爱好— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more natural and concise: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details. Fix grammar and verb forms, and avoid trailing or incomplete words. Use linking words to connect ideas (for example, “and” or “so”).

範例: I enjoy photography. I take photos and edit them to improve color and composition, and I also make short videos for friends. In addition, I watch YouTube tutorials about filmmaking and photography to learn new techniques.

建議: Use correct tense and complete sentences: start with a past-tense topic sentence, then give specific examples. Avoid unfinished sentences and unnecessary repetition. Use a linking word like “also” or “in addition” for coherence.

範例: When I was a child, my favorite pastime was playing with my friends. We often played traditional Filipino games such as Patentero and Luksong Baka. I also enjoyed watching music videos and following my favorite pop singers.

建議: Maintain consistent tense and polish phrasing. Begin with a clear topic sentence in present perfect or present tense that links childhood to now. Correct word choices (e.g., “new releases”) and use linking phrases like “so” or “therefore” correctly.

範例: Yes — I have listened to music since I was a child. Even now, I regularly check Spotify for new releases and top songs to discover different genres and artists.

建議: Make your response direct and avoid repetition and unfinished thoughts. Start with a clear topic sentence stating whether your hobbies match your family, then support with one specific example. Remove repeated words and correct phrasing (e.g., “sing along”).

範例: Yes, my hobbies are similar to my siblings'. As children we watched music channels together and often sang along to our favorite bands, which became a fun family activity.

× I also like making videos for my friends and watch YouTube about filmmaking and photography con.

✓ I also like making videos for my friends and watching YouTube about filmmaking and photography.

The verbs coordinated by 'and' should share the same form. 'Like making' uses a gerund (making), so 'watch' should be changed to the gerund 'watching' to keep parallel structure. Also remove 'con' which appears to be a fragment or typo. Suggestion: use parallel gerunds after 'like' and proofread for stray fragments.

× When I was a child, my favorite pastime is to play with my friends.

✓ When I was a child, my favorite pastime was playing with my friends.

The sentence begins in the past ('When I was a child'), so the verb describing that past state should also be in the past ('was'). Additionally, 'to play' is an infinitive; using the gerund 'playing' is more natural after 'pastime'. Ensure tense consistency by keeping both clauses in the past.

× We used to play traditional Filipino games like Patentero or luksongbaka.

✓ We used to play traditional Filipino games like Patentero or luksong baka.

This sentence is mostly correct grammatically. The only issue is formatting: 'luksong baka' is typically written as two words. No change in verb form is needed because 'used to' correctly indicates a past habitual action. Maintain proper spacing for named games.

× I also enjoyed watching music videos. I am a fan of a lot of pop singers and I.

✓ I also enjoyed watching music videos. I was a fan of many pop singers.

The first clause is past tense ('enjoyed'), so the next clause should match that past perspective ('was a fan'). The original ends with an incomplete clause 'and I.' which is a fragment and needs removal or completion. Use 'many' instead of 'a lot of' before a plural count noun for more natural phrasing.

× Yes I do, ever since I was a kid I enjoy listening to music and watch music videos.

✓ Yes I do; ever since I was a kid I have enjoyed listening to music and watching music videos.

The phrase 'ever since I was a kid' connects a past starting point to a continuing action, which requires the present perfect ('have enjoyed') rather than simple present. Also maintain parallel gerunds: 'listening' and 'watching'. Use a semicolon or conjunction to separate the initial agreement from the rest of the sentence.

× So until now I still check on Spotify, stop releases or top songs and discover different genres.

✓ So until now I still check Spotify for new releases or top songs and discover different genres.

Use 'check Spotify' (no 'on') and the preposition 'for' before 'new releases' to express purpose. 'Stop releases' is incorrect and likely a typo for 'new releases'. Maintain parallel structure with 'check... and discover' (both base verbs are acceptable here), but correct word choice matters. Clarify intended meaning and avoid typos.

× Yes, when I was a kid, my siblings and I used to watch music channels together.

✓ Yes. When I was a kid, my siblings and I used to watch music channels together.

This sentence is grammatically correct in tense and structure. I suggest separating 'Yes' as its own sentence or with a comma; changing to 'Yes.' improves clarity. No tense change is needed because 'used to' correctly indicates habitual past action.

× So we sing a long to our favorite bands and favorite pop artists.

✓ So we sang along to our favorite bands and pop artists.

The context refers to a past habit ('when I was a kid'), so verb tense should be past: 'sang along'. Also 'sing a long' is incorrect spacing and phrase; the correct phrasal verb is 'sing along'. Use past tense to match 'used to' earlier and write 'pop artists' without repeating 'favorite'.

× And I think it's it's a way it's it's a fun way for us to buy.

✓ And I think it's a fun way for us to bond.

The original contains repetition ('it's it's a way it's it's') and an incomplete or incorrect ending ('to buy'), producing a fragmented, unclear sentence. Likely intended meaning is that singing together is a fun way to bond. Replace the fragment with a concise, complete clause. Avoid repetition and ensure the verb completes the idea.