'try different'. This is a vocabulary and sentence structure error. Suggestion: choose correct nouns and omit unnecessary 'to' after 'try' when followed by a noun.

× Generally speaking, I don't spend a lot money on buying shoes.

✓ Generally speaking, I don't spend a lot of money on shoes.

Missing article 'of' in the phrase 'a lot of money'. Also 'on buying shoes' is wordy; 'on shoes' is natural. Suggestion: use the standard collocation 'a lot of money'.

× I, I bought $2000 per year because I'm not keen on buying shoes there.

✓ I spend about $2000 per year because I'm not keen on buying lots of shoes.

Using 'bought' (past) is inconsistent with stating a usual yearly amount; use present tense 'spend'. 'Buying shoes there' is unclear—replace with 'buying lots of shoes' or 'buying many shoes'. Suggestion: match tense to habitual action (present simple).

× So I just, uh, I use the shoes, uh, for my exercise and, and.

✓ So I just use the shoes for my exercise.

Sentence is fragmented and repetitive. Remove fillers and the trailing 'and'. Use a complete concise sentence. Suggestion: practice producing concise statements and avoid filler words.

× I think I prefer to buying comfortable shoes, uh, because, uh, I like doing exercise, uh, like running, uh, so I need to, uh, comfortable shoes, uh, comfortable sneakers, uh, for exercise, uh, it's helpful for my life.

✓ I think I prefer to buy comfortable shoes because I like exercising, such as running, so I need comfortable sneakers for exercise; they're helpful for my life.

After 'prefer' the correct infinitive is 'to buy' or use gerund 'buying' without 'to' (prefer buying). The student mixed forms 'prefer to buying'. 'Doing exercise' is better as 'exercising'. Also remove redundant words and fillers. Suggestion: use 'prefer to buy' or 'prefer buying', 'exercise' -> 'exercising', and simplify the sentence.